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Need advice please - no money and no gas / electricity

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  • CACHAF
    CACHAF Posts: 132 Forumite
    Tried, got to be on income support for 26 weeks first and they wouldnt bend the rules no matter how hard I tried.
  • shirleymarye
    shirleymarye Posts: 198 Forumite
    edited 27 November 2010 at 1:30PM
    Couldn't your Gran stay with you on a temporary basis till you get the money sorted? That way you could all keep warm and you wouldn't have to keep doing the journey every day. I would have done this in your position ages ago.
  • CACHAF
    CACHAF Posts: 132 Forumite
    Then gran would be cold too. There is no money to put gas or electric on in our house so her coming to stay wouldnt help, would it? And she still has to pay the bills at her own home which is where she is on a stay warm scheme with a set amount to pay each months so her being away from her own home wouldnt save money on fuel bills either. At least this way she is warm at home and we can keep warm during the day at her house and cook at hers.
  • Maybe you are being too honest! You shouldn't have claimed carer's allowance till after Gran got her money,why are they taking so long anyway? If you stopped claiming the carer's money you would get the JSA wouldn't you? I would do that as in the present job climate you probably wouldn't be offered a job anyway! Can you go on to Freecycle and ask for an oil heater or gas heater,at least you could be warm that way even if you have to buy the oil or gas by borrowing from Gran!
  • CACHAF
    CACHAF Posts: 132 Forumite
    I haven't claimed carers allowance yet, I have to wait for grans attendance allowance to come through first.

    I couldn't keep quiet about the amount of care I was giving as at the time my husband went on JSA my gran was so ill I was living with her, couldn't leave her alone at all and so couldn't go the 5 miles to the nearest Job center plus office to sign on! I explained about the amount of care I was giving and therefor why I couldn't sign on when I don't have a job and instead of using their discretion to allow me to receive JSA without having to go in and sign they instead didn't allow us to claim! I didnt have the time or the energy at the time to argue (I was living on less than 3 hours sleep a night and doing everything for my gran) and so we just left it. Now I cannot receive JSA as they know how much care I give as they know my grabs situation. Now we are waiting to hear about income support, which they estimate will take 3 weeks to complete.

    We cannot borrow off gran as she is receiving private pensions which just cover her outgoings. Sadly it seems that working all your life and paying your own money into your own pensions means that you don't qualify for any help and so you have to continue to pay all your bills yourself out of the money you saved away! If she could help then she would do as she feels very guilty about the situiation we are in - she sees it all as her fault whereas it is just a loophole that we have got caught up in.

    All we have to do is survive till the income support decision comes through and then we should be ok - its just how to survive till then that is the problem.
  • I hate to say this but from what you say your Gran shouldn't be living on her own if you have to give her so much time? She would be better in a nursing home or social services should be helping her and not you as you are not in a position to give it. I was in your position myself years ago with my MIL and in the end because I didn't get any benefits for caring for her we transferred her to a nursing home. We were all better off in the long run as I was able to work then. Let's face it what would happen to Gran if you weren't able to look after her? Social Services would have to step in. Can't understand why you haven't figured it out since September.
  • janninew
    janninew Posts: 3,781 Forumite
    How awful for you OP, especially as its so cold at the moment. :(

    I have no suggestions really, I take it you have nobody you can borrow money from for a few weeks? I don't understand in this day and age, how this can be happening. Try and live in the one room when your at home, cover up on the sofa with blankets, and use hot water bottles if you can (not sure how you can heat the water up though?) Wear hats and fingerless gloves and try and keep as active as possible.

    Good luck and I really hope this situation is sorted very soon.
    :heart2: Newborn Thread Member :heart2:

    'Children reinvent the world for you.' - Susan Sarandan
  • CACHAF
    CACHAF Posts: 132 Forumite
    I hate to say this but from what you say your Gran shouldn't be living on her own if you have to give her so much time? She would be better in a nursing home or social services should be helping her and not you as you are not in a position to give it. I was in your position myself years ago with my MIL and in the end because I didn't get any benefits for caring for her we transferred her to a nursing home. We were all better off in the long run as I was able to work then. Let's face it what would happen to Gran if you weren't able to look after her? Social Services would have to step in. Can't understand why you haven't figured it out since September.

