Should I sell or can I budget?

ABN

careless wrote:

you really can't get much for £200 apiece when they're past the kiddy toy stage.

What absolute twaddle. Sounds like you have been brainwashed by consumerism and unless you spend lots you feel you will be looked down upon (You can’t buy love).

Christmas is not about spending as much as possible; the giving of something that has some personal meaning is so much better.

If what appears to be your philosophy is carried over in the other areas of expenditure then it’s not surprising that your living above your means.

Alleycat

Wow, £200 per child!! If its gadgets they're into, they don't need a playstation or whatever each. One between them with enough controls to share. Or a board game each (£20), bike (£50) as a main present etc.

seven-day-weekend

I would cut Christmas right down and do £50 each for your children (and I think that's a lot!) and nothing/card for everyone else except parents. It's not about buying tons of presents for people who, on the whole, couldn't care less whether you bought them or not. We stopped buying them when my husband went to Uni; just told people we couldn't afford them and then never started again.

My husband was a teacher too, so i know what a pain it is to have to have school holidays, but what about a camping holiday? We went on them for years, never went abroad, (although you could do France), they are cheap and the kids love them.

I agree with others that if you have this much left after paying DDS and can't manage then you need to seriously cut back in non-priority areas. Then you WILL have money left for fun!

careless

ABN wrote:

What absolute twaddle. Sounds like you have been brainwashed by consumerism and unless you spend lots you feel you will be looked down upon (You can’t buy love).

Christmas is not about spending as much as possible; the giving of something that has some personal meaning is so much better.

If what appears to be your philosophy is carried over in the other areas of expenditure then it’s not surprising that your living above your means.

ABN I have to refute this. Though I can see how you have come to your conclusion, I absolutely don't feel I have to spend lots or I won't be loved! As I said earlier, my children get a tiny fraction of what their friends get and they don't moan precisely because we discuss stuff like this with them. Their friends get far more pocket money - that they DON'T have to work for. If mine don't do their jobs, they don't get paid. We do not try to keep up with the Joneses as they have horses, 2 cars etc etc. We also couldn't care less that we don't keep up with them - and neither do they!;)

We are not into materialism as you are suggesting. What we want is leeway to travel and see the world.

hex2

Come on people- be nice.

Careless - it is your choice to set your financial priorities and the things that matter to you. What you need to do is allocate priorities and then direct your money to the things that matter to you most. I think you are doing that already.

I bet you can do those holidays for less if you book the bits direct, although I appreciate the point about school holidays. Try and think outside the box - not hotel in greece. Do a search on martins flightchecker for the weeks you want, see where is cheapest, find a cottage on the web and go and explore. Cant wait till mine are big enough to do this.

Come on over to old style - they will positively help you to reduce your food bills. I spend a lot less than I did and the standard of eating has gone up.

clutton_2

have you thought about remortgaging onto a different cheaper mortgage product at a better interest rate ?

Prudent

You do have plenty of leeway with that amount of money.The best tips I have learnt from being on this site are:

1) set a weekly cash budget and only use that cash. When it runs out, it runs out. I started this with food. My initial aim was to get my budget down from around £160 - £120 per month. I put £30 per week in my purse for food. It worked brilliantly because I was afraid of running out and held back on spending. By the end of the week, I regularly had money over. It made me use the things in the fridge I would normally throw out.

2) get a pressie box. Lots of mser's have one. I make a list of the people I need to buy Christmas and birthday pressies for. When I am shopping I buy good bargains, sometimes with specific person in mind, and put them in this box. I now get most of this at car boot sales, and other than my parents and daughter only spend under a fiver each for pressies that would cost £30 -£40 in the shops. Craft items and jewllery are good choices because you can buy nice packaging and they look like they have come from an exclusive gift shop.

3) Go to boot sales. I got regularly and save a huge amount this way. This weekend I got a bed headboard and beautiful throw for a bedroom I am doing up for £9 total. Seen both identical products recently in shops -total £127.
If you have children, boot sales are especially good as so many people are trying to clear the children's clutter. It is common to get new, unused children's clothes. I found my daughter loads of designer top/ trousers at one, most still with labels, and they were being sold for 10p each. One pair of the trousers alone we saw online at £55!

4) systematically target each area of your outgoings from mobiles to electricity and get advice on the relevant board here.

I now spend £850 average per month including all bills (plus I budget a further £100 for car depreciation). I live very well. I could reduce this further if I sold on ebay... so that might be my new years' resolution.

Keep going with this and you will be looking to invest your surplus!

Julysea

Do you have to go abroad on holiday? We always go to a coast in England and it usually costs less than 400 quid for a week for all 4 of us, including travel and spending money. And what about the car? Do you really need one? Could you get by without or sharing one with a family member or joining a car sharer's club?

sm9ai

careless wrote:

Ok I'm going personal...bear with me for the house bit.

I am married with 3 children. I run 1 car. I am trying to work out a budget using Martin's plan.
After monthly direct debits, I have £1781 left to pay for food (£541), diesel (£160) children's activities (£175 all in), holidays(£250), Christmas (£150), birthdays (£80), clothes (£100), car tax/insurance (£45), doing up the house (endless) odds and sods(varies) and fun (no money left for this!!). I am always skint yet I think nearly 2K should be plenty.
What am I doing wrong?
The upshot is that I may sell up to lower my mortgage and have more left after direct debits but should I have to or am I just planning it all wrong?

Please be as blunt as you like - I'm so stressed I've lost all sense of perspective. I can't believe I can't manage on nearly 2K after monthly bills.

£160 a month in diesel means you should be doing around 2200 - 2300 + miles a month.

If you are then find ways to cut back your mileage, if you are doing a lot less than that then you need to significantly change your driving style/car.

Where abouts do you shop for food/clothes?

You spend far too much for Christmas and Birthdays. What sort of things do you buy?, where do you buy? Have you tried price comparism sites like pricerunner and kelkoo?

Earning that much you should have money to treat yourself on some areas, it does seem like you are treating yourself on all areas. (apologies if I'm wrong!)

seven-day-weekend

careless wrote:

ABN I have to refute this. Though I can see how you have come to your conclusion, I absolutely don't feel I have to spend lots or I won't be loved! As I said earlier, my children get a tiny fraction of what their friends get and they don't moan precisely because we discuss stuff like this with them. Their friends get far more pocket money - that they DON'T have to work for. If mine don't do their jobs, they don't get paid. We do not try to keep up with the Joneses as they have horses, 2 cars etc etc. We also couldn't care less that we don't keep up with them - and neither do they!;)

We are not into materialism as you are suggesting. What we want is leeway to travel and see the world.

Careless, I accept what you say and believe that you do not care about keeping up with the Jones's.

However, you and the Jones's must live in a very rich part of the country, because believe me, where I come from in the UK (West Midlands), not ONE of my friends or other people I know would dream of spending anything like £150 a month on Christmas presents - that's nearly two grand a year!:eek: You could pay a whole chunk off your mortgage with that!

(In fact, I personally would try to get the whole of Christmas done for one of your monthly instalments, but I know I'm a cheapskate where Christmas is con cerned and wouldn't expect anyone else to be quite so stingy).

I think, realistically, you should aim for around half, at the most, of what you spend on Christmas and Birthdays.

Childrens' activities seem a lot as well, but it's a long time since I had to pay for these, so they may all be far more expensive than they used to be.

Good luck, and I'm sure you won't have to sell your house. However, you may want to move to a cheaper area away from those Jones's!:rotfl:

Cuts have to be made somewhere and no-one can have everything. I'm sure if you drastically cut down on your Christmas/birthday spending, then you'll have the money to travel and see the world.