Having kids but no car

ironman1

Hope this is in the right place, please move it if not!

Me and my gf have lived together for around two years now and are saving to get married. Just before we moved out we sold the car as we wernt using it much as neither of us drove to work as we live in London right next to a train station that takes us into the city.

We are planning on getting married in one or two years but really want to try for a baby soon, our first one. We aren't in mega money jobs but get by quite well and have a bit of spare cash every month and still go out and do the things we want.

My question is, mainly to fellow London living people is how difficult is it to have a baby but not have transport? Basically should I get another car? It just seems likely we'd need one if we had a sprog.

I really would love to avoid this as to us its bit of an expense we could do without, what with a Wedding to save for and hopefully our first child.

Are there any others on here who are in the same situation? Just want to know if it's do-able without having a car to run around in. We have plenty of public transport around our place and supermarkets and shops, most of the things we buy are online. I'm just wondering. Well i don't even really know what i'm on about!

Hope someone can help. It's just when we told a friend we were thinking of having a baby they were saying how hard it would be without having a car...

bexta

Hi, I'm not a Londoner, but I do have a baby, so understand what you're saying. A car isn't essential if you have a baby - although you will need a car seat to take your future baby in a taxi/ friend's vehicle, should you decide to not buy a car.

I guess you would have to think about things like where you would keep your car, what you would actually use it for ie visiting friends and family if they are out of London, maybe, and the additional expenses and hassle that owning a car brings. Would you be affected by congestion charges (sorry, not sure how it works)

Babies are quite portable, a decent quality pram and perhaps a baby sling/ wrap should be enough, especially if you have access to plenty of public transport. Hope that helps, and best of luck for your future baby!

PasturesNew

There are car clubs etc in London you can use. And whipcar.com will probably have a neighbour that has a car available when you need one.

B2B-2008

We have a three month old son and do have a car but my husband takes it to work so I am carless in the week.

We are in walking distance of everywhere I need to go at the minute, shops, health visitor, doctors etc and I have no problem getting about.

I get my big food shop delivered when I need it and then just get odds and ends when I need them.

I have been on the bus with the buggy and they only let two on at a time because of the space but if you fold it down they will also let you on. This will be easier when he is older. I am yet to do a train or tube but thats because I'm worried about the weight of my buggy but you will buy one knowing what you need it for. We got one that had the car seat etc and fits in the boot of our car.

The car is a godsend for visiting our parents as they live an hour and a half away from us and we go for overnight visits so everything but the kitchen sink comes with us at the moment.

But you get used to what you have my brother has never drove and has had two kids. He was always on the tube with them as he lived on the other side of london. And that was before internet shopping was available!

ironman1

Visiting family etc is no problem as both mine and her parents live within five/ten minutes away from us. Same as her brothers and sisters do.

It's just we're obviously not used to having kids to get about with. Suppose we'll see how it goes. She wouldn't be able to use a car anyway as she doesn't drive. This site always gives good advice, thanks

Surfbabe

I know this is going back sometime - but my parents lived in the outer suburbs of LOndon when they had me, they had no family near but they managed perfectly well with no car and with two children. This was the days before the internet so shopping was all done locally and every other day or as long as the shopping you could carry on the pram would last !!! We used to go on holiday all over the country by trains and buses with the pram and suitcases and would regulalry go to see grandparents an hour away by train.

I wouldn't worry about a car - think of how fit you will all be and how much money you will save. The other advantage is that you child will have no worries about using public transport - my two children had never been on a bus or train until they were about 11 as we always went everywhere by car - its been a sharp learning curve for them having to get used to timetables and public transport. Enjoy the freedom!

ironman1

Yeah hopefully we'll be ok. It's not just the expense of insurance etc again, it's also surviving for a while on just my wages. She gets three months full pay then it's back to work or half pay.

Not sure what sort of benefits we'd be entitled to, if any!

JoJoB

London is probably the best place in the world not to have a car - it's why me and OH never got round to driving, and now we've moved to East Kent we can't afford the cost of lessons/test/car/MOT/insurance/road tax anyway.

