Benefits advice needed please!

confusedone

Hi i used this forum and am very grateful for the help i received when i went br last year. Think I really need some help again so thought id try here! My current situation..

married 33, seperated and living with my mum but back together with wife and stay at home 3 days per week. We have a 5 year old and a 5 month year old, but we are far too scared of getting caught living together so strictly stick to the 3 days per week rule although im there throughout the day etc.

I was a nurse and lost my job last year, decent pay etc so never really had benefits. went through depression (sounds like a flipping country and western song this, sorry!), but much better now. Recently started back at school full time, thought id get student finance until the very day i enrolled and was declined, due to having a nursing qual. Anyway this means im now paying 2300 for a course, and as im not entitled to course fee loans i dont get any form of education grants etc, course is around 20 miles each way, so basically been borrowing money for petrol etc, still had a bit of wages left from old job but that is all gone now. Been getting esa but again as im in full time education, that is now stopped. I did just get 300 for returning to work though which i didnt expect so that is a real help! ive just started a job for 16 hours a week, working out i think around 150 take home, will do more hours when i can but doing 3 days in school and homework, so 2 days per week for now is the baseline and see what else i can do, half terms etc. that is me.

My wife, did work as a postie, and has always worked, even when our first was a baby, but she has relocated to where my mum lives, well the town anyway. she does not know people here, has a house with our 2 children and gets her rent paid for her.

We badly want to move in together back to normal but really worry if we can do it. my wages wouldnt even cover the rent.
Also i dont think if we did get any benefits, they would take into account our outgoing of college, it is a foundation degree so a recognised full time course, but i work too. (??!!!!)

We heard of another couple, friends from another area before we split who said as her husband earns so little that they get help with their rent.

Is there anyone here who might know a little bit about this. we feel if we approach the benefits agency ourselves they may be a little bit accusatory and start suggesting we are cheating benefits, which we arent. we are very very strict with the 3 days per week rule (not even sure if that is the rule, but lots of friends and family have told us that).

Any help here would be really really apreciated!

Kind regards

Alan

skintbint_2

the 3 day rule is an urban myth, if you are living there at all and are "perceived" to be a couple then you can be classed as living together.

Caz3121

The 3 nights a week rule is a myth. The benefits people may class you as a couple with your situation now with the circumstances you describe - you even refer to yourself as 'being back together' and living at 'home'
Have a look at the Turn2Us calculator and see what benefits you would receive if officially living together.
better that than waiting for someone to knock on the door and accuse your wife of benefit fraud

Jowo_2

No such thing as a 3 day rule.

DX2

Alan, best not actually listen to friends and family as they clearly don't have a clue what they are talking about.

Benefit help here: http://www.turn2us.org.uk/benefits_search.aspx

confusedone

Ok many thanks for clearing up the 3 nights rule. To be honest i think we are going to have to come clean anyway, half my stuff is there and it is becoming unpractical. I say come clean, before i was working we honestly didnt feel that we were doing anything too bad, had nil money coming in and felt that if worst came and we did get investigated, we have never been in any sort of trouble, have always worked hard and it wouldnt be like were were pulling in loads of money and milking the system. Probably naive and totally wrong but there we are. And now ive started working this week we are looking at sorting it out all above board, hence the asking.

With regard to our situation, i imagine we are far from unique and im hoping there is someone out there who may have been in a similar situation to share their experiences or advice.

Many thanks for your input so far.

dktreesea

With an income of £150 a week, you would qualify, if you are back together for working tax credit, which, while not as much as JSA or income support, would give you adn your wife some income, plus you would get child tax credit for the children. I would think you would still qualify for at least some of your rent and council tax paid, and possibly all of it. You just file a change of circumstances. I recommend doing this after the latest housing benefits payment has been paid, so that a month should be then enough to srot things about, i.e. before the next benefits payment becomes due.

Sad about the nursing though. Not all hospitals are the same - some are much better places to work than others.

confusedone

hi thanks for the reply. With regard to nursing, yes it is sad but i did 10 years and worked in a few places etc, just not for me. Interesting point my mum said the other day - she reckons 10 years is now the average time spent in the nursing profession nowadays and thinking about my cohort, who all qualified in 2002, she is probably right, most have left! I digress.........

So we may be eligible for some sort of credit help then? What happens if you are on variable pay, like if eextra hours were available etc how do they work that out? do they check your wages monthly or weekly?

All very confusing and very daunting!