Buying our first house - Would you wait?

ViolaLass

kford224 wrote: »

I don't think we need to waste a few months of house deposit savings in order to know whether we want to live together or not. Renting is dead money, and if you feel you need to do that before buying, then surely the relationship is already a bit shakey?!

The point is that living together is different to just being in a relationship. Renting is no more dead money than the interest on a mortgage.

quantic

ViolaLass wrote: »

The point is that living together is different to just being in a relationship. Renting is no more dead money than the interest on a mortgage.

I had never lived with my partner before buying and it certainly has been testing to say the least at times, but if you have a strong enough relationship you figure it all out.

danielley

I dont think there is any harm in viewing properties prior to having all of you deposit in place, but be prepared not be allowed to make an offer.

Also, make sure you have about £5k in cash spare for the extras Solicitors, Surveys, Stamp Duty, Mortgage Product fee etc. It is depressing how it all adds up, but if you get the right house now, then you wont have these expenses again for a long time.

Please also dont worry about having borrowed or second hand furniture in the short term. I remember moving in to my first ever place with just sun loungers (very comfy they were) The elation I felt when I eventually got a grubby second hand sofa for £50 was amazing! And then finally when I got a brand new sofa, I felt like I had won the lottery!

As you already know from your deposit, saving up for something you really want is extremely rewarding.

LudaMusser

I started looking at the housing market in July 2010 and bought a house at the end of January this year. You need to keep a close eye on the property market because if you don`t keep yourself up to speed you won`t know which houses are priced well and which are over-priced. I used to go on RightMove so much, every other day for hours. I would search thru 70+ pages at a time so I knew exactly which houses were over-priced. Also have a look on nethouseprices so you can find out what the house was bought for.
I see no harm in viewing properties as you will learn what to look out for i.e cracks in walls, damp etc. Always have a look or drive past at night so you can see what the parking situation is like when ppl are home. I must have viewed about ten houses before I found the one. You know within seconds whether it`s the right house or not. StreetView is an awesome tool too, what looks like a nice house may infact have an off licence three doors down

ViolaLass

quantic wrote: »

I had never lived with my partner before buying and it certainly has been testing to say the least at times, but if you have a strong enough relationship you figure it all out.

I'm not saying it won't work - living with your partner first is no guarantee that it will work either - but if the relationship falls apart over things that would have been apparent if you had lived together first, you'll have avoided tying yourselves together in a way that can be a complete pain to undo.

Deciding not to do this because 'renting is dead money' is not a good reason, IMO. The interest on your mortgage is just as dead as your rent.

Eton_Rifle

B_Blank wrote: »

Buying a house with a boyfriend/girlfriend is a terrible idea. You will probably split up and then be in a complete mess with the property

Who should you buy with then?
Your mum?

kford224

ViolaLass wrote: »

I'm not saying it won't work - living with your partner first is no guarantee that it will work either - but if the relationship falls apart over things that would have been apparent if you had lived together first, you'll have avoided tying yourselves together in a way that can be a complete pain to undo.

Deciding not to do this because 'renting is dead money' is not a good reason, IMO. The interest on your mortgage is just as dead as your rent.

I see what you're saying, but then how or why would you save for a house with someone you're very much in love with and it be a case of "It's great we are on our way to getting a desposit for our own house together, but why don't we spend some of that money lining someone elses pocket just to double check that it will work?" I think I would be a bit insulted! I suppose it is similar to the schools of thought on pre-nups. I personally don't think you need to full-on live with someone to know whether it would work. Spending loads of time together generally/holidays and the like helps you determine things like that.

It reminds me of a Ricki Lake show aaaages ago actually.....There were couples on there who were all engaged and the men all had crushes on other women. They were saying to their fiance that if they let them sleep with the woman and they didn't fall for them, then it proved that they (the engaged couple) were meant to be together!?! Barmy!! Surely the fact that they want to do 'the test' in the first place puts doubts on the relationship! (Not a direct comparison to the renting thing obviously, it just reminded me of it! )

ViolaLass

kford224 wrote: »

I see what you're saying, but then how or why would you save for a house with someone you're very much in love with and it be a case of "It's great we are on our way to getting a deposit for our own house together, but why don't we spend some of that money lining someone elses pocket just to double check that it will work?" I think I would be a bit insulted! I suppose it is similar to the schools of thought on pre-nups.

That's the difference between us then, I wouldn't be insulted at all. It would just seem eminently sensible.

Also, as I have already pointed out twice, renting can be just as expensive as buying, especially in the early years when you're paying a lot of interest so you're not necessarily lining someone's pocket at the expense of yours. I also think avoiding living together first JUST because you don't want to pay rent is silly. This is (hopefully) a life long commitment

Not to mention the fact that I would MUCH rather pay rent and actually live with my husband than live with family, even if it were rent free. We have our space, privacy, freedom and pride. That's much more valuable to me.

kford224 wrote: »

I personally don't think you need to full-on live with someone to know whether it would work.

As I said earlier, you don't necessarily need to, but that doesn't mean it wouldn't be wise to do so.

kford224 wrote: »

Spending loads of time together generally/holidays and the like helps you determine things like that.

Spending time together on holiday is very, very different to living with each other all the time.

kford224

ViolaLass wrote: »

Not to mention the fact that I would MUCH rather pay rent and actually live with my husband than live with family, even if it were rent free. We have our space, privacy, freedom and pride. That's much more valuable to me.

I do agree with you on that one, but there is no way we could rent and save for a deposit at the same time. I rented for several years at Uni and then afterwards with friends before returning home and it is even more difficult being at home when you are used to having the freedom!

stqueen

kford224 wrote: »

I don't think we need to waste a few months of house deposit savings in order to know whether we want to live together or not. Renting is dead money, and if you feel you need to do that before buying, then surely the relationship is already a bit shakey?!

I disagree with this - living together is a HUGE HUGE step away from being in a relationship and living apart. It is certainly testing I know a couple who split not long after they moved in together (rented) because being with each other 24/7 was too much and they found they weren't as compatible as they thought!

Having said that, moving in together shouldn't, and in most cases doesn't mean the death of a relationship.

Good luck :T