It's STILL tough and not getting better - so how are we coping?

mardatha

I think disposable nappies are awful things. So wasteful and stupid. I never used them.

honeybun16

Once a month sounds good i like the fact that i was around when this one started this time, felt really good to be able to talk to you guys.

downshifter

Hello AlexRed and others, it's so nice to see some younger people on here, sometimes I've felt that many of us are maybe on the sexy side of 50 and that might put younger people off. Am I right in thinking we're also mostly women too?

But lovely to see that younger people are thinking sensibly and are resisting consumerism and the bad side of capitalism and looking for other ways of doing things.

Re the cloth nappies - mine had terry nappies, I hated disposables. The problem with my mother is that she was a slave to brands (still is) and when I bought zinc and castor oil cream bpc, she thought that was terrible and I should have Johnson and Johnson's or whoever. However, I have found disposable nappies to be wonderful when I've had my grandchildren to stay, though I would never put them in the bin - they burn nice and bright on the fire!!! But you could never beat a line full of sweet smelling white terry nappies a-blowing in the wind!!

Ds

pagangirl

regarding buying house v renting - I'm 57 this year and have never been able to afford to buy - always rented. Never had any problem, bonus is landlord does repairs (well if you got a good landlord they do) lucky as with housing association.

I still have 2 of the Shirley Goode books (well used too), will have a look around for the Bazaar ones coz didn't know about them - thanks to whoever mentioned them. (soz can't remember who)

Binky - hope you're feeling better hunny

Hugs

Patchwork_Quilt

Just wanted to say AlexRed that you may be swimming against the tide but you are being thoughtful and sensible and putting your child first, whatever other people say. The MSE way to bring up a child means more time spent together and that's crucial.

Rant over. Just wanted to say hello. I am lurking and enjoying everyone's posts very much. Our situation is that DH was extremely worried about his job a while ago - so much so that we built up a float in case it all went pear-shaped. The original company went down about four/five years ago with the loss of about 3000 jobs and only six of them were invited by the boss to start again. It has been an extremely hard slog for him, working all hours, to get the new company going although they are now employing other people. He does have a very good salary, which means that I can work part-time for a charitable company that has just given us all a 7% pay cut rather than lose staff. We have two lovely teenage children who don't ask for much. I think all this has taught us that we are extremely lucky for DH to have kept his job and that the future is not certain. Many of his colleagues have had to move to the other end of the country to find work and some have been in two or three places in the last five years, which I find very sad.

ginnyknit

Alexred,I know it can sometimes feel like you are swimming against the tide especially when people don't understand you. I lost a lot of friends last year because they simply didnt understand the phrase 'I have no money' I now realise they weren't worth all the effort I put in to be there for them. But you have now found somewhere that people do understand, are mostly in the same boat or have empathy for you. Feel free to rant ,ask questions or just wander through the boards, as I well know the people here have time for you.

gailey_2

Spendless wrote: »

gaily- Have you got a children's centre near you? Ours runs in the school holidays, often does trips that aren't expensive and you can take older siblings with you.

I didn't realise your children were young, so no some of the things I suggested won't be suitable. Though the first week or so can be 'OMG how am I going to entertain them every day for so many weeks', eventually it settles and not having to get them up and out in a morning for the school run is good. Does the baby have an afternoon nap introducing 'quiet time' for the older one- watching a dvd etc could mean some time for you to catch up with any jobs you need to do...or just take time to relax.

Do you mean surestart as theres a few but miles from me so never been.

Guess biggest stumbling block is no car so bus costs money so try and stay local.

i think my eldest will miss preschool and cant wait to start primary but thats staggered so wont be until oct shes fulltime and another half term then.

Its quite tricky balancing the 2 babys light sleeper and when eldest home she gets woken up a lot and sometimes refuses to nap.
We go out lots of walks as baby will sleep in buggy.
tv used to keep eldest happy but she gets bored quite quickly its fine for couple of hours after brekkie but then shes restless.
The garden can be hassle as soon as she sees anything tat flies she screams, she thrives on company and doing stuff.

usual pattern is

tv and toys in morning
after lunch we go out
dinner
bath/story

I too use cloth nappies and love them cant afford to spend 40quid as month on something we would bin.
Im lucky though as used with 1st so using again even better value, we get fornightly bin collections here so dity nappies in bin during summer not nice. Some people think i must be eco warrier but is purly money and fact they look cute.
I was picked to do presentation talk at antenatal group think i converted a few its getting more popular here.

I breastfeed as well which saves tonnes will continue until shes 1 maybe longer and then switch to cows milk.
Formula seems very pricey.

Yes some people make comments but I ignore especially my mam whos been unsupportive of both.

With my 1st went back to work fulltime and nursury were fine using cloth and others used cloth too.
.

honeybun16

Breast feeding number four here and love it, the money saving side of things is great too, tried the cloth nappies but keep going back to dispossibles unfortunately. seems so much easier but will keep trying as i keep finding the cloth ones leak which means extra washing and more clothing so does not always seem like a saving?

AlexRed

Souk08, Patchwork Quilt, mardatha, thank you for the positive words, this thread makes me feel that I am not bonkers.

downshifter - it does seem that most of the posters on this board are ladies, I think we are the more resourceful sex in some ways. I am 33 years old, feel as though I should belong to a different generation at times though, with my outlook on life!:D

Patchwork Quilt - thanks for the kinds words, I totally agree that time spent with children is precious. I do think that in general as a society we are very much focused on being cash rich and time poor if that makes sense.

ginnyknit - thank you for a lovely welcome, your message has bought a lump to my throat. I have also had some 'friendships' fall to the wayside over the past couple of years, with some not bothering because I can't afford to go out for girly shopping trips etc. You are so right that those kinds of 'friendships' are best left in the past without regret. Glad to have found a haven of like minded folk here. :T

xxxxx

AlexRed

honeybun - wow four children! I take my hat off am tired enough with just the one! I hope to have some more little uns so its great to hear from you. My little one shows no sign of weaning yet so it seems that I will be feeding him past a year and beyond but it is no hardship at all.

Regarding the cloth nappies, I have Tots bots and Motherease ones, I bought some of these brand new off ebay really cheaply as they had been taken out of the packaging but were unused. I also have some terries I bought new. I boost my nappies with 'bamboo boosters' also brand new on ebay and use Motherease wraps which I find bombproof, they are about £10 each but have seen some sold second hand very reasonably priced.

We did have a few leaks to start off with, I think that it can depend on babys shape also, there are good free instructions on different nappies and nappy folds on thenappylady.co.uk, this lady has free demonstrations on You Tube if that would be any help to you?

The thing I was worried about with the price of electrity at the moment was washing costs, I wash every other day but am lucky that I have a quick wash cycle that takes 35 minutes, and I do a quick cold rinse at the start also. I dry the nappies in my conservatory if the weather is wet rather than tumble drying. I find that good old terries dry the quickest!