Help with a DWP Tribunal

overtired

Hi
He knows he has got normal blood pressure because he has been to this GP last year. He takes weeks to build himself up to going to the doctors, and he will go as long as (he thinks that they do not Know about his mental health, problems?). I know it sounds very strange (not to someone who has got OCD) but that is why he has been changing GPs, (he has had 4 in 30years, which includes, 3 in the last 4 years because of his illness) they usually upset him, but with this GP he thinks that he is starting a fresh.
Hope this is not too confusing
Thank you
N

overtired

Thank you allen35
I will try to get as much help as I can.
I will contact the hospital, and my GP.
My husband will not go to any tribunal, and I would not be able to get away to go myself, he follows be about all the time, he thinks that I am writing to my pen friend now, so he is not bothering me he is next to me trying to get a sleep, he wont be able to he never does, so I will go down stairs in a minute with him to make some hot milk, sometimes it sounds like I am looking after a child, only this one is very very bright.
There is no chance of letting any medical people or strangers into our house, he just would not have it, (germs)
Thank you for trying to help me.
N

allen35

Hope everything works out and he continues to improve and don't forget overtired there is one person you are forgetting here:

YOU


Take care and look after yourself

Mrs_Arcanum

The only thing I can add is based on a colleagues recent encounter with the DWP in court; is where they claim the decision will affect England & Wales (not just wherever you are regardless).

overtired

Hi
I am alright when he is alright.
For better or for worse, he has always looked after me, now it is my turn.
Thank you
N

overtired

My letters are form DWP Blackpool, and I live in North West England.
Thank you
N

hippygran

Hi again overtired

In our case it only took about 4 months, but this was about 4 years ago (he was awarded indefinitely), and I expect that like everything it takes even longer nowadays.

I feel that you are taking everything just on your own shoulders, so really feel you should now try and reach out for some help, if not for your husband, just for yourself.

Although you may think you don't need help personally, caring for anyone 24 hours a day is very draining. I only have to cope with caring for a physical disability, and god knows even this is very stressful.

A mental disability can be much harder, as you have the unpredictability to contend with too, and your husband is unable to give you the emotional support you need, and deserve!

When I reach the end of my tether, my husband can and does 'rally' round by trying to lighten the mood, making me laugh, saying hes sorry if his been ratty, being a bit sloppy etc. All the things that cheer me up a little, that your husband can't currently give you.

Ask your GP for referral to a CPN (they will know how to deal with the mental health issue, so it doesn't 'feed' your husband's fears). I have very limited knowledge about mental health issues, but have just contacted an acquaintance (who it must be said who is young, and a fairly recently qualified mental health nurse, so she doesn't profess to yet be an 'expert'!).

She also said that the hospital who cared for your husband may be able to advise.

Is there a carers support group in your area? They may be able to help/advise - not just now, but in the future.

Your LHA will also have a vulnerable adult department attached to their Social Services that you could contact. Generally I have not always found social services much cop, but when I contacted the vulnerable adults department about my dad, who has vascular dementia, they were (to my surprise), really good! I think your husband would come into the category of a vulnerable adult.

It sounds like you will have time to prepare for a tribunal, (and also that this could be done at your home - which I wasn't aware of) so maybe in the meantime some professional help could help both you and your husband to prepare?

I will keep on thinking, and ask around, and if anything else which may help comes up I will let you know.

Love
Hippy

overtired

Thank you Hippy
I will indeed contact the hospital, he was admitted to 4 years ago, he had help when he was first released, but the (woman in the day center, said something to him and he absolutley freaked out) to this day I do not know what she said to him, but we had to get rid of all his clothes, shoes, and coat.
So he would not let anyone into our home in case they said anything to him, when he was really in the midst of this illness, he were throwing furniture away, the last time he did this was when he had to go for a medical for DWP, the Doctor said that he should not be put through this, but there was nothing he could do about it.
At one time or another(more often when he was on medication) he has thrown vertually every bit of furniture away, I cannot have DVDs Cds or anything like that in the house, in case they have something in them that might upset him, (if a actor or singer says something on TV that upsets him, then we can no longer have any film or CD of theirs in the house) it got very upsetting to see him frantically looking through things, so it was just easier to just throw them away.
Thank you for your time and concern.
N