Is everything going to fall through now?

firstaspect

dizziblonde wrote: »

I know I don't get it all either (I'd have quite happily hidden below the parapet of it all to be honest). They've not demanded we insure through them but requested the insurance is in place I believe - hubby's is the one paying the mortgage, so I guess his is the priority - it's just me that's going to be an issue apparently. I'm inclined to just say fine, leave me without (hell it's not as if we have dependants since I keep miscarrying any propsective candidates) since, to be honest, I'm sick of being prodded and investigated by the medical bods at the moment - just terrified of repercussions if I do that. The lender's the ones who've suggested that it's all done this way and we're kind of wading through it all in the dark pretty much. Far as I'm concerned - I just want this new house to get away from the horribleness of the past and it just seems to be ongoing utter terror that we won't get the mortgage or we'll get gazumped or something or other... the structural integrity of the house is actually the one bit I'm not too worried about!

You only need buildings insurance, the lenders shouldn't be requesting that any life insurance is in place. They may push that it's a really good idea but it's not compulsary.

kmmr

Tell the lenders you don't want life insurance. They will always try and get you to buy it as it's a good money spinner for them.

In my experience they make it sound like its a prerequisite, but it's really not. When I get mortgages, they always say 'ok, I will now pass you to the insurance people' like it's an automatic step in the process. I always say 'yes, sure' to keep them happy, and then hang up after they transfer, but while I am still waiting in the queue!

Everyone's happy, and I get a mortgage!

Now, whether I SHOULD have insurance is another issue, and one I consider completely my choice.

jozbo

It sounds like you've had a really tough time and I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriages. Going through that and then the stresses of buying a house must be very hard work.
Why not leave the life insurance for the moment for you? In a year when you feel more up for being poked and prodded you can sort it out?
The home you're in has such an influence on your emotional state. When you go through traumas, after a while you just want to be in a new place, a clean slate. Unfortunately buying a place is never easy and stress-free by the sounds of things.
Just trust it'll work out - you will get a new house to live in, you won't have to stay where you are. It just takes lots of patience and one step at a time!

Janie2008

I'm in the same position as you, agency work and not a great deal of it. My husband has life insurance as if anything happened to him I wouldn't be able to pay the mortgage but I don't because if anything happened to me he wouldn't have any problem continuing to pay it. As far as I can see you are in the same position and you don't need any.

BlondeHeadOn

I agree with previous responses, you don't need life insurance for you. In any case, you are not going on the deeds and as far as they know are not earning anything and the mortgage is not using any of your earnings as part of the calculations - so what difference would it make to your mortgage if you did peg out? (to put it bluntly - sorry!:o)

Your husband will probably need it, you don't.

And the whole point of LI is that if your OH pegs it, the mortage is fully paid off anyway - so you still don't need LI yourself! (Again, sorry if too blunt! )

The buildings insurance can just be in your OH's name as well.

You poor love, it sound like you have had enough to cope with without the pains of house buying. Take a step back from this and let your OH do the necessary. You need some recovery time.

Hugs

poppysarah

You will be the same person even when you move. I think you should ask for counselling if you've not had any. I am sorry for your losses.

It might not help with the budget but you sound like you need a weekend away without any thoughts of house/insurance etc.

Grimbal

Aww hugs Dizzi!

Sounds like you're trying to think about everything all together & getting completely overwhelmed by it all.

The good news (& it is!) is that hubby has been approved for a mortgage. He has also got past the medical to get LA, so excellent on that as well. As previous posters have said, if you're not on the mortgage, you don't need LA: it's (primarily) there to pay off the mortgage if you die.

So, your finances are in place, and you don't have to have a medical as you don't need LA for the mortgage. Now take the house buying in similar small sized chunks: sort out the survey, and then deal with the results of that. Buildings Insurance comes later, on exchange (ideally), so put that out of your mind until that time comes.

I can completely sympathise with you about not wanting to be prodded and poked for yet another time. I too was TTC for a number of years, and at one point it felt like most of the West Sussex medical profession had seen my undercarriage. I'm sorry to hear of your losses, I never got as far as that, so can only imagine how painful that was for you ((hugs))

My advice would be to try to break the steps down into manageable decisions at the different time points. Perhaps even writing it down may help you get a clear idea of what needs to be done when, and make you see that it is all achievable?


Liz
x

dizziblonde

poppysarah wrote: »

You will be the same person even when you move. I think you should ask for counselling if you've not had any. I am sorry for your losses.

It might not help with the budget but you sound like you need a weekend away without any thoughts of house/insurance etc.

Nah - it's not that, it's needing the goal, the focus, the stuff to do that we need desperately at the moment to keep going - and you can't exactly throw yourself into DIY and interior decorating on a rented house which is magnolia only. We lost our hopes for the future when the miscarriages happened - this is really trying to start down an alternative future - even if planning out the future is no more exciting or exotic than what colour the lounge will be painted, it's more than we have at the present.

It's been a very dark year or so and we need desperately to move on - which is why I'm so flipping terrified this will fall through on anything (heard a guy outside speculating about gazumping the houses with sold boards on and nearly threw things out of the window at him - he didn't realize we lived on the street). Sounds silly but it's how we're getting through the mess that life's throwing at us at the moment.

Heck when we move we can even get another cat, or a dog or something - without having to beg and scrape to landlords!

gingin_2

You sound like us 2 weeks ago. Are you ftb's as well?

If it wasn't the life insurance, it would be something else in the process that you would be worrying about - you are worrying because you are stressed and you are stressed because you don't want to lose the house.

I'm not on our mortgage and it has made life easier. I was also terrified we would lose the house, firstly through gazumping and then secondly because the owner threatened to pull out at the eleventh hour because we were taking too long to exchange. You have to rationalise every negative thought and say that anyone who wants to lose a no-chain buyer, a fair way along the buying process, in a falling market, would be mad. We told ourselves that many, many times and it got me through a the sleepless nights!

Your solicitors aren't Goldsmith Williams are they?

We exchanged last week and the relief is immense. You are welcome to PM me if you need to vent.

azkaban420

Hi there, sorry to hear you're having such a bad time, and sorry for your losses..must've been awful, so virtual hugs are being sent your way...

Life insurance, as most have suggested, shouldn't be compulsory for you. Also, I have a feeling (but don't quote me on it) that if you HAVE to have it, you may be able to find someone who won't take pre-existing conditions into consideration. A bit like travel insurance? It's just a thought, so I'm not sure if the same would apply but it would be worth asking the question? I guess at worst the insurance would be more pricey, but they wouldn't need a full medical or anything? I also just did a quick google on 'life insurance + no medical' and several sites came up, so maybe that's worth a nose too?

Other than that, everything seems to be moving along well - I really hope it works out for you and that you are in the home you want soon

All the best,

Az