Usage of child maintenance

Hornyrhino

I wondered if somebody could clear this up for me.

What should child maintenance be used for? The reason I ask is I recieved a call from my sons father yesterday to say that on his days off he would no longer be driving the 15 minutes down the motorway to collect our son from school anymore. (As it costs too much petrol apparently). Nice eh? He barely sees his son as it is, and so now it will be even less.

So now im having to try and arrange for a childminder to do school pick-ups for me whilst I am at work. Should the maintenance my ex pay me used for childcare costs?

Many thanks in advance.

DX2

Hornyrhino wrote: »

I wondered if somebody could clear this up for me.

What should child maintenance be used for? The reason I ask is I recieved a call from my sons father yesterday to say that on his days off he would no longer be driving the 15 minutes down the motorway to collect our son from school anymore. (As it costs too much petrol apparently). Nice eh? He barely sees his son as it is, and so now it will be even less.

So now im having to try and arrange for a childminder to do school pick-ups for me whilst I am at work. Should the maintenance my ex pay me used for childcare costs?

Many thanks in advance.

Do you not get childcare costs with your working tax credits?

When I finally get child support, it will be spent on fags, booze and just about any non relevant junk I want :whistle:

AnxiousMum

Child maintenance is A PORTION of what is required to raise a child financially. The other portion, comes from the residential parent.

Quite simply - the costs of raising a child include a portion of rent/mortgage as you obviously need a home large enough for the children to reside in - otherwise if no kids, you wouldn't need a place of the same size. There is a cost of electricity, heat etc., as obviously you would use that differently too if no children in the house. There's the extra transportation costs - running them here there and everywhere. Food - well, they do eat food! Clothes - but how much you spend on that (ie do you give in to designer wear and nothing but top brand items, or do you budget that as everything else) is totally up to you.....and the dreaded child care.......a huge cost in the younger years if you work.

Child support TOGETHER WITH contributions from the residential parent cover these things, and you need to budget accordingly, just as if both parents were still together - you would live within your means. Remember child support is not ordered in accordance with your outgoings at the current time, but based on the income of the NRP at the time, and could stay the same or change throughout the child's childhood - ie, just like salaries - I didn't get more when my kids needed childcare......I just had to budget it in.
Do you get WTC childcare portion paid? That could likely be some help.

AnxiousMum

DX2 wrote: »

Do you not get childcare costs with your working tax credits?

When I finally get child support, it will be spent on fags, booze and just about any non relevant junk I want :whistle:

Well........that's what SOME would say! lol

DX2

AnxiousMum wrote: »

Well........that's what SOME would say! lol

Thought I would pop in before others did

DUTR

DX2 wrote: »

Do you not get childcare costs with your working tax credits?

When I finally get child support, it will be spent on fags, booze and just about any non relevant junk I want :whistle:

:rotfl:don't forget the tattoo's and piercings,
but yes, you have both put the OP right :j

Soubrette

If it is really about the petrol costs, wouldn't it be better for you and your son if you offered to pay towards it?

Your son still gets to see his Dad and it would surely be cheaper for you to pay for petrol than a childminder?

As to your questions - it's up to you what you choose to spend child maintenance on. I personally think that if there is any extra (after essentials such as roof, clothes, heat, hydro etc) then spend it on whatever you think benefits the child most.

DX2

DUTR wrote: »

:rotfl:don't forget the tattoo's and piercings,
but yes, you have both put the OP right :j

I know tramp stamp here I come :rotfl:

Hornyrhino

Thanks for your replies everyone.

I currently live in a small 2 bed house, nothing extravagant. I drive an old run around. I rarely buy any new clothes for myself or treat myself. My son is dressed in clothes from Primark and George, nothing designer(unless his nanny and grandad treat him). All my money goes on my son, and what extra money I get I save hard to take my son on on holiday.

I do receive some help towards childcare, to the value of £65 a month. I have to save that up so I can pay for holiday clubs for my son during the school holidays, so I can carry on earning.

His father on the other hand earns £30k,more than double than me. He drives a near new Volkswagon Jetta. Cries poverty and yet is in new designer clothes everytime I see him, or new trainers, or has a new tattoo on his arm.

He currently doesnt pay me the amount he should be paying me, but I will be getting in touch with the CSA to sort that. So I am loathed to pay him petrol money to pick my son up...

Thanks again for your advice.

DUTR

Hornyrhino wrote: »

Thanks for your replies everyone.

I currently live in a small 2 bed house, nothing extravagant. I drive an old run around. I rarely buy any new clothes for myself or treat myself. My son is dressed in clothes from Primark and George, nothing designer(unless his nanny and grandad treat him). All my money goes on my son, and what extra money I get I save hard to take my son on on holiday.

I do receive some help towards childcare, to the value of £65 a month. I have to save that up so I can pay for holiday clubs for my son during the school holidays, so I can carry on earning.

His father on the other hand earns £30k,more than double than me. He drives a near new Volkswagon Jetta. Cries poverty and yet is in new designer clothes everytime I see him, or new trainers, or has a new tattoo on his arm.

He currently doesnt pay me the amount he should be paying me, but I will be getting in touch with the CSA to sort that. So I am loathed to pay him petrol money to pick my son up...

Thanks again for your advice.

To be fair, I was driving 60-80 mile round trip 3 or 4 times per week paying for after school clubs and other activities, had a 3yr old Golf and then a brand new one, with the Mum being eligible for this that and the other, she was better off than if she was working £30k per year,she actually done me a favour by going to the csa as I was paying less than what I was outlaying previously I don't sport tattoo's, but now mortgage free earlier than planned :cool:, and hoping to continue with a no headache lifestyle .

To be honest , I'm worried that the issue is not really about doing the trip to pick up his lad but a 'power' struggle between the two parents

Hornyrhino

Its certainly not a power struggle....no infact, it is ....a struggle for me to get my sons Dad to spend more time with his 4 year old son. I would give anything for him to spend time with him. In the last 7 weeks, his Father has seen his son 3 times....and he lives only 15 minutes down the motorway. And no, I couldnt have driven my son to him before anyone suggests, as I have recently had surgery on my spine and was not allowed to drive for 5 weeks.

Im not one of these mothers that denies access or makes access difficult, ever. Its important that he has his father in his life (at least I think so, but his father thinks otherwise).

Always interesting to hear a fathers point of view like yourself DUTR, but my sons Father is not like you. Good luck with your mortgage free non headache lifestyle.