Divorce question

newyearnewstart_2

Sorry if this has been asked before, i've had a look on the net and can't find the answer....

My ex and I split 18 months ago and are now looking to get a divorce, we are on speaking terms, we have nothing joint any more - this has all been sorted.

My question is can both of us sign the divorce papers before taking them to the courts. Or do I need to sign them first, submit them, him sign them and then they get returned to the courts?

Thanks

mrs_marty

My solicitor handled it all for me if i mind correctly I had papers drawn up as it was under two years so still needed his signature or acknowledgement then it went back to court and that was it x

skylight

If you are in complete agreement over everything then have a look at DIY divorce on google. There are lots of companies who can supply the forms and the information you need, from the divorce papers to the clean break agreements. Fees are reasonable but remember that you need to add the court fees to these costs too.

newyearnewstart_2

skylight wrote: »

If you are in complete agreement over everything then have a look at DIY divorce on google. There are lots of companies who can supply the forms and the information you need, from the divorce papers to the clean break agreements. Fees are reasonable but remember that you need to add the court fees to these costs too.

I've got all the paper work already, we are doing it DIY

Problem is it doesn't state if we can both sign it at the same time, the guide indicates that I have to sign it first, send it off, for it to be sent to him and then back to the court. which just sound like a waste of time to me!

galvanizersbaby

newyearnewstart wrote: »

I've got all the paper work already, we are doing it DIY

Problem is it doesn't state if we can both sign it at the same time, the guide indicates that I have to sign it first, send it off, for it to be sent to him and then back to the court. which just sound like a waste of time to me!

Hi

I think the thing is that no matter how amicable your split is - someone has to be the petitioner and the other party the respondent - if you sign and send the paper work off the court will likely contact your husband with the paperwork and any questions if relevant.

HTH

LittleMrsThrifty

newyearnewstart wrote: »

I've got all the paper work already, we are doing it DIY

Problem is it doesn't state if we can both sign it at the same time, the guide indicates that I have to sign it first, send it off, for it to be sent to him and then back to the court. which just sound like a waste of time to me!

This is correct.

skylight

Ditto - just been off this afternoon to sign mine! They are sent to the court, onto the ex who is supposed to sign and send them back to the court who sends them back to my solicitor.

newyearnewstart_2

Thanks guys!

They don't make things easy do they :rotfl:

mookiandco

I have posted this a couple of times before but this is the general procedure. You will presumably be basing the divorce on his unreasonable behaviour as you haven't been separated for 2 years (the procedure is the same as for 2 years though you do not need his consent).

The tricky bit for you will be drafting the particulars setting out what the unreasonable behaviour was. It should be in the format of: On xxxx(insert approximate date (month and year are fine)) the Respondent xxxxxxx(whatever the behaviour was). This caused the Petitioner to feel distressed/isolated/upset/anxious for the future of the marriage/come to the conclusion that the marriage had broken down (delete as appropriate).

You should list about 7 incidents that are indicative of his unreasonable behaviour and put them in paragraphs. You can use mild allegations of behaviour (such as we did not communicate/he ignored me/he would argue about petty things/he came home late every night/he was financially irresponsible/he did not give you any affection and can even agree them with him but you need to pad it out a bit to ensure that the Court is persuaded that the marriage has broken down. Make sure you say how each behaviour made you feel because the test for whether the behaviour was so unreasonable you couldn't be expected to remain in the marriage is subjective.

NB: at step 3) and again at step 16) complete fee remission form if you are eligible not to pay the fees):

1) Read leaflets on HMCS website e.g I want a divorce what do I do etc

2) Complete Divorce Petition http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/c...ms/d8_0405.pdf
(Use D8 Notes for guidance as a step by step guide http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/c...notes_0405.pdf . Ensure you use the correct wording and provide the correct information. If you get it wrong then you will cause huge delays and end up spending more money putting it right.
If you have children complete Statement of Arrangements form http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/c...s/d8a_1205.pdf .

3) Sign the divorce petition and date it.

4) Make 3 copies of the divorce petition. Keep one for your records. Take 2 copies and the original to the court with your original marriage certificate and £340 cheque or cash.

5) Wait forever for court to issue it (usually a couple of weeks they wont do it there and then).

6) receive notice of issue from the court which confirms they have sent it to your ex.

7) Ex has 7 days (but you should give it 14 days before checking with the court) to return acknowledgement of service form to the court. As it is on 2 years seperation he MUST return this as it requires him to say that he agrees that you have been seperated for 2yrs. If he fails to return this you may have to change the fact you relied on. Again alot of time and money will be wasted if this happens. Even then if he fails to return it you will have to prove he has received it (usually through bailiff service) before the divorce can move on.

8) If acknowledgment of service is returned to court, the court will send it to you together with affidavit to complete (its mainly just yes or no questions e.g do you agree everythingn your divorce petition is correct etc. Take this to court and swear it (or to a solicitors firm where it will cost £5.00). You must attach the acknowledgement of service form and mark it 'Exhibit A'.

9) copy your affidavit for your records. Complete and sign application for Special procedure trial sent to you by the Court but also here http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/c...s/d84_1298.pdf (basically where a divorce is uncontested you are applying for the court to grant decree nisi).

10) Take both above documents to court.

