O/S disasters.... let us share...

northwest1965

Oh god, I bet you are gutted, how awful !

Nessa56

Primrose wrote: »

Love this old thread which has resurfaced so if I've contributed before, forgive me for repeating some of mine over the years:

1. When newly married and unfamilar with how a pressure cooker worked, I flicked up the pressure valve immediately after cooking lentil soup for 18 minutes. The entire contents instantly emptied themselves in a hizzing stream, covering the kitchen walls and ceiling and we had to redecorate.
2. Cooking a Christmas capon with the gizzards still inside.
3. Emptying a frozen packet of Gooseberry purree into a saucepan of Minestrone soup thinking it was Chicken stock.
4. Borrowing OH's new car to collect a couple of buckets of horse manure I'd spotted in a nearby lane and foolishly putting the buckets on the back seat. Drove round a bend on the way home too quickly and ended up with two buckets of steamig poo all over the new upholstery. (Have never been forgiven for that one !!)
5. Making pepperonata with several large whole Hungarian Wax chillis from the freezer, mistakenly thinking they were small peppers.
6. Putting chestnuts to cook in the microwave and forgetting to split the skins first. (Produces something akin to a nuclear explosion).
7. Throwing a jug of water into the eye level in-built grill when some of the fat from grilling sausages caught fire. NEVER EVER PUT WATER ON A FAT FIRE.
8. Not leaving enough fermenting space in about 8 gallon jars of elderberry wine after racking off the pulp and leaving them on a light coloured kitchen worktop overnight. Came down the following morning to find they'd all blown out all the fermentation traps, overflowed onto the counter, down the cupboards and onto the floor staining everything bright purple.
9. As a new bride, putting 3 whole BULBS of garlic into a meat loaf when the recipe called for 3 CLOVES of garlic. (It was the first time I'd ever used the stuff and didn't know the difference).

I'd like to think I'm now older and wiser, but only until the next time...........

Oh, and I must tell you about a friend of mine many years ago who put her baby's soaking nappies in a plastic bucket onto her electric cooker ring to boil them because she didn't have a washing machine.! :rotfl:

Have just come across this, I am crying here soooo funny and some of them unfortunately very familiar :rotfl::rotfl:

v
x

elizabunny

Had to add my recent disaster to this thread. You can picture the scene, its Christmas Eve and I have just put a large Gammon Joint into my slow cooker plus some cola to cook it in. (However with hindsight I realised I'd overdone the cola ie. filled the cooking pot to the top) We then went out visiting for around 4 hours and when we came back, we were greeted with the sight of sticky cola and fatty liquid pouring out of the slow cooker all over the worktop, down the front of the cuboards and washing machine and then onto the floor surrounding the worktops. Good job we popped back when we did (we were going on to a carol service) as I think we might have drowned the dogs in this gloopy mess:eek:, however they did seem to help enjoy helping in the cleaning up process...it was horrendous! But we did save the Gammon:D

cheeswright

My cake making is pretty bad
well - really bad - they taste ok but for some reason tend to look deformed
the kids and now i think of it even the kids friends now ask - can we make goblin cakes -(instead of fairy cakes) - because theyre so dmn ugly!

jollymummy

Many moons ago I decided to impress my boyfriend by making him a carrot, orange and walnut cake, I didn't have a cake tin so decided to use a thick earthenware dish, :eek:the recipe called for a flat tin, the dish I used was small and stumpy, I cooked it for ages, burnt outside, raw inside , yuck!!
He still married me though, I follow my BERO book to the letter these days

Cruiksl

Laughing my head off at some of the things and sitting here pretty smug.......

Until I returned to the kitchen - in my wisdom, I'd peeled some potatoes earlier, put some water in and put a piece of kitchen roll over the top of them to keep them moist. The kitchen roll has done it's job and soaked up the water, dripped it over the worktop and all over the kitchen floor.

While starting to clean that up, I moved a pyrex jug that I'd taken extra gravy from my steak pie but dropped it, smashed the jug and had gravy and glass all over the floor.

Ho hum - wonder what the 3rd thing today will be.

jaxx46

Love this thread and felt it needed a bump so here goes...
1st time i ever made jelly didn't have a jug so tipped pint of boiling water from kettle straight into a glass millk bottle, picked up the bottle and the bottom stayed on the worktop :eek: boiling water everywhere. Got fed up with flat yorkies so decided to follow st Delias recipe, made the batter, heated the oil, poured in batter straight into v hot oven on top shelf. So far so good lol, left them for the time specified then went to get them out, They had risen beautifully i was so chuffed, until i took the tray out, they had risen so well they were all stuck to the top of the oven :rotfl:
But probably the funniest thing ever happened back in the day when I was a NAAFI bird. We used to make all of our own sandwiches so one morning I put 36 eggs in a pan to hard boil ready for egg mayonnaise then blithely go off to serve the 250 odd soldiers their bacon baps etc, cue an apparent barrage of shots :eek:
all the customers hitting the deck and 1 v irate manager wanting to know who'd forgotten the eggs :rotfl: I never lived that down but to be honest it still makes me chuckle.

KarleyMarie

Just read this from beginning to end...
Absolutely hilarious!

Thanks everyone, really cheered me up!
x

juliethemuse

i just cannot master the art of breadmaking, my last effort turned out as hard as concrete! OH suggested we could use it as a doorstop

Kitcaboodle

I once made a perfect loaf in our breadmaker. The paddle even stayed in the pan rather than in the bottom of the loaf.

However, while cutting it, I discovered something silver inside it... the crumpled up yeast packet that I had, for some unknown reason, 'thrown away' into the pan once I'd emptied the yeast out!

I also (back in my teenage years) once tried to be healthy by making the sauce for macaroni cheese with wholegrain flour... a word of advice - don't!