really old style living?

seasalt_2

Not an "old dear" yet but I disagree. I don't think people in small communities are necessarily more small minded than anywhere else. In cities you often move within your own circles and don't have to spend much, if any, time with non like minded people, except maybe at work. Maybe your views aren't challenged as much as in a smaller community where you have to learn to get along (or not sometimes) despite your differences?

City folk are often quick to dismiss highlanders and islanders as "teuchters" but to me that shows a profound ignorance of gaelic people and culture and has been the complete opposite of my experience.

Also, I think most young people are desperate to move away from home at some point, wherever home is, and reinvent themselves - some return and some never do. The sad thing about many remote and rural communties, wherever they are, is that some of those who would like to return, can't because few jobs and nowhere to live that they can afford.

I can also think of one or two people who would, I think, lead much more lonely, ostracised lives in a bigger town or city so maybe this small community is more tolerant/accepting, less small minded?

And hey, I am still planning to dye my hair green - or maybe bright pink - when it starts to go grey!

ceridwen

seasalt wrote: »

Not an "old dear" yet but I disagree. I don't think people in small communities are necessarily more small minded than anywhere else. In cities you often move within your own circles and don't have to spend much, if any, time with non like minded people, except maybe at work. Maybe your views aren't challenged as much as in a smaller community where you have to learn to get along (or not sometimes) despite your differences?

That is true I think. In large urban areas you do only move within your own circles. I think probably pretty much the only regular contact with those outside ones own circle is at work and I must admit that I will be very glad when I no longer work because its not easy having to spend most of ones time with people with a very different mindset to ones own - it does get wearing always having to think twice/thrice/etc before opening ones mouth most of the time because most of the time most of the people around you think so differently. That is THE blessing of large urban areas - the chance of a reasonable size group of likeminded people nearby..

seasalt_2

ceridwen wrote: »

. That is THE blessing of large urban areas - the chance of a reasonable size group of likeminded people nearby..

Yes, i do agree with that, to a certain extent anyway. Good friends are precious and three times now, have made friends with people who have come for a few years and then moved away again either for their work or their partners' and I miss them - still friends but not the same as being able to pop round for a bit of toast and five minutes' blether after dropping the children off at the bus. (That can happen anywhere, I know.)

But I have also become friends with people I might not have done if I had not been living here.

mardatha

I think the problem of a small community (and my village is 33 houses plus scattered outlying big houses & farms) is that you cant just ignore them as you do in a city. You're forced to be nice and speak and get along. I loved having wee kids here but when they got to teenage age they all hated it - cos everybody knows everything and they have long memories LOL ! Now that we're in our 60s its good in that if the OH was ever taken ill again then neighbours rally round. His first heart attack was in a Jan and the whole street came out to help push the ambulance up the hill through deep snow

seasalt_2

So far, my teens are thriving - they are treated as individuals and as young adults (by everyone except me who still gets on to them about tidying their rooms!) - far less age segregation than in a bigger place, I think - although DD is desperate to get to the mainland this october break to spend some of her earnings and b'day money!

D&DD

I love to read and I love information thats probably why I like the internet so much!
I have been looking at my bulging bookcases recently and wondering about getting a Kindle/kimble whatever they're called :rotfl:
Would make sense as I'm fast running out of space but I like the feel of a book too..

Where I live its just outside London and very densely populated but where we are its almost like its own little world..There are over 2000 properties on my estate but it does work like a little village in that mostly everyone knows everyone else,most families have been here years/generations and everyone knows everybodys business:eek:

ginnyknit

I live on a large council estate 5 mins from Manchester city centre and I am quite isolated. I do know a few people from when I ran a charity shop round the corner but other than a few neighbours who say hello I don't really have much contact with the locals. They think we are different - mainly because 95% of them are career unemployed. Its not the kind of place where you nip next door to borrow a cup of sugar! I don't mind I am used to it after 26 years and Dh says in the winter 'ok pull up the draw bridge and lock the doors'

We have suffered many crimes, burglary, car theft, car destruction and animals hurt but have never been in the position to move so we just get on with it. We have lots and lots of friends who we keep in touch with but mainly we keep to our immeadiate family. As I have said before I helped run a huge goth community but their understanding of my new life with no money and a husband to care for was nil.

I am happy with my life and am very busy anyway but have always longed to live in the countryside and have had to come to terms with the fact that it will not happen so am creating my own little island right here!

mardatha

When I had the Goth website I found most of them were late 20s/early 30s with no kids and lots of money Ginny. But they didnt like spending it on others, mainly bought stuff for themselves.. I did ok at xmas with it

RAS

seasalt wrote: »

In cities you often move within your own circles and don't have to spend much, if any, time with non like minded people, except maybe at work. Maybe your views aren't challenged as much as in a smaller community where you have to learn to get along (or not sometimes) despite your differences?

I agree that this happens unless you try to mix your circles.

The old community association here was a real flog'em and hang'em brigade - anyone who lived beyond certain boundaries was regarded as a likely criminal. OK, there were occasional problems - like when the police cracked down on the dealers nearer to town and a few of the youngsters decided to relocate, but that was soon sorted.

It works the other way too; when we were juicing apples in a community centre there last year, I agreed to have a load of the pulp for my compost and the person delivering it had never been into the area in which I live, even though it is within walking distance (a mile or so).

Likewise, when I suggested to a couple of teenage bands living closer to the city centre that they send a few tracks to the local community festival committee (the opposite of the flog'em brigade) and try and get a slot on stage, they were startled.

seasalt_2

I do realise I am very lucky to live where I do, ginny, and would not want to go back to city living although I was also happy when I did live there. Or my unhappinesses were not to do with where I was living.

I am going to display my immense ignorance now and probably does make me sound like an "old dear" - I thought most goths were young teens - DD2 toyed with it for a while and we used to see them a lot in Glasgow - although maybe they're just more grown up goths now? These days she goes for a funkier art student image (although still quite a lot of black!) - fortunately a look that is best put together from vintage and charity shops! Sounds as if you and mardatha were/are really into it though. And I guess it's about more than just how you dress? I am intrigued.