It's STILL tough and not getting better - so how are we coping?

EstherH

I do wonder how many people prepare their children for the realities of the world. How many grown up children living at home don't pay keep and are bailed out by mum and dad. How many teens were bought expensive trainers etc and everything that 'everybody else has got' and now or in a few years time wont know what has hit them.

It is tough for those who have been led to believe that going to university is their right and the only way. The last governments policy of 50% going to uni was IMO totally wrong and now we have lots of young people in up to their eyes in debt and unable to get the decent job that they were told they would walk into.

We struggled to bring our children up on one wage and then because of ill health benefits but they got paper rounds and Saturday jobs when old enough and saved to buy their own clothes and the extras they want. DD wanted to go on school holiday abroad and we agreed to pay half if she could save for the other half. Lots of friends had it all offered to them on a plate, but ours have more idea of the value of money now.

DD now has small rented flat, car and no money to spare. DS is back home after uni and at the moment can't afford to move out. I feel for them and wonder if they will ever be able to buy a house like we did when we got married, but as the discussion a few weeks ago went, is it better to buy anyway? I don't know any more, it would be nice to have the option but it isn't a right. As a mother I want to help my children to get on in life, but I know that out of the struggles comes character and strength.

Sorry for going on. I don't think there are any easy answers, but maybe less of the materialism will produce a lot less selfishness in society.

kezlou

Hippeechiq wrote: »

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:


Congratulations! :T Would love to try my hand at growing bell peppers and tomatoes next year, so if you've got any tips, that'd be great

Well the peppers i have no idea, first time i've grown them. The tomatoes this far have been poor due to lack of sun etc, its my second year of growing them. But my best advice so far is too feed the tomatoes and peppers with tomato feed as soon as they start to flower. I did this with toms last year and we had loads and i mean loads. We literally had dozens of fruit from one plant and were very tasty.

Gailey - cabbage work really well for swollen boobs, i did this when i weaned both of my boys off breastmilk.Sounds strange and weird but it does work.
jedi hope your okay hun (((hugs)))
annie56 :rotfl::rotfl:at your ex-OH
hi hellbells! and juliegeorgiana!

Me and my OH are in our late twenties / early thirties and we are finding it very hard. Its purely capitlaism/materialism/uncertain wages/lack if money which has put us both in debt. Its harder now than it was 15 years ago to get a job because of qualifications. Now my father also believes this, because he says "in my day you could just walk into a job, now you have a to have a piece of paper". But i do not blame the older geration, i blame the Thatcher years, i was born in 1982 in utter poverty. It was awful, my children now, have never gone without food, clothing, shoes. But i did as we had no money, not even enough for 2nd hand.

We have a car, its a banger, fourth hand, but its ours. No idea how were keeping it runnning, but unfortunately we have to in order to find work. Now it need sa new engine, break pads, tyres, but we can't afford another car right now. So its case of fxing it up and seeing what happens. Thats life.

Well i made weezl's yule log and it was fantastic!
Started back on with fixing DS2's bean bag today using old fabric. So hopefully it will be fixed and mended by tomorrow.
Also got some great news on Friday i might be able to get DS1's school trip for £15 instead of £116, because the school has managed to secure finding for children of parents who earn less than £16000 and have NHS exemption certs.. Fingers crossed we meet the criteria and voile a cheap school trip. :j

wagglessmells

i'm in early 30s but we were very poor when i was young and i had to get paperround and saturday jobs to buy things and in fact, bought my first car c/o paper round money!!!!! however, as i've got older, i have borrowed and got myself into debt but blame noone but myself!!! noone can blame anyone else and certainly not previous generations for their own borrowing. nowadays we use credit rather than saving as we cannot wait to get the latest things.....this is not our parent's/grandparent's fault!!! i do believe that a lot of parents today do spoil their kids and therefore this makes their children discontent as they think they are entitled to get everything but do not realise that it is difficult to purchase your first home and always has been and probably always will be!!! anyway, off to bed now cos bills won't get paid if i don't do my client's feet tomorrow!!!
night peeps
alex x

EstherH

tennis-free.com wrote: »

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EstherH

We belong to an 'instant' generation.

Microwave chips
Faster and faster computers
text messages sent and instantly received
etc etc etc

It follows that when credit is advertised in shops as 'buy now, no deposit needed' on large purchases, people were going to take it up.

Also the celebrity culture doesn't help, all the magazines that concentrate on celeb marriages have pushed up expectations for the wedding day and young people start their married life in loads of debt from 'the perfect day'. Of course real life isn't like it is in the magazines, and really from what I have seen of celebritys and I have to confess, not a lot because it all bores me to death, but they never seem to be happy for long anyway. None of their relationships seem to last.

pink_numbers

OH and I are seriously considering for him to give up his current job as we are increasingly worried that he is going to do some permanent damage to his body.

