Advice on toddler night time dryness please?

[Deleted User]

Before I proceed I would like to mention that I think this post belongs in this area as it relates to saving money on washing and absorbant bed mats. Glad if it needs moving, my apologies.

Ok, i'm unsure on the best way to proceed so would like the opinions of those who've been there done that.

My nearly 4 yr old has been dry at night since Aug albeit a handful of accidents. He has a protective sheet on his bed just in case and we stopped using Pampers bed mats shortly after. He was dry for a few weeks, then he had 2 or 3 accidents in a row and lost his confidence, so we started lifting him before we went to bed and continued to do so until a few nights ago, when we forgot.

He stayed dry!!!! So we've carried it on, 4th night tonight. So he can go 12-13 hrs. I think this is possible as long as he doesn't over do the fluid before bed, obviously. Really hoping this continues.

Our DD is 2yrs 9ms and is dry approx 4/7 nights, sometimes more. We've thought about dropping the pullups to see how she goes, then we get a couple of wet ones in a row. The nights she is dry she goes 12-13 hrs too and is very proud of herself too.:j

Do you think in order for her to achieve a dry night we should remove her pullups and lift her before our bed, or wait until she's dry 100% and not do the lifting. Is lifting a bad thing in terms of night time training. I don't know. My Mum said she lifted both of us, but can't remember when she stopped, she thinks by primary school, but my mum's memory of these things is often in accuarate.

Also you may also remember my son has had issues with his bowels, holding on and not wanting to go to the toilet, we got over it, had setbacks, got over them, now after 2-3 months of regular patterns, he's regressed again. Following chats to find out if there are any problems, he doesn't really offer anything, (its hard enough to find out who's he's played with at school that day), i'm trying very hard not to get cross with him and take it on the chin. From experience that approach has worked best, but its sooooooo hard not to get angry with him esp when i know he can do it, he's just too busy playing to poo and doesn't get embarrassed by the mess he's made.

His nursery teacher said (upon my say so) they chucked a pair of pants today as they were too grim to save. I feel despondant that we are heading down this route again, last week i had to throw out 2 pairs (and i'm not one to chuck pants lightly - :money:). He's starting school in september, we are looking at schools this week and next, how can i solve this problem of him holding onto poo and not exploding in class.

Its a rant and a two folded post, sorry, but from bed mats to pullups to pants, i reckon babies in nappies are far easier. Esp when most of my friends just seem to train their kids and that's it.

Just to add, he has a healthy diet, lots of fruit, veg, whole grains etc, the problem isn't fibre or lack of, its his unwillingness to listen to his body signals.

SUESMITH_2

my daughter had to see a continence nurse, we were told not to night lift like that as kids need to be awake properly to understand that they need to go.

personally i would leave her a bit longer in pull ups.

as to your son. lots of kids go through this phase, have you taken him to the gp to make sure that he isnt constipated or got a sore bottom? if not has your health been any help?

good luck! sorry i can't offer any more help

[Deleted User]

Thanks Suesmith, that's been my inkling, night time dryness is night time awareness, same as in daytime. That's helpful so thanks.

In every other respect he's fine, just busy being a busy boy who doesn't want to take a pit stop in case he misses something. In the meantime, me and my family and friends have to suffer some revolting smells.

SUESMITH_2

its difficult isnt it? your wee boy may suddenly grow out of this - especially when he goes to school and realises that other children don't do it. maybe alittle reminder if he hasn't been and he's busy?

good luck!!!

ailuro2

tbh I'd go to the Dr or health visitor and ask about the pooing in the pants thing - I can remember when I was very young standing on the doorstep after a day out praying my dad would open the door faster, it was a very urgent feeling...

so you need to find out if something is wrong, as the body is designed to give out signals to tell us when to go...do you think he's getting the signal?

if there's nothing wrong with the signals and he is just ignoring them then a bit of reward / withdrawal of reward ( I don't want to call it a punishment as that's not fair) might be needed to get him to pay attention.
A treat every day he is clean - something that rewards big boy behaviour - like getting to choose what him and little sis have for tea, or choosing what story they have at bedtime. If he goes a whole week with clean pants take them out somewhere special ( doesn't have to be expensive) Get him in to the habit of asking himself whether he needs to go to the loo, link it into the same tasks he does every day - so every time he cleans his teeth, washes his hands before a meal, goes for a wee etc...
Of course he might be thinking it's OK to mess himself as his little sis was getting away with it for the past 2 1/2 years??

[Deleted User]

We've decided to go down the treat reward which we did yesterday when he legged it to the loo without being prompted, think he knew Tuesday was un-necessary.

Yesterday i took the kids to the zoo as we are members and having just gone through the turnstile, i notice my daughter do this little jig, saying she wants a poo, when we get there, she's already started in her knicks (she NEVER does this) and said to me "Jack does it too". Oh dear!!!

I explained to her that poo goes in the toilet and not in her knicks, which she does know, so hoping its a one off.

We'll get there, my SIL is a teaching assistant and said to me if someone dirties themselves in class it generally only happens the once, peer pressure and all that. I just hope it doesn't cause the opposite problem and encourage him to hold it in all day.

Ah well, that's a while off yet.

Thanks people for your help.