Taking early retirement to clear debts?

rose28454

Hi
Things have moved along since last post. OH retired on Tuesday and Pension lump sum appeared in account today. (45K) He actually left work about ten days ago and has been on a training course ( telehandler operator ) paid for by the post office (£1000) Although he may only use this as a skill for part time work at least he has done it. He has been for a couple of job interviews and is hopeful he will get one as a steward at our local Private school. It will be school hours with some weekends. It will mean we will actually be slightly better off than before and some of the mortgage will be paid aswell. He has had a couple of binge weekends in the last few weeks but on Sunday after a heavy Friday and Saturday he was so unwell with extremely high blood pressure that he had to go to hospital. He pretended it was because he had been eating fatty foods on his course but I told the nurse about the drinking when she noticed the cuts on his wrists. She then spoke to him and he has since seen our doctor and been to AA and I am hopeful he will at least keep the drinking in check if not give up altogether.
There will be another 9K paid in on Friday for the redunancy part of the deal and we will then pay off part of the mortgages and decide which way to go with the rest. I am looking at Savings accounts where we can put it as the mortgage cant be paid for 6 weeks due to being on a fixed rate till then.
I am hopeful that we can work things out and when our son leaves home in 4 weeks we will be on our own and am going to make one of the rooms into an office so I can develop my bookkeeping and E-Bay businesses. Also I have opened a new joint account for all the household bills and have suggested that we have sole accounts aswell and pay a set amount in each month for the household bills and then have our own accounts aswell. That way I wont be stressed about his drinking money as I wont know how much he is spending if he goes down that route again. I think maybe this way may be better for both of us. Thanks for everybodys advice.

EdInvestor

That's excellent news Rose I do hope it works out well for you both.

seven-day-weekend

Sounds good Rose, let hope things continue to improve for you both.

tanith

Rose so glad that you came back with your update and that you are making plans... its good to hear such a positive post from someone who was so confused and down just 2 or 3 months ago.. it all sounds like you and hubby are getting things sorted and I hope you both carry on in that vein...

good luck....

Jake'sGran

I am extremely sorry to read about your problems and think you have done well to cope so far. Do you really need a new kitchen at this stage of the game? I would pay off as much of your debt as you can with option 2. My sister has a severe alcohol problem. She lives in Australia and I know I will never see her again. Fortunately her husband did well in business so there have never been any financial problems. Alcoholism is an illness but one that's hard to beat and spouses/family can't affect the behaviour of the person concerned. I would worry more about your daughter's illness.

For me clearing debt would be a priority because of what might happen in the future. I really do hope you come to a time when you can relax and not have all this worry. NB Edinvestor has given some very wise advice.

rose28454

Good news He got the new job he went for and starts on Monday. This will help as we will be better off financially and we will have paid off some of our debt. I have had a re-think re the kitchen and we are just going to replace doors etc and do it up instead. I am just about to measure the kitchen doors and order some from the B & Q offer. Hubby admitted to me that he needs to be working to keep him out of the pub!! .He also said he will take overtime if offered to keep busy. I am hoping this is a fresh start for us. Will keep you posted.

EdInvestor

rose28454 wrote:

Hubby admitted to me that he needs to be working to keep him out of the pub!! .He also said he will take overtime if offered to keep busy.

Now that's definitely an advance :T

I've noticed that alcohol problems and depression often go together - has hubby been depressed about the problems in his old job do you think? If so, you may find that a new more positive one will enable him to make advances in more ways than one.

Good luck, let's hope your patience pays off.

rose28454

Hi
Yes I definitly think the depression and job go hand in hand. He has been drinking heavily all week, today he is at the pub, but has promised he will stop tommorow and get help as he is starting work again on Monday. I know he is very down about the fact that they did not even hace a collection or get him a card. He met one of his colleaugues this morning and he did not even know he had retired and said it was disgusting that they did not have a collection. Despite all the drinking OH is basically a good man but needs help. After last weeks hospital trip I am trying to persuade him to maybe come off the anti depressents as I think they are not helping as they should Our son has had a couple of rows with him this week and I just say to leave him for now and see what Sunday brings. The money has arrived in our account but as he has been drunk all week he is unaware of that fact. I am hoping Monday will bring a change but unfortunatly I have to away tommorow for 2 days working but I have realised that I cannot stop him doing what he wants. I just need to safeguard the money and my home. I am still full of hope. It is a lovely day so who cares!!!
Thanks