Contrary child driving me nuts

KiKi

Ignore it! I know it's annoying, but why argue? She's only three, she probably thinks it's hilarious and she knows it annoys you!

I have a male friend who treats his two very young children (3 and 5) like they're adults, he expects them to be rational and he likes to be right. So if they get something wrong he constantly corrects them and has the most strained relationship with them which is so unnecessary. It's such a shame because he doesn't just enjoy them.

I'm not saying you're doing that at all, but just play along, have fun or don't give a reaction. The only reason it's challenging and argumentative is because you want to be right - but you don't need to be right on the little things like the weather. Pick your battles!

(Plus, she'll grow out of it and you'll get to more annoying phases!)

KiKi

FunnySaving

sassyblue wrote: »

Easy to say when you probably don't experience this day in, day out. Show me a mother who's never got fed up with her child(ren) at some point and l'll show you a liar.

Nobody is a saint!

I think you have misunderstood my post - I'm not saying that it won't be annoying at some point, but it sounds as though the OP is taking it personally and is avoiding interacting with her child because of it, which is a shame. If she can focus on the fact that it's actually a phase of her daughter's development which is teaching her about how to hold a conversation, rather than being annoyed that her daughter is being 'contrary' then they will both be better off.

Agutka

My son likes the "where do ... come from". Thankfully "from a factory" is a satisfactory response. If I actually go into any sort of detail, he gets bored pronto. A good tickle sorts out any more questions.

Can't wait for the why stage :eek:

crutches

Agutka....Where do babies come from ????...
That will confuse his friends in the playground!

balletshoes

strawberrypud wrote: »

Does anyone know how to handle a contrary 3 year old? She'll argue that black is white. For example if I say "It's a lovely sunny morning" She'll say "No, it's raining!", that sort of thing. It feels like 90% of our communication is this argumentative challenging behaviour and it puts me off saying anything to her knowing I'll just get an annoying response.

She thinks it is funny and I try to just ignore it and distract her to something else.

What can I do?

I'd think it was amusing too - then I'd just say "okay dear" to whatever she said and keep up my half of whatever conversation we're having.
When my DD was younger, I used to burst out laughing at times at what she said - and occasionally if we were attempting to have a serious discussion I'd have to rush to another room to have a chuckle then come back and resume what we were doing.

Agutka

crutches wrote: »

Agutka....Where do babies come from ????...
That will confuse his friends in the playground!

Oh no, he's quite sure he came from a chocolate factory (his idea not mine). He should know Mummy made his baby brother but he completely ignored my pregnancy.
Okay, not everything comes from a factory, like people or trees, and lots of stuff is "built by people", I do have to think about things sometimes

mwa

My DD who is now 4 went through this stage (and still does some days) so I can understand your frustration!! It will pass, like someone else said it may be worth instead of asking direct questions to try to engage in a general conversation to distract her from this annoying behaviour 'wow what a lovely sunny day, what do you like about sunny days?' for example

ellay864

When you've got to the teenage grunting stage you'll be glad just to hear any actual words coming out their mouths!

ailuro2

So she knows her opposites then...:D

I used to love those surreal conversations me and DD had when she was that age....

and the "why" conversations could go on a long time, but I always thought it was a great way to teach her stuff... so 9 years on she still isn't scared to ask a question, but she already knows WHY the sky is blue WHY she needs a seatbelt WHY we need to go shopping...

I agree with asking for her to give you an opinion in "what" it is outside, whether you can go to the park or nit if it is raining, have conversations about how she can tell if it is time to get up or time to go to bed. Listen to what she says and she might stop being so contrary....

or not, of course!!:rotfl:

Becles

I just say stupid things back. If she looked out the window and said it was raining when it was sunny, I would make out I could see a giraffe flying past :rotfl:

It's a good job nobody can hear what goes on in our house

My daughter is at the why stage too, and I random questions like "are dogs made in factories?" :rotfl: I normally keep answering those as best I can and she gives in first