light at end of tunnel

LookingAhead

What a lovely post. Well done!

I echo debbycatz.....if you are able to let us know what you think you will do differently to avoid this awful debt scenario again, I'd be really interested to read it too.

Well done again though! :T :T

lightatendoftunnel?

Thats great news, well done!!!!! You have cheered up and give me hope. Once again Congratulations.

Nyquist

Hi everyone

Thanks for your lovely messages - you guys are great xx

Future?

Rule 1: No credit cards for purchases (stoozing is ok but hide the card). I just can't handle plastic so I never carry a debit or credit card when i go out. What's been working really well for me is taking out 50 in cash once a week on a Monday and then taking the card straight home again. If i get to Friday and I’ve run out of money - i don't eat till monday. hardcore system; but it works! when i've paid off my debt I’m going to increase it to 100 a week but maintain the system.


Rule 2: No Alcohol. I find that a quiet pint always turns in to five pints and one night a week becomes three or four so i just cut out drinking all together. Turn up at the pub drinking water and you leave early - because it's so boring! This has been very hard.


Rule 3. No girlfriend. I like buying gifts for the person I love and although I’ll be really good not buying things for myself all week i'll spend all my money on them in one go. i just can't control myself. In addition, I would never dream of going out for dinner or going on holiday when broke but my last few girlfriends have expected romantic dinners and foreign holidays. When i've said 'sorry i can't afford to do that' it's caused problems. I know not all women are like this and it's down to the sort of girls i've been meeting but you don't really find out about someone’s approach to money until you've established a relationship and become attached to one another. It's not first date conversation 'do you have enormous debts but still spend uncontrollably' - maybe it should be (?) In the case of the last three relationships they’ve been in worse financial shape than me. Don't get me wrong - they're totally entitled to do what they want with their lives and money, but so am I. So for me, safest way is to stay single at least until I'm financially in better shape. sad and lonely; but it works.

Rule 4: MSE works. i'm going to keep coming back! I love this website and I’ve turned round my financial situation by gaining proper perspective on my finances from reading the articles on here. I simply couldn’t have paid back so much money without the brilliant suggestions.

(sorry ended up being longer than intended)

melancholly

Nyquist wrote:

Rule 3. No girlfriend. I like buying gifts for the person I love and although I’ll be really good not buying things for myself all week i'll spend all my money on them in one go. i just can't control myself. In addition, I would never dream of going out for dinner or going on holiday when broke but my last few girlfriends have expected romantic dinners and foreign holidays. When i've said 'sorry i can't afford to do that' it's caused problems. I know not all women are like this and it's down to the sort of girls i've been meeting but you don't really find out about someone’s approach to money until you've established a relationship and become attached to one another. It's not first date conversation 'do you have enormous debts but still spend uncontrollably' - maybe it should be (?) In the case of the last three relationships they’ve been in worse financial shape than me. Don't get me wrong - they're totally entitled to do what they want with their lives and money, but so am I. So for me, safest way is to stay single at least until I'm financially in better shape. sad and lonely; but it works.

don't rule out a relationship.... you don't have to be lonely!! there are plenty of nice women who look after their money well - i wouldn't dream of sponging off my OH to pay for me!

well done on the debt though!!

bluezone

Nyquist wrote:

Rule 3. No girlfriend. I like buying gifts for the person I love and although I’ll be really good not buying things for myself all week i'll spend all my money on them in one go. i just can't control myself. In addition, I would never dream of going out for dinner or going on holiday when broke but my last few girlfriends have expected romantic dinners and foreign holidays. When i've said 'sorry i can't afford to do that' it's caused problems. I know not all women are like this and it's down to the sort of girls i've been meeting but you don't really find out about someone’s approach to money until you've established a relationship and become attached to one another. It's not first date conversation 'do you have enormous debts but still spend uncontrollably' - maybe it should be (?) In the case of the last three relationships they’ve been in worse financial shape than me. Don't get me wrong - they're totally entitled to do what they want with their lives and money, but so am I. So for me, safest way is to stay single at least until I'm financially in better shape. sad and lonely; but it works.

I asked my new fella this question within a couple of days. So that he wasnt at all like my ex my friends gave me a questionaire to ask him!!!

1) Any children?
2) Any debts?
3) Any crazy ex girlfriends?
4) Any trouble with anyone?
5) Anything else really bad in past?

Answers were no to all and felt better getting those out of the way

Verbatim

Blue Zone,

I had to laugh! Brilliant questionnaire. Brill friends and congrats on the new fella.

DontDoDebtKids

Nyquist wrote:

Rule 4: MSE works.

That is so true. Perhaps Martin should use that as a tagline?