legal seperation

blushingbride_3

I am not sure it is the same as this as my solicitor also talked about this but as a seperate path to take. but thanks for the info

blushingbride_3

from looking more at this webpage i think it is a seperation agreement my solicitor was talking about, which is quicker than a divorce once financial details are sorted & we just both agree & sign it

euronorris

I know you didn't ask for advice on what to do, but seeing as he is refusing to leave until you do something legally to make him and this could take a while still, it might be worth asking him if he could stay at a friends house for a couple weeks. It could give you both the breathing room you need to calm down and then work on the problems when you're both in a more calm/rational place.

I would ask about Relate again. He thinks it won't work, so what's the harm in trying? Especially as you're heading for divorce now anyway. Couldn't exactly make things worse, could it?

blushingbride_3

I know i have asked many times he just says he doesnt need help, i am hoping that once he is on his own he will have time to realise what has happened, if not its his loss but at least i have tried & not just walked away.
Please dont think this is just a emotional rash decision this has been going on for nearly a year now.
He is too proud to go stay with a friend, he's hardly around anyways because he works nights but i'd just rather know i have my own space for a bit to work things out

euronorris

But you're not saying that he needs help, you're saying that your relationship needs help. It's not about laying blame at anyone's door, it's about working together to find a way through the issues. Currently, you are unable to do that, so if he won't try Relate, then the result is divorce. Is that really what he wants? Have you laid it out to him as clearly as that?

I don't think you're being rash, just trying to suggest things to try as I know that sometimes other people can be good at suggesting things I hadn't thought of.

If he won't go to a friends, would he consider renting an apartment for a couple weeks, or taking a holiday alone? Would you? (I know it's your house, but a break would probably do you good right now).