how do you work it in a relationship when

Deals_2

one person spends more in the relationship than teh other? also if they run a business and you know they are over spending should you take the brunt too? how have you worked it out who pays for what? thanks

balletshoes

If you are a couple, living together, have children together etc, your finances are part of your relationship. Presumably the business one of you runs is at least some of the income for the household? What do you mean by overspending/spending more than the other? If there is enough money coming in in total for you as a family to all be supported and you can budget for the big purchases/long term financial responsibilities, does it matter who spends what?

If it does matter to you, why does it? Obviously if the one who is overspending is doing it to the detriment of the household/family (ie spending down the pub when theres not enough food in the fridge/no money for utility bills) then you need to discuss it together and come to a compromise.

Tropez

Each of us pay a small percentage of our income into a savings account that is used for any of our household bills (ie. stuff that we both need - electric, gas, water etc.). I earn more than her and I am at home more often hence I'm using more of the fuel so it makes sense that I pay a little more towards the bills. Something like Sky, I pay for because I want it. I generally buy the food shop online and my partner buys anything extra we might need/want, or I may have forgotten on her way home from work.

Aside from that though, we keep our finances separate and providing the bills get paid there isn't anything to gain by keeping them together.

Plans_all_plans

I couldn't personally be in a relationship where one's a spender, one's a saver. It'd do my head in. It's vitally important to me that financially we think similarly.

In your scenario, the only way round it I can see is suggested by Tropez above. However, I personally wouldn't be happy with that sort of set up, so it depends if you think you could manage your finances in such a way.

Deals_2

but not always something you can forsee and sometiems relationships can change too!

Plans_all_plans wrote: »

I couldn't personally be in a relationship where one's a spender, one's a saver. It'd do my head in. It's vitally important to me that financially we think similarly.

In your scenario, the only way round it I can see is suggested by Tropez above. However, I personally wouldn't be happy with that sort of set up, so it depends if you think you could manage your finances in such a way.

Plans_all_plans

Can you see yourselves doing as Tropez suggested then?

I can understand relationships change and you can't foresee everything, but I would be surprised if my husband suddenly started splashing out on gadgets, when naturally he is cautious with money. Unless the other person in your relationship has an addiction problem, I can't see that their spending habits are likely to change overnight.

With regard to the business: if my husband had a business and it was in trouble, then I'd fully expect the household as a whole to pick up any slack and find a mutually acceptable way of getting it back in the black.