Public transport with prams is now easier than ever as you don't have to fold up buggies anymore, just wheel them on the bus. Only downsides are if there are buggies on already and you have to wait for the next bus. Another thing to consider is how safe you consider your area of London - I took DD on the bus through Finsbury park recently and it was full of aggressive maniacs, I felt pretty vulnerable with a little one. Tubes are do-able (just) if there are two of you to deal with steps/escalators etc otherwise it's a bit difficult.

For day-to-day life I've found getting around with one child using just public transport absolutely fine. Be armed with milk/juice/raisins/rice cakes/favourite toys in case of whingeing/tantrums. Where driving would have been nice is for longer journeys (family live up north), but now DD is 2 I think I will invest in a portable DVD player for long train journeys as a toddler on a train is even more of a mission than a baby.

Buying a travel system with a car seat that clips on to the buggy gives you some freedom in terms of being able to get the odd taxi when necessary. I managed to use my maxi-cosi car-seat until DD was around 18 months. Another 6 months on and it is possible to not use a car-seat for very short journeys in a taxi where a car-seat isn't available (important when going on holiday using public transport and you can't lug around a big heavy car seat every where you go - some places are not in walking distance or have a local bus route). I'm not entirely happy about doing this but for short journeys it's legal and sometimes the only option - this is something for you to consider.

Even doing the family shop isn't too bad if you have a local supermarket - a buggy can hold quite a lot of shopping draped over the handlebars or in its shopping basket (get a travel system with a big shopping basket if you can - I had a quinny buzz and it was useless in this respect). Though don't overload or it might tip up.

All in all I haven't found it too much of a problem!

ironman1

Anyone got any further advice on having the first of hopefully a couple of kids?

We are both 24 and have been together for four years. I'd love to get married first but what will be will be. We both love kids.

My fiance actually works with them so is very clued up.

My worry as ever is the money side. We have savings. But I really want to start something else in terms of a job. The building trade i'm in is going backwards, not much work about, drying up big time. I'm thinking should I wait and see If I can find something else and then have the baby?

Then you think how long will it take etc. I know we'd be able to cope. Our families both have plenty of children in terms of grandsons/grandaughters. They'd also help with buying clothes, days out and babysitting. I think we should go for it. I doubt there is a better feeling than being a mum/Dad, especially with someone you love. Sounds a bit soppy but true!

JoJoB

ironman1 wrote: »

Anyone got any further advice on having the first of hopefully a couple of kids?

We are both 24 and have been together for four years. I'd love to get married first but what will be will be. We both love kids.

My fiance actually works with them so is very clued up.

My worry as ever is the money side. We have savings. But I really want to start something else in terms of a job. The building trade i'm in is going backwards, not much work about, drying up big time. I'm thinking should I wait and see If I can find something else and then have the baby?

Then you think how long will it take etc. I know we'd be able to cope. Our families both have plenty of children in terms of grandsons/grandaughters. They'd also help with buying clothes, days out and babysitting. I think we should go for it. I doubt there is a better feeling than being a mum/Dad, especially with someone you love. Sounds a bit soppy but true!

Have you considered moving out of London? If your OH works with kids already it may be an easily transferable job (nurseries and schools are everywhere). We moved from London to the Kent coast and it was the best move ever in terms of lower housing/living costs etc - meant that we could exist on one income when we had a child for example. If we'd have stayed in london we would have been really struggling to pay for a decent place to live in an area with good schools etc.

bexta

Only you and your fiancee will know when the time is right. You are both nice and young, so time is on your side if you decide to wait for a bit. Retraining/ looking for other work might also be an option for you, if that is what you feel might put you in a better future position.

Kids are fab - hard work, but worth it! They're also as cheap or expensive as you make them. If you get caught up in the hype of '100 must buy things for baby', you'll spend a fortune - if you use your head, you'll figure out you really don't 'need' most of what is suggested. Definately worth asking your relatives what they found useful - you never know - they might pass it on to you!