Advice about Wills and step children please.

moralissue

Hi I have been married to my husband for 25 years. We have 2 children together and he has 2 children from his first marriage. He was divorced when I met him so there has never been any issues with his ex wife or children.

His 2 children from his previous marriage are both married and have children of their own and are settled financially.

Our 2 children still live at home.




Anyway to get tot he point we went to re do our wills and our wishes are:

• That we leave everything to each other.
• If we die together we wanted to leave a 'set' amount to his children from his previous marriage and then leave all the rest joint between our 2 children plus our possesions be sorted and decided between our 2 children.
• The reasons for this is that his children are financially well off and also because they will also inherit their mums money. My husband has already given any heirlooms he wants his previous children to have so any heirlooms we have together will be for our 2 children.

However the solicitor told us not to do this as it gets complicated and we should just say that everything be split between all survivng children equally? He said if we did it the way we wanted to then we are open to the will be contested etc?

We didn't argue the point as he is the 'expert' but we said we wanted time to think about it.

I hope our choices don't offend anyone but has anyone been in a similar situation as in this day an age there are many step families and it must cause comlications for others too?

Should we seek another opinion

brians_daughter

Personally i would ask else where.. even if it does become complex its your wishes at the end of the day, and you are paying for a service to ensure they are met.

On a side note do the children know your plans? Whilst i see the common sense in your thinking i am not sure in grief i would be so clear in my thoughts? My thinkng is if they know whats coming (so to speak) it will cause less (if any) friction between the 4 siblings?.. This board is full of posts from grieveing people who feel 'hard done to' in wills etc, hence why my children know our wishes and the reasoning behind what may seem an unequal share of our assets.

Do bear in mind the mother of your step children could decide to leave all her money to the cats home if she saw fit.. so therefore your step children wouldnt inherit from her as you assume? Sorry for devils advocate but it happens every day, and unfortunately we see it on here a lot x

moralissue

Thanks for your advice, yes we have discussed it with them and they are fine about it. Yes you are right their mum could change her mind in her old age and leave it to a cats home but I suppose there is a chance of us all going doo lally in our old age and doing the same so our plans may change too as we get old and dotty

thorsoak

I see no reason why you cannot leave a set amount to your husband's children and the remainder to your children - and add a letter specifying why this is so. The only problem that might arise is if you had to sell your property to go into care, thus diminishing the "remainder" available to your children - because a set bequest has a primary call on an estate. If that situation were to arise, then you might have to rethink the wills.

Mojisola

Ditch the solicitor. You know what you want to do, have discussed it with the family and he should be helping you put your wishes into the right legal wording - not changing your mind for you!

How old are the children living at home? If they are still being financially supported by you, they have a prior claim on anything you leave and that be accounted for.

Be wary of leaving a set sum to the other children. You don't know what your estate will be when you die and you could leave the second pair of children with nothing. It's better to work in percentages.

To do a "belts and braces" job on the will, you could write a letter to be kept with the will explaining why you have made the split in the way you have.

whatatwit

As thorsoak has mentioned, a specific bequest takes priority, so maybe you would be better doing it in shares.
Your stepchildren could receive 10% each and your children 40% each of the residue of the estate.

Also, depending upon the amounts and inflation, the set sums could be in effect worthless if the wills hadn't been updated for a while.

RAS

Hi

Do have a look at the latest programme on wills on TV. I do think you need a will and I think you may need to have another will in years to come, if youer situation changes

Several things that your solicitor has not pointed out.

I am going to assume that your joint estate is half a million for ease.

1. If the first to go needs a nursing home at the end of their life, then the cost of this may have to be paid out of the estate (local Authority charge on the house).
2. The survivor may also need care towards the end of their life, which may require the sale of the house.

You write a will now leaving a set amount (say 100K) to each of the older children and the rest divided between the younger children.

Right now, that means the older children get £100K each and the younger ones get £150K each.

In 15 years time it could mean that the older children get £100K each and younger ones get half of (£300K minus one or two lots of nursing home fees)= say £50k each.

Is that what you intend?

The other factor that I regard as relevant is the background. If OH was a wealthy business man when he split from his ex, you have only work PT and both sets of children were brought up in the similiar circumstances, then treat them equally. If he was on a low income. married you, you supported him in improving his career prospects and have always worked FT, then the children of the second marriage might be entitled to benefit from both parents hard work.

I think may be you need a different solicitor?

moralissue

Thanks for the advice so far.

That's good advice re percentages rather than 'set' amounts.

I agree that there may come a time that the wills might need to be updated if life goes to 'plan' that way.

My husband and I started off with nothing financially so everything we have we have worked hard for together.

Obviously the solicitor didn't want to get into the complications and was hoping we'd agree to a simple straightforward Will? However what is the point of wills if you cannot specify your exact wishes? Seriously, what if we didn't want any money to go to any of our children? Surely that would be our perrogative and they shouldn't be able to contest it? Bizzare if someone is of sound mind and they make a will and then their wishes can be overturned if its taken to court.

Inheritance shouldn't be a god given right to any children it should be the individuals choice where to leave money to.

Makes you wonder whats the point of wills unless they are so called 'straight forward' because if you write a will that veers off the 'norm' then it is subject to contesting....

Savvy_Sue

Go to a STEP solicitor, and make a complaint about this one if you have the inclination.

moralissue

Thanks Savvy Sue I will have a look at the link.

moralissue

I think what we will do is (using the advice from this thread) is write an exact list and insist that our wishes are granted even if it means harder work for the solicitor, we are paying after all..

But having a strict list that we don't want to veer from written down might help so, so far:

• Everything left to each other. (I'm assuming that children can't contest it that they should get something before both parents have died? ie they can't contest a will if we want the full amount left to the surviving wife/husband? Not that I am thinking they will but this solicitor has really got me thinking!).

• If we die together then certain percentages of estate (house/cash etc) for each child.

• All possessions to be divided between our 2 children.

Do you think I need to add other clauses?