Wedding wishing well ?

Cloves

I have given money at weddings before and I usually DO put it inside the card I am going to give them.
I wouldn't put in an anonymous card because :
- there may be ppl who give something ridiculous like £5 or worse yet - nil! ( you dont want to be mixed up with them!)
- they should be grateful for what you give anyway, theres no "shame" with them knowing what you gave them

I don't think it is rude to ask for money (we are moving overseas soon after we are getting married so i want cash too!), but putting a recommendation is definately a bit rude! Alternatively I think money vouchers/gift cards would also be good alternatives

hannahjex

That's really cheeky!! We've asked for money--not outright--we just didn't bother with a gift list and didn't mention gifts at all in the invites and a few people called and asked if there was a gift list or if we'd prefer cash to which we replied that we had all the homeware we needed but if they did want to give something, we wouldn't say no to a bit of cash or they could just be creative. We will have a gift table for those who prefer to bring boxed gifts as well, but the word has gotten round that we'd prefer cash. Wouldn't DREAM of 'suggesting' an amount though! A bit like those things that are 'free' but suggest a minimum donation of £X. How rude. Anyhow, if anyone gives us £50, I'd count that as really generous. And in her case, I'd be tempted to give her a tenner for her cheek. Doubt she'd dare say anything, but if she did I'd tell her I figured the extra zero was a typo!

RainbowDrops

I'd never dream of suggesting how much someone should spend on a gift.
I'd put a note in the well "suggesting" that they be grateful for the love and company of their gifts!

magicgirl

if someone dared put a suggested donation, i would refuse them any money. i am having a wishing well on account of the fact people keep asking us to give us gifts but it is still being kept inconspicuous and only mention of it is when people ask. we would never dream of asking for anything tbh and its disgusting they are asking that

in answer to your actual questiom, you would normally pt it in an annonymous envelope but with that amount, i expect people who do give it will want it noted so i would back right off!

magicgirl

just to make you chuckle, i told h2b and he said he would put £100 monopoly note in. :P

evie-mays-mum

Not being funny but £100 is taking the p***!!
It puts people in a really horrible position if they cant afford anything like that and the stress of it stops them looking forward to the day!!
Although i have to say that its not as bad as a couple that we know who actually sent there bank account and sort code details with the invites!!!!Obviously for there cheek they got mr and mrs beach towels!!

System

thanks for the replies i was beginning to think it was just me being a tight a$$ ,going to put about £40 in an anonomous envelope.

Birdie85

£100?!?! Blimey, the most I'd give is £30! We're grateful for cash, vouchers or presents but would never expect anything more than £20/£30 in any form, that's what we're comfortable giving so why should we expect any more? I don't like the idea of anonymous donations either, I want to know who to thank for their generosity! We're going to have a postbox but it is going to be marked for 'Cards' rather than 'Cash in envelopes so none goes missing!', I just think it sounds nicer and less expectant!

The last wedding we went to we were asked quite abruptly for cash so we took the hump (which we wouldn't have if they'd asked nicely and given a reason for it) and we bought them a popcorn maker!

NEH

Cloves wrote: »

I have given money at weddings before and I usually DO put it inside the card I am going to give them.
I wouldn't put in an anonymous card because :
- there may be ppl who give something ridiculous like £5 or worse yet - nil! ( you dont want to be mixed up with them!)
- they should be grateful for what you give anyway, theres no "shame" with them knowing what you gave them

I don't think it is rude to ask for money (we are moving overseas soon after we are getting married so i want cash too!), but putting a recommendation is definately a bit rude! Alternatively I think money vouchers/gift cards would also be good alternatives

I'm sorry but £5 to some is a lot of money not ridiculous at all....Just remember how much people have spent to attend a wedding don't belittle that contribution....

magicgirl

totally agree with NEH. we have invited a few uncles and aunties.. many of whom are pensioners and cannot afford the cost of travelling to london and staying in ahotel and attending a wedding. That is one of teh reasons we DIDN't ask for gift. we would rather they spent their money coming o see us but unfortunately, many cannot even afford that. we did look to see if we could afford to pay for these relatives ourselves but to do so would have meant not inviting children which was just as important so we had to compromise.