Toilet issues

mambo69

Hi all


Just after some advise on how to deal with my 5 year old son. Recently he has started soiling himself, sometimes up to 4 times in a day.

Up till now he has always been good going to the loo, we checked with School and he has no issues there.

His brother has just started on the potty training, although at the moment it consists of sitting on the potty or loo every so often and getting used to it, and I wonder if he is reacting against this?

The big issue is we dont know how to deal with it, we started with a reward chart, cross if he was solied, tick if he was clean but since then he has got worse not better.


Any suggestions are welcomed as i dont know where to go to get him out of this problem.

Nicki

With a child this age who has previously been clean, I would always always check medical issues first before assuming this is a behavioural thing. Would he normally poo 4 times a day, and is the soiling a normal amount or just a little? Sometimes kids get constipated and impacted, which results in small amounts of leakage of poo without clearing the blockage in the bowel. Its more common than you might think, and no amount of reward charts or discouragement can solve it. Definitely worth getting him checked over by a GP for this kind of thing and definitely don't try to self treat with OTC laxatives.

Flyboy152

mambo69 wrote: »

Hi all


Just after some advise on how to deal with my 5 year old son. Recently he has started soiling himself, sometimes up to 4 times in a day.

Up till now he has always been good going to the loo, we checked with School and he has no issues there.

His brother has just started on the potty training, although at the moment it consists of sitting on the potty or loo every so often and getting used to it, and I wonder if he is reacting against this?

These are the salient points: Recently he has started school (the second biggest change in his life) and he is not at home with you anymore and his younger brother is getting the attention linked to the toilet.

The big issue is we dont know how to deal with it, we started with a reward chart, cross if he was solied, tick if he was clean but since then he has got worse not better.

Not a great surprise really, he gets more attention, with more powerful emotion, when he has soiled himself. Not the best thing, to give him negative reactions when he does this, it can cause a great deal more harm than good.

Any suggestions are welcomed as i dont know where to go to get him out of this problem.

He might just grow out of it. The fact that it doesn't happen at school would suggest (only suggest, for the amateur paediatricians out there and no, I am no expert either) that it is unlikely to be a medical problem.

mambo69

Apolgies it does now happen at school as well, its not isolated to home. However its more like he is not wanting to go than cant, as once you sit him on the loo he is happy to go

Flyboy152

Sorry, I don't understand, what did you mean by, "we checked with School and he has no issues there?"

mambo69

I meant he has no personal issues causing him to be worried, and is not being picked on at all. in fact they mentioned how happy and generally good natured he is most of the time.

Flyboy152

mambo69 wrote: »

I meant he has no personal issues causing him to be worried, and is not being picked on at all. in fact they mentioned how happy and generally good natured he is most of the time.

Aah, of course, it's blooming obvious now. :doh:

Nicki

Not an amateur paediatrician at all, or even a real one just an experienced mum who has known this to happen more than once with friends children and also knows it is very serious if left untreated. Why would anyone not rule out a physical cause for a physical problem before resorting to reward and punishment (confused smilie)?

I think the medical term is faecal impaction should OP want to google to see what I'm talking about.

dizzyblonde82

My 5 year old son has been going through the same problems and I mentioned it to his paediatrician this week and my son has been prescribed movicol to help with this issue. According to the doctor if a child doesn't go to the toilet regularly they can loose some of the sensations of needing to go and therefore they do not realise that they are soiling themselves which is actually the overflow of what the bowel can no longer hold.

faithcecilia

Another vote for checking if this is actually constipation.

Two other thoughts though...

Can he wipe his own bottom properly? Could it possibly be that he is going for a poo, not wiping, then scratching his bottom so it looks like he is messing?

If you do believe, after seeing a dr to rule out physical problems, that it is 'playing up' then try to ignore it (quick change and wash) and reward staying clean - I would forget a cross if he messes, just give a tick if he is clean. When we toilet trained the boy I care for we got some lovely smiley stickers and he got one after every 'sucess', accidents were just ignored and not 'rewarded' with a criticism.

mambo69

he has been on the movicol before so may be worth booking him a doctors visit again to see if thats the reason.

I think the reward scheme was because initially it was like he was just not telling any one he needed the loo, he has the habit of forgetting to ask at times, when he is involved so to start we thought it may be the solution, but now its becoming to often hence asking the forum for ideas, all of which are gratefully received