Church Flowers

Bluespirit

OH and I met with the florist we're using about our flowers at the weekend. We're getting married in a church, which OH goes to along with the rest of his family, and since he isn't the best at visualising things, we asked MiL2b to come along to discuss the flowers with us, as she knows the church. I'm not religious at all so I've only been in the church once, and wasn't really sure about what would work.

As we were trying to keep costs down, our florist had suggested that she could do flowers that would work in both the church and our reception venue, and we could ask our ushers to move them after the ceremony. MiL2b was unhappy with this as she felt we should be leaving the flowers in the church, so as a compromise we agreed to have 2 arrangements made for the church - one which would go on the altar, and would then be moved to the top table afterwards, and a second slightly smaller arrangement for the table where we're signing the register which could be left in the church. OH and I were both happy with this. The florist has done weddings there before, and said this is a normal thing for people to do, and in fact my sister did something similar at her wedding.

However, then MiL2b brought up getting a woman in the church to do the flowers for the church, and tried to sell it to us by saying it would only cost £200, and they were not making any profit out of it as anything not spent on flowers would go to the church fund. If we did this we wouldn't be able to move any of the flowers, and the £200 is more than double what the florist is charging us. I'm really keen to use the florist as she is a family friend who is giving us a good deal on what we want, trying up our flowers so that we can give them to people to take away at the end of the night, and does it professionally. Plus I'm not keen on giving more money to the church. We're already paying a fee for getting married there, and inviting the priest for the wedding breakfast. I have quite strong views against the church in general because of some of their beliefs, and the only reason we're having a church wedding is because it means a lot to my OH, so I'm not keen on giving the church even more money.

Just really wanted a big rant about it. :mad::mad::mad:

LEJC

I had exactly the same...although my sister was the florist and it was the church who kept pressing me to have their lady do the flowers and those of a later wedding that was taking place that day....traditionally people did leave their flowers for the church to enjoy but that was before flowers became quite expensive and people became more able to move the flowers around...
Consequently my sister did my flowers very beautifully in the church and afterwards they were all moved by the ushers to the reception venue...
Perhaps you could suggest to your mother in law if its the church she attends that she would like to pay for the church flowers at your wedding and then she can gift them to the church afterwards...
stick to your guns thou...its more than acceptable to take your flowers with you!

missknixon

I found that at our local Church they EXPECTED you to use their florist and EXPECTED you to leave them there - £450!!! Yeah right! It was far too expensive for us to get married in the Church as they charged everything individually! Having arranged flowers in the church where I grew up for many years I have always thought I would leave some flowers for the Church but £450 for flowers I couldn't see again! NO chance!

Stick to your guns - your guns - do not be pestered into it! I agree with the post above - if she wants that she can pay for them!

Lexxi

I was told there would be flowers at the church anyway and if I wanted the florists number as some brides use her for there other flowers. We said we'd cover the cost of their arrangement as I didn't want any extra, I was expecting £100 for one arrangement but the church only pays £20!! I think flowers do reflect what you spend up to a point, can you explain to your mil2b that your budget doesn't stretch that far? If I had to pay £200 for Flowers id want the money going on the flowers, you wouldn't give the dress maker £500 and what she didn't spend on the dress she got to keep!!

Bluespirit

Thanks all. MiL2b is retired, so has already told us they can't contribute to the wedding, and when we got engaged said she wouldn't interfere - well there's the flowers, and the band, and the fact that we don't want the church choir that have all met with negative comments for her, and comparisons to her other son's wedding and how it's not what they went for.

I have tried explaining to her that various things are not what we want, and that it is our wedding (as nicely as possible), and she then agrees that it is up to us, but as soon as she gets OH alone he's getting pestered with comments from her. I'm determined that we're not going with what others want because we're paying for it, but it's just so difficult.

Missknixon - I can't believe they wanted £450 from you - that's absolutely crazy!

mrsW2b

Am I the only one not having flowers in the church?

Our church is so cute and tiny that its beautiful alone and I thought by the time you cram everyone in in their pretty frocks and such, the flowers would be wasted......

U could have one at the alter and see if I can take this with me perhaps but I did think they charge so much for flowers that for me, will go unnoticed as I hope everyone will be too enthralled in our ceremony.

Am I being really tight? What are your thoughts?

sophievenusdoom

Bluespirit wrote: »

OH and I met with the florist we're using about our flowers at the weekend. We're getting married in a church, which OH goes to along with the rest of his family, and since he isn't the best at visualising things, we asked MiL2b to come along to discuss the flowers with us, as she knows the church. I'm not religious at all so I've only been in the church once, and wasn't really sure about what would work.