    My gran and I have always been close and over the course of my life she has looked after my (when I was ill with M.E for 6 years) and helped my husband and I so much and so now she needs me I am not going to just pass her off to someone else or put her in a home for my convenience. Yes, she needs a lot of care, but she is still the same grandma and is still rational and coherent and she deserves the chance to stay in her own home, have her independence and continue to live as normally as possible. Sadly she is now always going to need help but each month we see her getting stronger and so hopefully soon she will not need as much full day care as she does now although she will always need me there each day for meals, medication, medical care etc.

    Having seen the carers social services have sent to my mother after she had a serious accident and became very disabled I would rather struggle on with no heating or food to make sure my gran had the level of care she needs and the dignity she deserves. I know not all carers are the same and some people do it for the satisfaction of making a difference inn someones life, but I know that the level of care I am giving is excellent, that my gran is safe and happy with me and that the job I am doing is more important, rewarding and satisfying that anything I could do out in the 'real world'

    The problem is that there is just not provision in this country for carers. Even with carers allowance I would be working 35 hours a week for less than £2 an hour which is wrong. If I was staying home to look after children I would receive far more benefit, wouldnt have to wait for it to come through or fight for it to be awarded in the first place and would not be questioned by the job center for 'deliberately making myself unavailable for work' I enjoy caring for my gran, i don't want to give it up - I just want what I am entitled to without having to jump through hoops at what is already a difficult and painful time.

    The problem is that if someone develops a new and sudden condition, eg a stroke or a heart attack, then it is very likely that they are going to need a high level of care for quite some time. however the rules say that you have to have needed the level of care that you need for at least 6 months before you can claim disability benefit and someone can claim carers allowance. That means that for someone like me, your life can change dramatically over night and you find youself in the position of being a carer for 6 months without it being recognised by anyone and withough being able to claim any financial help at all. After the 6 months there is then the application process to go through which, although it is backdated when awarded, can take 12 weeks and so effectively you can be without benefits for 9 months. This seems so unfair!

    Yesterday the vicar at the local church gave us £20 to buy gas with which should last us a few days. This was a massive help and I am very grateful to him for this although I feel guilty at having to ask. Tomorrow I am going to chase up income support as they should have received my application from the job center by then and so hopefully they will be able to give me more idea of how long it is going to take to come through.

    I think what upsets me the most about the situation is that this has been the most difficult, tiring, painful, frightening situation I have ever been in and yet one of the hardest things about it has been struggling with the job center and struggling for money and it shouldn't be like this. It's just sad.
  • Gothicfairy
    Gothicfairy Posts: 3,060 Forumite
    I think it is great that you are trying to help your gran and seeing some "homes" in my area I can totally understand why you would want to do that. Before my father died I joked that I would put him into a home ( got to explain that as a child he would say " I get to choose your school / what party you go too / Where you live" etc and I would say " yes but I get to pick your nursing home") but I don't think I would have done that until it got to such a stage I really could not cope.

    I am sorry that I can't offer any advice or help but I really wish you all the best
    There is a race of men that don't fit in; A race that can't stand still;
    So they break the hearts of kith and kin, and roam the world at will.

    Robert Service
  • I know all about caring,I have been a carer to my brother who later died from cancer,he lived with me and I worked while I cared for him. I was a carer to my my MIL for 10 years and I worked full time,I was a carer to my husband and a carer to a friend who died later. I only got paid carers money for my friend and all I got was £25 a week. I now live on a state pension and find it very hard to make ends meet,my washing machine has packed up and I can't replace it as yet. I always preferred to work rather claim benefits but now I am almost 72 and unable to work. I still say your Gran should stay with you,her pension would help you all out even though she has to pay some of it out for heating her own place,all her other bills could be put on hold till she gets her backdated money. Just because you love someone very much you still have to live and should not rely on other people helping you out,benefits people are the worst people to rely on.
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