I realise this is a REALLY bad time to make such decision. We haven't made the decision yet, but I know we will have to pretty soon.

We already live much lower than our means, and I am very glad that we do because things are going to be tight until he finds another job!

*panic mode*

grandma247

kezlou wrote: »

Looked in my local Asian food store and everyone gone up. Lentils have doubled in price in the past month alone. So watch out when you go shopping next time.
Loads of people were complaining about it, the shop manager said its going to be even worse after christmas when the VAT increases start.:(. This is also the same for bulger wheat and spelt.

There is no vat on these foodstuffs but there is or will be a shortage supposedly due to the fires in russia and floods etc. elsewhere which results in higher prices.
I fully expect to see stupid statements in supermarkets etc in the new year saying they are not going to increase the vat on food, even that which does not have vat on it. They will try to con us as they already do so we need to watch for it and not fall for it.

TudorRose

dreaming wrote: »

I am a "tailend" baby boomer and can honestly say that life was not that easy for me & mine. My exH & I saved for a couple of years for a deposit for our first house (no 100% mortgages then and only 2x man's wage + 1x woman's), and furnished that mainly with cast-offs/2nd hand which was replaced bit by bit (by saving). Our wedding was lovely but not at all lavish and our honeymoon was a week at Butlins. When I had DS&DD (after 3 years marriage) I became a SAHM. Kids had 2nd pram/cot etc and lots of hand me downs, and I cooked everything from scratch. Our holidays were mainly camping (yuk) or caravan in this country but not every year. When interest rates went up in the 80s we got behind with mortgage and sold car to help pay arrears. It was only as kids became teens and I started part-time work (then later full-time) that we started to have better clothes, holidays etc. although looking back I think we paid as a family in loss of time. Now am divorced and kids grown - life is not too bad for me although I have just heard at work that our pension scheme (yes it is final salary) is in trouble and of course I don't now have the time to make alternative arrangements before retirement (although that seems to get further & further away). Yes it is hard for people starting out now, but only because expectations were raised to unsustainable heights in the last 20 years or so. Blame does need to be laid at bankers door with their 5x salary mortgage advances/handing out credit cards to all and sundry, BUT I also think some responsibility needs to be taken by a lot of people who, IMO, got plain greedy and saw house buying as a way to make money quick rather than making a home. I know Ceridwen and others have posted on the forums (not sure if this one) about how we need to return to looking out for others rather than just thinking "what can I get", and this credit crunch has been one almighty wakeup call for many. Unfortunately there are a lot of people who are paying a very high price for the excesses of the past couple of decades - quite often those who frankly don't deserve it. However, I believe these things are cyclical - whether over a short/long term - and unless there is a radical shift in society (at all levels) a similar scenario will likely occur again in the future. The credit crunch really isn't 1 person's, or 1 group of people's fault - just a combination of factors in which many people played their part, and although many people say they saw it coming - well, hindsight is a wonderful thing.
However,one of the things that cheers me up is how helpful everyone is here on the forums - helping others in adversity (despite their own problems) with advice and support. Long may that continue!

Well said! So many of the things you say about bringing up children etc in the 70's & 80's ring a bell with me. I am a tail end baby boomer as well (born 1955) and I keep thinking about what I can do to improve my lot when I retire but can't think of anything substantial that I can do but I do try to save money by careful shopping etc in the hope that every effort however small will help.

Off to work in a bit. With any luck I might get a customer today.

Have a good weekend everyone.

thriftmonster

Pink numbers - hope everything works out ok. At least you already have made some of the cutbacks.

pink_numbers

Thank you thrifmonster

It's pretty scary though as we will still have to cut our outgoings from £1300 to £700 :eek: It's 'doable' on paper, but not sure what it will be like in reality! £350 of the cuts are coming from stopping saving for mortgage overpayment, but huge chunks are being cut out everywhere, £50 here, £50 there. Food will be tight, but we have done 3 months on £50 per person per month earlier this year as a test (so glad we did it before, otherwise I think I would be peeing my pants right now!!) My food pantry (=2nd bedroom) is nearly full, so that should keep us going for a while.

I am worried that cutting our cash spending from £50 per person per month to £25 is going to be hard. I've been practising for this this month, by putting away half of my cash every week and living on £5 a week. Hopefully, this will not only get me used to living on £5 a week but also build a nice cushion of savings for when times get really hard.

:eek:

I will be clinging on to you ladies for my dear life! Everyone's knowledge here have been such a help to us so far, thank you.