As we were trying to keep costs down, our florist had suggested that she could do flowers that would work in both the church and our reception venue, and we could ask our ushers to move them after the ceremony. MiL2b was unhappy with this as she felt we should be leaving the flowers in the church, so as a compromise we agreed to have 2 arrangements made for the church - one which would go on the altar, and would then be moved to the top table afterwards, and a second slightly smaller arrangement for the table where we're signing the register which could be left in the church. OH and I were both happy with this. The florist has done weddings there before, and said this is a normal thing for people to do, and in fact my sister did something similar at her wedding.

However, then MiL2b brought up getting a woman in the church to do the flowers for the church, and tried to sell it to us by saying it would only cost £200, and they were not making any profit out of it as anything not spent on flowers would go to the church fund. If we did this we wouldn't be able to move any of the flowers, and the £200 is more than double what the florist is charging us. I'm really keen to use the florist as she is a family friend who is giving us a good deal on what we want, trying up our flowers so that we can give them to people to take away at the end of the night, and does it professionally. Plus I'm not keen on giving more money to the church. We're already paying a fee for getting married there, and inviting the priest for the wedding breakfast. I have quite strong views against the church in general because of some of their beliefs, and the only reason we're having a church wedding is because it means a lot to my OH, so I'm not keen on giving the church even more money.

Just really wanted a big rant about it. :mad::mad::mad:

It is difficult when it comes to mothers, and mother in law's, but sometimes you just have to put your foot down and say that you are not compromising on everything. After all, it is YOUR day, and you should be the one who decides on what you want!

Lexxi

mrsW2b wrote: »

Am I the only one not having flowers in the church?

Our church is so cute and tiny that its beautiful alone and I thought by the time you cram everyone in in their pretty frocks and such, the flowers would be wasted......

U could have one at the alter and see if I can take this with me perhaps but I did think they charge so much for flowers that for me, will go unnoticed as I hope everyone will be too enthralled in our ceremony.

Am I being really tight? What are your thoughts?

I wasn't going to have any at all as I get really bad allergic reactions, I'm going to be snotty enough from all the crying never mind sneezing from the flowers too, I'm not a flowers person and they were probably the last thing on our budget, but as the church is going to have them anyway we thought we would pay for them, I've put a bit extra to it but we're not being extravagant or anything, I was wondering if I should have pew ends or something but I don't think people will actually notice, we're getting married in a church so they won't be there that long, I was thinking money might be better spent on hand warmers as it's a November wedding!

Sammy85_2

i cant believe church flowers are £200!! I hope they are covering every possible surface for that and not just your two pedestal arrangements.

I am doing my own church flowers with the help of some lovely ladies from another church (ours doesnt have a resident flower lady!). Ive been helping them at their church to do wedding flowers this year in an effort to improve my skills. All the flowers are bought in from the supermarket, usually the finest range or equivalent, so £10-20 a bunch. One bunch easily does a large pedestal arrangement and usually has enough left over to do a window arrangement or a couple of pew ends. The foilage required is all obtainable for free, from gardens, hedgerows and the church yard.

We are doing 4 pedestal arrangements, 8 window arrangements, 8 pew ends and an arrangement for the register signing table. That should in theory cost around £120 in flowers. all the sundries such as foam etc are already in the church and are reusable.

It is normal for flowers arranged by the church to be left there after the wedding, especially when only being charged the cost of the flowers and not for the time and effort put in, but if you are paying someone to come in and do it, then you should be able to take them away with you, although i would leave one arrangment to be used as altar flowers.

Maysie

We saw the vicar last week . I was asked about flowers and handed a leaflet i said i am not a flower person. Then i opened it...........
option 1 2 pedestals small arrangement on register table £135
option 2 2 pedestals large arrangement on the font small arrangement on register table £195
option 3 4 pedestals 2 arrangements on window ledges small arrangements on register table £295

On one of the other leaflets its says Any flowers you provide must remain in the church after the service.

No way am I paying over a hundred for some flowers i will barely see. My head just tots up what i could spend that amount of money on instead.

Sammy85_2

Maysie wrote: »

We saw the vicar last week . I was asked about flowers and handed a leaflet i said i am not a flower person. Then i opened it...........
option 1 2 pedestals small arrangement on register table £135
option 2 2 pedestals large arrangement on the font small arrangement on register table £195
option 3 4 pedestals 2 arrangements on window ledges small arrangements on register table £295

On one of the other leaflets its says Any flowers you provide must remain in the church after the service.

No way am I paying over a hundred for some flowers i will barely see. My head just tots up what i could spend that amount of money on instead.

Thats rediculous. Have a go at doing them yourself if you want flowers (its easy and loads of videos on the net you can follow step by step)

Failing that, buy some second hand fake flower arrangements off ebay. There are some stunning ones on there and not badly priced either.