Prep school vs state primary

sticher

'more confidence - vital for life IMO, it's all very well to say you should get on with anyone in society by mixing with them at school, but in reality he would be working in a middle class job with other middle class people'

All Doctors need to mix with all classes surely and the BEST doctors are the ones who can communicate properly with everyone.

foreverskint

sticher wrote:

'more confidence - vital for life IMO, it's all very well to say you should get on with anyone in society by mixing with them at school, but in reality he would be working in a middle class job with other middle class people'

All Doctors need to mix with all classes surely and the BEST doctors are the ones who can communicate properly with everyone.

Unless of course, you plan for your child be only working in the private health sector, or a barrister not dealing with chav criminals ( just a little joke)

I would love to be able to educate my children through the private system, but unfortunately funds to not allow.

I would think that it would all depend on the state schools in your catchment area, and also the private schools near you. Just because you pay for it does not necessarily make it good.

gingin_2

We sent our son to a pre-prep school at the age of 4. Our son is very lively (in a nice way) and we felt the small classes would benefit him, in fact it did the opposite and he really didn't "fit" into their ideal classroom environment which was quiet and studious. It was almost all silent work time with no constructive playtime, and I felt that at the age of 4 this was ridiculous, the kids were not allowed to be kids. My real bugbear was that I felt the children were treated as a business and that league table results and "appearances" were more important than the welfare of the children, I have never seen so many children crying coming into school than I did at that place.

We decided after 6 months just to take him out and straight away found him a place in a primary school, it is the best thing we have ever done for him. With regards to his learning he has been placed on an advanced learning program which we are thrilled with, the school is fairly well funded with dedicated staff who really put the needs of the pupils first. He mixes with children with special needs, children from different countries and children don't speak English as a first language, a true representation of "life" which again I feel benefits him and will make him more tolerant in the future.

Saying all of that I live in Cambridge where the Pre-prep schools are known to be "ruthless" as we have some of the best Prep/senior schools in the country and so many parents are fighting to get their children into them, it might not be like that in Surrey. We also have some friends in Surrey who have changed their son's school from Primary to Prep and are really pleased.

A final consideration is the fees. Although you have earn a good wage, the senior schools in our area are £14,000 a year so if you have more than one child it could really bite into your finances in the future.

Good luck

VickyA_2

Each child is different and each school is different. Why don't you look round a couple of "possibilities" and get a feel for the schools in your area.

I teach in a state junior school (soon to merge and become a primary school) where the children are generally well behaved, but I would NEVER send a child there (not that I have children). It is incredibly under-resourced, dated ICT suite, dark classrooms etc. However, other state schools in the area have had money spent in the right places - well resourced, bright, new equipment etc. It's up to you what you like and what the schools are like.

I was educated in the independent sector because my parents didn't like the feel of the local state schools. I don't regret having that education and maybe I didn't do any better than peers that went to state schools, but it was the right system for me as I was nurtured all the way through and encouraged in small classes. No matter how much I encourage and nurture my class of 30 little cherubs now, it's very very hard to give each child the nurturing and development that they need.

funky-footprints

gingin wrote:

We sent our son to a pre-prep school at the age of 4. Our son is very lively (in a nice way) and we felt the small classes would benefit him, in fact it did the opposite and he really didn't "fit" into their ideal classroom environment which was quiet and studious. It was almost all silent work time with no constructive playtime, and I felt that at the age of 4 this was ridiculous, the kids were not allowed to be kids. My real bugbear was that I felt the children were treated as a business and that league table results and "appearances" were more important than the welfare of the children, I have never seen so many children crying coming into school than I did at that place.

I agree with much of what you wrote about the area etc, but can say some of the above can be a typical school anywhere. My sons state primary school is the only one in the area that doesnt believe in coaching the pupils for stats as it gives a false reports.

earwig

hi to be honest is dosnt matter as it will depend on your child if a child want to learn they will and if they dont want to you could send them to the best school in the world and they wont do as well as you hope at my state schooll people left and went on to become managers and done very well for them self some even become teachers while others have never done a days work in there lifes

bobsa1

Both my older 2 children have been privately educated from the age of 4. Planning the same for dd3.

We live in an area with a good catchment school, however it is very large, 4 classes per year from reception and to me that is just too big.

DD's school has max 22 per class and is a very small homely school 4-11yr age group.

Both of the older children then moved on to prep and dd1 is now in senior school.

One thing to bear in mind is that senior school we chose has an intake of 100 at age 11. There are 75 children in the junior school (usually all get places) so very few places available for others at age 11 (220 sat entrance exam for 25 places). It might be worth looking at the quotas etc.

Janepig

One possible advantage of choosing a private prep school instead of waiting until your son is 11 is that he may end up staying with the same friends through prep school and on to private school, whereas if he goes to a state primary he may be the only one going on to private school at 11 and will miss his friends. Or maybe you don't feel that would be an issue. I don't know.

Anyway my brother was privately educated locally and totally threw the opportunity away. He just went to school to socialise and came away with nothing. I didn't want to go there, although I could have, and went to a local comp - and came away with very little. Looking back I wonder if I made the wrong choice because I used to be annoyed with my brother as my parents weren't loaded by any means and I felt he was wasting their money. If I'd have gone there I'd have felt I had to work hard because it was costing my parents.

Don't know if that's any help but I hope it makes sense.

Jxx

Rosie75

whambamboo wrote:

it's all very well to say you should get on with anyone in society by mixing with them at school, but in reality he would be working in a middle class job with other middle class people

I'm curious as to what you'd define as a "middle class job" and "middle class people". Do you mean the kinds of jobs that the majority of people of this forum are likely to have?

cannyscot_2

My eldest was privately educated at a good prep school moving to the Junior school at 7. When my younger one started we felt it was all wrong. We moved to an area with great schools, and high expectations. The differences for us were;

PRIVATE
FOR

small classes
good resources
high achieving with little parental input.
School nurses,child encouraged to go to school no matter what so rarely bothered us in the working day.

Against
Quite a mix of people some with money but not much idea of good manners -often quite arrogant only interested in how big their 4x4 was.
Very high pressured-selective school
Very unprepared to deal with any child except conformists
Very long day -longer hours and had to travel a distance.


State
FOR
Good mix of people
Still stream English and Maths
Good resources and much more uptodate of new methods in Education
Shorter day-much better life balance -happier more relaxed children
More used to accomodating everyone.

Against
Needs more parental input
send them home for the slightest reason
had to pay to live in a more expensive area so have a slightly smaller house but bigger mortage

If I had the choice again I would send them to state but with two proviso's
1. You have to be prepared to be involved and keep an eye and if necessary provide support,tution , equipment etc
2. Move into good area and be ruthless in doing your homework.


I now feel this is the best combination, we live in a great,safe place with a good quality of life. The people the children mix with are mixed -Million pound and above house to a few from local authority housing, caretakers through to Surgeons, Lawyers etc. Generally all concerned parents with good attitudes.