Father in laws House Sale delemer

bryanb

apatite wrote: »

I think you meant its.

Is that the plural of it?

Newly_retired

Sounds to me as if the OP has a full understanding of the situation and is asking for advice as to how to get the message across to FIL that he will have to pay for sheltered accommodation.
That is just a fact - I guess there is something on Age UK ( formerly Age Concern ) website that OP could print off to prove this fact.
There may be ways of postponing a move as suggested above - stair lift, carers etc + Attendance Allowance to help cover some costs. This could help convince FIL that he could still manage in his own home.
But maybe sheltered accommodation IS the right thing for him? We don't have enough information to criticise OP for" trying for force FIL to move". Maybe the time is right? Maybe there is local authority or registered social housing available specially adapted for his sort of needs, but there will undoubtedly be a waiting list.
Meanwhile he could put his home on the market and rent a flat or bungalow once it is sold. There will be plenty of money to last a few years. Once his savings ( money from the sale of the house) have dwindled he can get help with the rent and council tax.

McKneff

bendix wrote: »

I don't have a problem with greed per se, McKneff. It's a primal instinct.

What frustrates me is the abnegation of individual responsibility; the sense that other people should pay all the time, the sense that it's always someone else's fault or responsibility, and the shameless way threads like this appear with monotonous regularity. If I'm wrong, mea culpa, but this thread symbolises modern Britain - let's stick the old geezer in a home and get his house, and in the meantime the other mug taxpayers will pay for the old boy.

Me me me me me me, bloody me. It's always always about me.

couldnt agree more.
I had to smile when you said 'its always somebody elses fault'
I back my OH's van out of the drive one night, in a hurry, slightly hit the van parked at the other side of the road, most upset I was,My first accident in 35 years, i ran into the house, wailing it was his fault for not backing the van up the drive making me reverse it out.
:rotfl::rotfl:

regards
Annie

margaretclare

McKneff wrote: »

I think it stopped with our generation.

the greed that is modern life today is endemic.
And like you, I hang my head in shame sometimes at the human race.

Can I please join you on this?

savingforoz

margaretclare wrote: »

Can I please join you on this?

I'll join as well. People not taking responsibility for their lives and actions is a real bugbear of mine.

margaretclare

Newly_retired wrote: »

Sounds to me as if the OP has a full understanding of the situation and is asking for advice as to how to get the message across to FIL that he will have to pay for sheltered accommodation.
That is just a fact - I guess there is something on Age UK ( formerly Age Concern ) website that OP could print off to prove this fact.
There may be ways of postponing a move as suggested above - stair lift, carers etc + Attendance Allowance to help cover some costs. This could help convince FIL that he could still manage in his own home.
But maybe sheltered accommodation IS the right thing for him? We don't have enough information to criticise OP for" trying for force FIL to move". Maybe the time is right? Maybe there is local authority or registered social housing available specially adapted for his sort of needs, but there will undoubtedly be a waiting list.
Meanwhile he could put his home on the market and rent a flat or bungalow once it is sold. There will be plenty of money to last a few years. Once his savings ( money from the sale of the house) have dwindled he can get help with the rent and council tax.

You could be right - maybe the OP really does understand the situation. I just didn't think it was clear from the way he/she explained it initially.

I do know of many people who have come to this stage in their lives, less able to manage all that goes with having your own home - the redecorating, the garden, the stairs, the inconvenient bathroom, not having a loo downstairs etc. Quite a few people I know of resisted the idea of moving to somewhere convenient - it was the family home, it was where they'd brought up their children, it had all kinds of memories...often, once they did move, they found themselves freed from responsibilities which had become irksome and they discovered a new lease of life!

I live in an area which has a very high proportion of owner-occupiers and also a high proportion of older people, so it's quite usual to hear of someone selling up and moving into one of the sheltered housing complexes run by a housing association. NB: the council no longer gets involved in housing matters. We've visited some of them - DH acts as a volunteer for the local computer club and often goes to help someone sort out their computer problems at home. I used to go to a weekly keep-fit at one of the sheltered housing complexes and we even looked at a vacant flat there ourselves but we're not quite ready for it yet, it was a bit small. In 10 years' time who knows. Anyway, the people in these complexes seem to have a very busy social life! In one, they have daily afternoon tea when they all get together, and if someone doesn't turn up, assuming s/he isn't away on holiday etc, they go and check up. This is the neighbourliness that still exists among this generation, and which is so often lost elsewhere.

FIL could live very comfortably and happily in sheltered accommodation, have fewer worries and actually have fun, but he really has gotta realise that no one else is going to pay for it. The rainy day he saved for has arrived.

Bravepants

margaretclare wrote: »

You could be right - maybe the OP really does understand the situation.

We may never know, because I think you lot have scared him or her off!

smudger1946

I agree with BLT.
SM