He's running away to nigeria

knithappens

freyanneke wrote: »

I understand it is a matter of principle to get him to provide something for your child. What I don't understand is why you would like to waste your time and energy like that. You could end up with court orders, paternity test and CSA rulings in your favour, but still not receiving any money from this person.

totally agree with all this, I got all the forms, filed them out with evidence, but i thought no, doing this just keeps me connected to him, and I anted to move on and get over everything he had done to me, it his is responsibility to step up,not for me to make him, he only has one person to answer to, thats his daughter, if y then she wants anything to do with him, and that is for her to make her mind up when she is older

freyanneke_2

knithappens wrote: »

totally agree with all this, I got all the forms, filed them out with evidence, but i thought no, doing this just keeps me connected to him, and I anted to move on and get over everything he had done to me, it his is responsibility to step up,not for me to make him, he only has one person to answer to, thats his daughter, if y then she wants anything to do with him, and that is for her to make her mind up when she is older

I am in the same boat with my three boys. It might never happen, but maybe one day they will understand what I am doing for them. My ex's way of showing that he cares is leaving a large bag of sweets hanging at the door. He has not paid anything since giving the children 10 pounds each for pocket money in June 2009.

It is very hard to accept that I have children with someone with low values and not enough responsibility towards his offspring. I just choose to keep my energy focussed on giving the children my best.

I wish everyone who has to deal with this enough strength to be wise in whatever route they choose to deal with this problem.

gratefulforhelp_2

Going to Nigeria could well be an empty threat, especially if he has a house here with any equity in it.

I fervently wish my NRP would go there permanently (sorry not much help to you), but suspect he thinks by saying that he will somehow "throw you off the scent".

Oh and change your number and insist communication is in writing if he is being rude/agressive/a nuisance.

MissMoneypenny

TWEETYPIE wrote: »

The last time we spoke Nov 09 he was not working & advised me that his hse may be repod. (wanted £6k from me) I also cant really be sure if he actually owns it himself or with someone eles, possibly his sister not sure of her details, as he has told me numerious lies in relation to other children/money/work,

You can find out who the registered owner/s of the house is, by going to the Land Registry site and downloading the title register; for just £4.
https://www.landregistry.gov.uk/wps/portal/Property_Search

TWEETYPIE_3

Thanks to everyone for their advise, I'm personally not chasing him for money, to use a current euthamism hes wasteman, cant be bothered. I only provided his name to CSAS whilst on maternity leave as the state pays the last three months money, I did not realise that I could have given a made up name & address. The CSA cantacted him last week, for info on himself and advised him that they have contacted I.REV. which is why he's P....d as hes self employed but unforntunaly for him he works under contract

Kimitatsu

TWEETYPIE wrote: »

Thanks to everyone for their advise, I'm personally not chasing him for money, to use a current euthamism hes wasteman, cant be bothered. I only provided his name to CSAS whilst on maternity leave as the state pays the last three months money, I did not realise that I could have given a made up name & address. The CSA cantacted him last week, for info on himself and advised him that they have contacted I.REV. which is why he's P....d as hes self employed but unforntunaly for him he works under contract

If he works under contract then the CSA can impose an attachment of earnings order to his employer. He can always leave of course but you may get something out of it.

Bear in mind that contact and maintenance are not linked so just because he is paying doesnt mean that he has to see his child if he doesnt want to or he doesnt keep up regular contact.