Debt v Life

MET_3

Hi all, I have been lurking on this forum for a good few months and have decided to make a few comments. Being in debt seems to take over peoples lives...which I find very sad. I know its important to pay back your debts but there is more to life than just making repayments month in month out. The most important thing is your family and having a life. Debts can wait. People who you owe money to will wait. I owe £80k but make sure that I look after my family first and don't offer the creditors more than I can afford. I worry when people on this forum start panicking over a few grands worth of debts...and making offers which they can't afford. Banks and CC companies usually agree to your payment offers if they realise that is all you can afford...but even if they don't stick to your guns and don't offer any more. I set up a repayment plan with all my creditors and all agreed and have done over the last 4 years. I think the most important thing is having a life and keeping your family safe and happy. Anyway rant over. m

JohnInDebt

Too many people spend every last penny on paying back their debt and don't seem to leave a little for themselves for luxuries. In my experience they seem to be the ones that fall off the wagon and get back to old habits pretty quick.

It can be compared to a diet where if you dont allow the odd luxury you end up feeling like you're missing out and end up going overboard in one go and you feel that all your previous efforts have been completely wasted.

Life should always come first, but it improves a lot if you see your debts coming down. Finding the right balance is the key to long term succcess!

bonnie_2

Do what, it's going to take you a long time to pay that £80k of then isn't it, i got out of debt through this site and lived on £50 a week for a year, you don't need money to have a life, the best things in life are free, as they say.
At least i can sleep at night and know my money's my own. Hubby's loan will be finished november 1st 2007 and that's £40 odd thousand worth of debt gone between us since 2003.
I would rather go without for 5 years say than have all that debt hanging over me.

Brassic

I know what you're saying, and hubby would happily go along with it as well I think, but the problem is the long term. The last thing I want is that in 10 years time we are still struggling along, paying out the same amount each month, not able to take the kids on holiday, or buy decent christmas presents.

I (and hubby now) would much rather work our butts off to get out of this mess asap, even if it means some hardship for the time being, so we can enjoy life to the max (without maxing out our credit cards) in 4 or 5 years time.

Yes the kids may suffer for a short while along with us, but believe me they do suffer the least, and hopefully it'll be a good life lesson for them along the way.

MET_3

All I'm saying is don't let it ruin your life. Yes it may take a little bit longer but I'm certainly not going to let my kids miss out by living on a budget that is not managable. I'm not saying don't pay back. I'm just saying you have to have a life as well..or whats the point.

nearlyrich

Everyone has different opinions of what works in this situation, there is no right or wrong answer whatever works for you is just fine, it's a good topic for discussion but it could turn into one of those threads that has to be edited or even closed so please remember to be nice to all moneysavers and save me a job later;)

Donedoingdebt

Of course life & family etc is more important than debts. But MET, like yourself I had huge debts when I started out on this DMP & to see your wages nearly all swallowed up just by the interest payments alone can be stressful enough in itself, let alone stop you buying nice things for your family. I agree not to offer more than you can afford, but the more you pay, obviously the quicker the debt comes down. I sometimes feel that if the bankruptcy laws were as they are now when I started DMP in 2000, I may well have chosen that route.

Brassic

I know you weren't, was just putting across my point of view too. We *do* have a life (honest!) but we just make it a free life for the time being. Next year is going to be devoted to camping, cycling and exploring. The kids are dead excited, it's going to cost us nothing other than petrol and some minor camp site fees, and will be healthy and fun. Can't wait. (We're lucky that the equipment is being donated by family members who don't use it anymore).

Last weekend we had a splendid time - went to a country park near us, went for a walk round the lake and the trim trail (my abs hurt until yesterday!) and then spent time playing in the park. Came back and had lovely warm home made leak and potato soup. Can't beat it with a big stick IMHO!

Doing it this way means I can throw all spare cash at my debts, and still have a great time with my family.

Annie_Fanny

MET wrote:

All I'm saying is don't let it ruin your life. Yes it may take a little bit longer but I'm certainly not going to let my kids miss out by living on a budget that is not managable. I'm not saying don't pay back. I'm just saying you have to have a life as well..or whats the point.

What exactly do you think your kids would miss out on by living on a budget?

I think the problem here is that you see budgeting as something that automatically means going without. You cannot see that if you attempt to change your point of view you may actually see living on a budget as actually being more favourable then adding another X years onto your debt repayments.

Oops just editing to say that this is not meant in anyway as nasty - just my opinion. Am really interested in this discussion.

climbgirl

Brassic wrote:

We *do* have a life (honest!) but we just make it a free life for the time being.

Well said Brassic. I agree that family, friends etc are the most important things in life. But having said that, spending time with them does not have to equal spending money (whether you're in debt or not!).

I know it's each to their own, but if it was me I'd rather get the debt gone asap.

Brassic

Donedoingdebt wrote:

Of course life & family etc is more important than debts. But MET, like yourself I had huge debts when I started out on this DMP & to see your wages nearly all swallowed up just by the interest payments alone can be stressful enough in itself, let alone stop you buying nice things for your family. I agree not to offer more than you can afford, but the more you pay, obviously the quicker the debt comes down. I sometimes feel that if the bankruptcy laws were as they are now when I started DMP in 2000, I may well have chosen that route.

Just wanted to say you're an inspiration - I've not seen you post before and have been really inspired to see how much you've cleared. Keep up the good work!