My Autistic Son - Help!

Dainty1976

I have been told by a friend that it may be possible to get my son signed off from school for stress by the GP.

Does anyone know if this is true?

A bit of background - he is 5, attends a mainstream school and request for a Statutory Assessment is being done this coming week. He is diagnosed with Classic Autism, HMS, Dyspraxia (gross and fine) and SPD. He has massive sensory issues and finds the whole school environment extremely traumatic. Following a recent in-school assessment, his Clin Psych has written a report stating that school is "daily torture" for him. This is evidenced amongst other things by his behaviour which is worsening by the day. He is hitting, kicking, biting, pushing and spitting at other kids and staff every day. He is also hurting himself intentionally and non-intentionally, during a tantrum at school on Thursday he hit his lip on a bench and split it open because they couldn't contain him! He constantly runs out of class and refuses to go in in the morning, physically fighting with me not to go into the classroom. He constantly complains of Head/tummy ache (which I know is a par for the course with ASD kids) but has now started having nosebleeds on top of the daily self induced vomiting that he does. He comes home and just perches on the arm of the sofa rocking back and forth, dribbling and biting his hands for about 2 hours before I can get anything out of him apart from trying to keep him from hurting himself or attacking my DD who is only 2yrs old. - I'm not going into more detail as I feel I could write a book on him (and maybe bore you all at the same time).

I'm a tough cookie but its bringing me to tears on a near daily basis now. The cClin Psych has said that she thinks he should be home schooled with an outsourced tutor whilst Assessment/Statement is pending but I dont think the school will agree with this. She also said that she cannot suggest it to the school in an upcoming meeting this Thursday and that I will have to ask myself. TBH I'm scared to ask since the school seem to want to keep him in (I have already asked for reduced timetable and got a firm NO in response).

He didnt used to be like this before he started school. He is a loving and gentle child who is turning into a monster at the hands of mainstream education. BTW I took it upon myself to refuse to take him to school on Friday and did tell the school that he is too stressed and needs a break! I feel at my wits end! If he were an adult in employment he'd have been fired and medicated or even arrested by now so why should I have to put him through this on a daily basis just to satsify attendance figures and the rules!

Please help!

DomRavioli

It is a possibility, but it is unlikely. Speak with Social Services, as it is their duty to provide care when it is required, and this includes schooling. They are likely to do an assessment, and see what, if any, care requirements he has. There is a large waiting list to get him either a TA or into a school which has specialist care, but the likelyhood is that any home schooling will have to be paid by yourselves, with the local authority's say so, and without that, it will be recorded that he is not attending. I suggest you ask the school and give them the Psych's direct line for information, as all requests have to be followed.

Savvy_Sue

IPSEA, quick.

devizes18193

Yes you should be able to take him off for stress . It cant hurt to ask after all .
Have you considerd home educating him your self , have a look at http://www.education-otherwise.org/
We taught my son and daughter whom have me and asd respectively.
We found it was not always an easy road and expense wise you on you own for example . but its an option

soupdragon10

Home schooling is an option, however you would then find access to some specialist services which are provided via the Local Education Authority aren't available to you.

I am stunned that the school are not being more helpful - I've worked in schools quite a bit, and have worked with young people who are on a very reduced timetable (some only 2 hours per day) because they cannot cope with the stresses of being in the classroom.

Can I suggest that you take someone with you to the meeting - do you have a local Parent Partnership group where you are, as they are great at helping with situations such as this. Here is their national link so you can see if they are near you. http://www.parentpartnership.org.uk

Make a note of the points that you want to bring up at the meeting, as it's easy to forget in the heat of the moment what you want answered.

If your child is being made ill by being in school then I don't see why he can't have a doctors note to this effect. It would certainly strengthen your case for specialist schooling for your son. Don't despair, there are people and organisations out there that can support you.

starnight_2

I'm more surprised the Clin Psych can't help you out. I know CAHMS helped my son out by having a meeting with the school to see what they could do to reduce stress levels. Speak to the school ans as someone said take in notes with you. It ,may well be they want this meeting to discuss options with you.

SingleSue

Reduced hours worked for my youngest son but then he went to a school who were trying everything to keep him in mainstream...including sending all the teaching and support staff off on courses on how to deal with complex autism (youngest is complex autistic which can present different challenges compared to classic autism).

He didn't actually go full time school until he was in year 6.

Also other methods they used to try to reduce stress was for him to arrive early and spend time with the headteacher before the other students arrived (I would drop him off at 8.30 instead of 8.55) and to be picked up early (2.30 instead of 3pm), so he avoided the rush of bodies in the playground and classes at the start and end of the day.

They also provided a special area for him where he could go using his break cards when things were getting too much...unfortunately, he didn't like the designated area and preferred a stock cupboard, so they made it "xxxx cupboard" instead. In the cupboard, he had little things to twiddle with, notepaper for him to scribble on and calming music could also be played if he wanted it to....also soft cushions and bean bag if he wanted to lay down to chill.

That school now has, courtesy of what they had to put into place for youngest, a special needs area with provision for calming rooms, arriving early and having breakfast etc away from the other children....what they call his legacy is now benefitting other children in our area.

I will be forever thankful to that school for what they did for him...his first primary school was an absolute nightmare who completely ignored the recommendations from the pre school advisory teacher and he became a non verbal (when we had only just got his speech going), screaming, tantruming monster.

Now he is in high school, it is presenting different challenges...he is main stream but with a very high level of support, from the school staff and from the outreach service and he is just about managing to cope with it all. The teachers there are also about to embark on the same course the junior teachers went on so they can understand the differences that complex autism present and just what makes him tick, they also allow him to enter school by the main front door instead of the student door...so again, avoiding the crush from all the students.

He also has a dinner pass, which means he can avoid the hustle and bustle in the dinner queue and just collect his food and the provision of the support area where he can go if things are getting on top of him...plus of course, lots of TA support.

Hope you get things sorted but personally, I would firstly try discussing things with the head teacher and if that doesn't work, trying the LEA with support of the consultant who deals with your child...that was what worked for me in the end!

Dainty1976

Thank you all for your comments so far!

I have tried IPSEA but its constantly engaged - will try again tomorrow. Also, contacted NAS Education Advice line who sent me some good info re "flexi-time schooling". Am going in there on Thursday with a few good ideas thanks to you all!

If anyone has any further advice up their sleeve it'll be warmyl received!

THANK YOU!

funphil10

Hi. I have just been through this with my autistic son. Yes it is possible for your GP to sign your son off school. The correct term needed to be used is reactive depression. My GP wrote to the school and did a copy which i sent to County. They then have a legal obligation to give your son an education. I had teachers coming to my house twice a week paid by the local authority. He was classed off school on medical grounds with this diagnosis. I have just got funding for him to go to a special provision school out of county. Be strong and fight for what your son needs and is entitled to. Good luck.

Dainty1976

Thank you funphil10 - will take those words to the doc later this week. Great first post!

Dainty1976

Oh - just wanted to ask a few questions to Phil.

was this pre/post or during assessment for statement?
Did it speed things up at all re: getting him into special provision?
Were you required to adhere to some sort of curriculum yourself on top of the tutors?
Do you think it helped towards a satement/special provision?
How long did he have home schooling for/did the doc sign him off for?
Did his mainstream school react badly to it?