my friend & her birthday money

kate1976

I am wondering if you lovely people could give me a bit of advice about a friend of mine, I've tried getting her to post on here herself explaining that you're not judgemental but she says she's not ready to open up yet and asked if I'd post on her behalf to get an answer to a question for her!

She's given me permission to give a little background on her, she is currently a single parent and on benefits, she suffers depression and has attempted suicide a couple of times due to her debt, although she isn't deeply in debt (less than me in fact) like all debt it does weigh her down, I've tried my best to advise her and used tips from this board to help her and she does cope well with a budget but she has missed a few payments off her capital one credit card and now she doesn't answer her phone or open letters from them as she's starting to go down again!

Anyway the question is she's recently had a birthday and received £480 from family and friends, she wants to know if she has a chance of doing a full & final settlement with capital one (she owes them £1100) If they refuse she will use the £480 anyway to reduce her debt but she said she feels stupid if she asks and they refuse, I told her that she's a faceless person to them and it won't hurt to ask but she's terrified that if she puts in the letter (I found a template from national debtline site) and they refuse then they'll harass her even more!

Does anyone know what kind of chance she has of doing the f&f settlement for £480? Also she wants to know if she has to put in the letter that it is causing her deep distress and mental health problems as the template says something about writing your circumstances!

Thanks in advance for any help you can give, I shall keep up with the gentle persuasion of her joining this site but at the moment I'm happy to post on her behalf!

LewisC_2

Hi Kate,

I'd certainly advise writing them a letter and detailing her distress. You may also want to remind the friend that these letters and reminders are all computer generated, and sending them a letter isn't going to cause any adverse reactions. The worst that can happen is they'll say no. Good luck

chevalier

The short answer is that I don't know. But even if they don't offer her a full and final settlement, she could at least use the birthday money to overpay her credit card debt. This would decrease the monthly amount she has to pay.


Is she getting all the benefits she is entitled to?
best of luck, depression is a !!!!! (am recovering also).

chev

rog2

Hi,
There is a letter template on the National Debtline site (link at top of page) in their sample letters section, which covers exactly this. I reccomend you use this.

BlondeHeadOn

And if you can, do try and get your friend to post on this site. I'm sure she will find loads of 'virtual friends' to help her, as especially if she's depressed this is a good and 'safe' way to make contact with other sympathetic people without too much effort. And even better, those sympathetic people are in debt too! and can offer help and support.

I know that she will be welcome here anytime.

:grouphug:

climbgirl

I'm not 100% certain about this but I thought full and final settlements were really only an option when it got to CCJ stage and was a bit further down the line than your friend's situation sounds? It's worth a shot I guess, they're only going to say no!

kate1976

Thanks for the replies, I shall call her later and tell her what's been said, I'll also tell her to take a look for herself that nobody has judged her, that may help her decide to post!

I'm unsure of F&F settlements so I don't know if it has to be at the CCJ stage, she's not at that stage but I'll tell her there is no harm in writing the letter anyway, as has been said they can only say no and she can still use the amount toward the debt!

Thanks again all, as people know it's not easy handling debt but the support people give on this site is marvellous and I'm sure my friend will be grateful for the advice you've given her!

Verbatim

Hope it works out for her.

kate1976

Just thought I'd update, my friend was turned down for the F&F but she did pay capital one her birthday money and she was so happy to have been able to pay off a chunk like that, she's much more upbeat about her debt now and is determined not to miss a payment again!

She thanks everyone for their advice and support, although she still won't post here yet (she seems to be forum shy!!) she wants you to know that she's glad there are some people who don't judge her and are willing to show support to a stranger, I have to agree with her, you people are fantastic and I can't thank Martin enough for setting this site up! Keep up the good work folks!:T

rog2

Well done - a good result for your friend - get her, at least, to visit the site - everybody (well most people) is welcome.

Kevicho

To be honest i think your friend will be wasting her time, no harm in trying but tbh i cant see the creditors accepting this.

From my understanding F&F settlemements only work in situations when the creditors now this is probably the best/only chance they have of getting as much money back as possible.

£620 is not much to pay back, so im sure if she puts a decent amount each month then she will be ok after a few months.

Well done on posting on behalf of your friend, the people here have probably gone through similar experiences, so she is not alone.

Plus also everything she posts will be anonymous

Wish her the best of luck