11) Wait endlessly for court to process above documents.

12) Receive document from court which gives you a date for Decree Nisi (usually about a month later)

13) receive Decree Nisi a few days after the date provided for in 12) above

14) Get your calendar out and mark 6 weeks and 1 day later in it

15) give consideration to whether you want a Consent Order for a Clean break (see a solicitor if unsure).

16) 6 weeks and 1 day later complete application for Decree Absolute http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/c...s/d36_1205.pdf and give it to the court with £45.

17) Twiddle your thumbs a bit and put the champagne on ice.

18) Kiss the postman when he delivers your Decree Absolute!

19) Frame a copy but make sure you keep original in a safe place in case you decide to marry again!!

20) Party Time!!

newyearnewstart_2

mookiandco wrote: »

I have posted this a couple of times before but this is the general procedure. You will presumably be basing the divorce on his unreasonable behaviour as you haven't been separated for 2 years (the procedure is the same as for 2 years though you do not need his consent).

The tricky bit for you will be drafting the particulars setting out what the unreasonable behaviour was. It should be in the format of: On xxxx(insert approximate date (month and year are fine)) the Respondent xxxxxxx(whatever the behaviour was). This caused the Petitioner to feel distressed/isolated/upset/anxious for the future of the marriage/come to the conclusion that the marriage had broken down (delete as appropriate).

You should list about 7 incidents that are indicative of his unreasonable behaviour and put them in paragraphs. You can use mild allegations of behaviour (such as we did not communicate/he ignored me/he would argue about petty things/he came home late every night/he was financially irresponsible/he did not give you any affection and can even agree them with him but you need to pad it out a bit to ensure that the Court is persuaded that the marriage has broken down. Make sure you say how each behaviour made you feel because the test for whether the behaviour was so unreasonable you couldn't be expected to remain in the marriage is subjective.

NB: at step 3) and again at step 16) complete fee remission form if you are eligible not to pay the fees):

1) Read leaflets on HMCS website e.g I want a divorce what do I do etc

2) Complete Divorce Petition
(Use D8 Notes for guidance as a step by step guide . Ensure you use the correct wording and provide the correct information. If you get it wrong then you will cause huge delays and end up spending more money putting it right.
If you have children complete Statement of Arrangements form .

3) Sign the divorce petition and date it.

4) Make 3 copies of the divorce petition. Keep one for your records. Take 2 copies and the original to the court with your original marriage certificate and £340 cheque or cash.

5) Wait forever for court to issue it (usually a couple of weeks they wont do it there and then).

6) receive notice of issue from the court which confirms they have sent it to your ex.

7) Ex has 7 days (but you should give it 14 days before checking with the court) to return acknowledgement of service form to the court. As it is on 2 years seperation he MUST return this as it requires him to say that he agrees that you have been seperated for 2yrs. If he fails to return this you may have to change the fact you relied on. Again alot of time and money will be wasted if this happens. Even then if he fails to return it you will have to prove he has received it (usually through bailiff service) before the divorce can move on.

8) If acknowledgment of service is returned to court, the court will send it to you together with affidavit to complete (its mainly just yes or no questions e.g do you agree everythingn your divorce petition is correct etc. Take this to court and swear it (or to a solicitors firm where it will cost £5.00). You must attach the acknowledgement of service form and mark it 'Exhibit A'.

9) copy your affidavit for your records. Complete and sign application for Special procedure trial sent to you by the Court but also here (basically where a divorce is uncontested you are applying for the court to grant decree nisi).

10) Take both above documents to court.

11) Wait endlessly for court to process above documents.

12) Receive document from court which gives you a date for Decree Nisi (usually about a month later)

13) receive Decree Nisi a few days after the date provided for in 12) above

14) Get your calendar out and mark 6 weeks and 1 day later in it

15) give consideration to whether you want a Consent Order for a Clean break (see a solicitor if unsure).

16) 6 weeks and 1 day later complete application for Decree Absolute and give it to the court with £45.

17) Twiddle your thumbs a bit and put the champagne on ice.

18) Kiss the postman when he delivers your Decree Absolute!

19) Frame a copy but make sure you keep original in a safe place in case you decide to marry again!!

20) Party Time!!

Phew! that was a lot.....

ok two questions

1. we separated due to adultery on his part - do I *have* to name the other party

2. I don't have a forwarding address for him, and he is not happy to give me one (something to do with the person he left me for turning out to be a right psycho b1tch....:rotfl:) but he is willing to meet and sign paper work, hence my original question. Do I *need* an address to proceed?

mookiandco

Yes you need an address to proceed. The court will not issue the divorce petition without one. He can give you any address although you have to state that he resides at that address on the divorce petition. It is not possible to get around this.

With regards to the adultery you are better off not naming the other party unless you are seeking that they pay your legal costs (very unusual for the court to make such an order but they can do so). If you are doing it on adultery he will need to be okay with this otherwise he might refuse to sign the acknowledgement of service form. If you do it on adultery and he won't admit it/sign the acknowledgement of service then you will be in difficulty because you will need to prove he committed adultery and usually the only definitive proof the court will accept is the birth of a child.

If you think he won't admit it/sign acknowledgement of service then you are better off doing it on unreasonable behaviour in which you can state that you believe that he had an extra-marital relationship.