Being 'tight' or being creative

thriftlady_2

I've been thinking a lot lately about how living an OS lifestyle leads one to find creative solutions to problems. If you've read The Tightwad Gazette you'll know that the author (Amy D..... can't spell it) talks about this a lot.

Now, every bonfire night it has become a tradition for us to wander down the road to the back of the rugby club and watch their fantastic firework display for free. I had always regarded this as a creative solution to the problem of watching a good display without the dangers involved in having them in the garden (and them not being very good). We can see the display from our bedroom window anyway.

I was startled therefore to hear OH say he wished he didn't have to be 'so tight' and not pay to go in to the rugby ground. He feels we're sending the wrong messages to the kids ie- we're too mean/poor to pay. I think we're sending the message that it's silly to spend money on something you can get for free.

Without getting into the rights and wrongs of whether we should look at fireworks we haven't paid for - a bit difficult to avoid I'd say and if we didn't have this display near us we would go to another one and pay;) what do you think ? Creative solution or being tight ?

Anyone got any similar situations where you think you're being resourceful and creative and others just think you're a tight a*** ?

MrsTinks

Hmmmm difficult one - We are going to the one in our village which isnt cheap but all proceeds go to charities etc and there is a great village feeling stood round with mulled wine and chatting to other people in the village Ok it's about £10 for the 2 of us but we enjoy it and I could get round it by saying it's a charitable donation

However if I didn't have the money for it I would have NO problems watching it from home for free

skintchick

Are there other things at the rugby club other than th fireworsk? ie some food, games, etc?

If so then perhaps your OH is worried your kids are missing out on stuff thier mates are doing.

Have the kids perhaps said it to him because they'd like to go to it properly? And they don;t know how to ask you?

Is it really loads of money?

My dad would agree with you and do it for free, but maybe you could compromise on this one thing if it's important to your Oh and kids?

Pooky

I'd class it as creative - I'm a great one for "freebies"....The school have a big display every year in a field at the back, we just go to the next field over and watch, they still raise enough money to pay for the display and to make approx £1000 profit.

Yes that profit goes back into school to fund p.t.a. events, yes my children do enjoy taking part in these events and yes they'd probably like to sit with their friends when watching the fire works but the simple truth is that £15 for us all to attend would mean cutting the budget elsewhere. If one of the kids needs new shoes then that's something you have to pay for - you can't just watch a pair for free and I've no problem paying for things like that, but if there is a way of doing something, as a family, for little or nothing, then count me in.

thriftlady_2

skintchick wrote:

My dad would agree with you and do it for free, but maybe you could compromise on this one thing if it's important to your Oh and kids?

The fireworks aren't a particular issue to OH or kids and we will continue to watch for free They were just an example. I was interested to see how creative others are about saving money and whether their efforts were regarded by friends and family as 'great ideas' or just 'being mean'.

hollydays

I used to give presents to a relative,who would tell me as she unwrapped it carefully,that she was going to re use the paper.It made me feel a bit uncomfotable,hee hee,particularly if I got a present back in the same paper.I dont object to it ,in principal,perhaps it would have been more tactful if she had kept it to herself!

dolly_day_dream

I think there is a big difference between being creative with money and being tight. I can understand in way what your husband is saying. He doesn't want your children to grow up like my ex - "I will get as much as I can without paying for it"

My ex-husband was what can only be described as 'tight as a ducks ****' not just with money but with everything in life. He would walk a mile to save a penny whether the cheaper item was really good value or not. He would take great pleasure in making sure that he got all of the good - well paying shifts- to the detriment of his fellow workers. If he saw something lying around he would take it - even if he had no use for it whatsoever. He couldn't bear to see it go to someone else. His whole life revolved around material things. He had a well paying job but kept us short of money all the time so that he could save in the building society.

Now I don't see being creative with money or OS as being like that at all. I see it as making the best use of what you have. I truly hope that I have never harmed anyone else in my endeavours to money save. Please do not think that I am implying that you are in any way like my ex. If it was me I would probably explain to the children that this is a safe way for them to watch the fireworks and not mention the money at all. There is a big difference between being money grabbing and money saving and as far as I am concerned the first one is just too much trouble and stressful.

I mean no offence by anything that I have written - just putting the point of view of someone who lived with a tight *************:mad:

thriftlady_2

My inlaws are masters of the recycled wrapping thing. They use gift bags with the expectation that the gift bag will do the rounds over and over again Definitely creative, not tight in my book.

cats_whiskers

Hi

I agree that firework displays can work out quite expensive if there are a few of you going and watching them for free can save the pennies. However, is your OH being ribbed by his mates about being tight or are your children getting teased by other kids at school about not going paying to see the display.

Maybe this year ask them what they would like to do, let them be part of the decision making. Give them a choice of either you pay for the firework display but it means they cannot go swimming or it is at the expense of the cinema trip. If they want to go into the ground to see the full display then maybe you can agree to that but if they want to buy other things once in the grounds, ie, drinks/eats they have to pay for it themselves out of their own pocket money.

Do you meet up with any other friends who also watch from the back of the club. Maybe you could get together with them or some OS friends to suggest that someone hosts a firework party. We do this with our friends who have a fairly large garden, we only have one average box of fireworks although we do have loads of sparklers. It is fun and exciting to watch from a safe distance. We usually time it so that we are in the garden at the same time as the local school has their display so we also watch all their fireworks going off as well so we get the best of both.

Cheers
Cats.

MrsTinks

All the parents in our village are celebrating because sparklers have been banned from our bonfire "not only because of the potential injuries, but because it takes a lot of time and effort to clear up the metal sticks afterwards and the fields are home to sheep and cows who might get hurt"... not to mention the cost to the parents lol I bet you it was someone fed up of the hassles year after year for money for the sparklers

kethry

LOL my family are the other way around... when i worked, and lived at home (i.e. with parents, and wasted all my money cos i'd never had to live off a very small amount) i would quite often buy expensive christmas presents, and while they were appreciated, i think at the same time there was this feeling of.. well.. you could be saving to buy your own house!

now i'm doing the whold OS thing (and i have done for a few years now, without knowing what it was called, just doing it on my own, through necessity) they seem to appreciate any presents i do give them that much more. maybe because when its HM they appreciate the time and thought that went into making something... in addition, my family have always been OS to a certain extent - Grandpa made his own bread, grew his own fruit and veg, and bottled it (i have *very* fond memories of Grandpa's HM jam.. yum), Grannie made things - its my parents who've gone less OS because of time (they both work) but i bet as soon as they retire and move out of the city to the countryside (as they want to do) they'll be back to doing the OS thing.

on the other hand theres a big difference between being OS and saving where you can, even if it means missing going to the event, and being tight - being tight, to me, would be refusing to spend anything on christmas, a real miserly scrooge, but not willing to give the *time* either. I think if your children can see that OS just means being more generous with time rather than money, and making your money stretch further, it'd be a good lesson for them to learn, if they haven't already. god knows its one i wish i'd learned years ago.

hugggggss

keth
xx