How much should we each put into our joint account?

nottingham69

My boyfriend and i have been living together for a year, we both have equal amount of equity in our house, earn similar wages, and pay into a joint account to cover our household bills of £1900 per month. Because I have a teenager from a previous relationship my boyfriend worked out i should pay £1200 to his £700 per month even though my daughter's direct costs (pocket money, phone, clothes, holidays etc) comes out of my sole account. I was OK about this to start with but now I feel like I'm being ripped off. Is there a formula to work out who should pay what? I don't want to rip him off but it's now at the point where I cant afford to pay for me and my daughter to come on a family holiday! Help!

dzug1

There isn't a set formula - it's very much what you can agree between you.

It may very well be that there isn't a solution that both of you consider fair.

A possible approach is for you to go through between you each category of spending and agree if you can how to allocate it. There's a high risk you won't agree though.

My own value judgment on the situation is that if he's taking you on he should take your daughter on as well - but not all would agree.

[Deleted User]

Why not go through your last, say, 3 months of joint bank account statements, decide what spending was 50/50 between you, and see if there was any that was "only you", or was inflated due to your kid, and if so, by how much.

Then you can work out the percentages from there.

Judith_W

If he is determined to make it equal between all 3 of you with you paying 2/3, and you agree to this, maybe you should look at all the costs that are for all 3 of you, eg council tax, mortgage, water/ gas/ electric rates, TV licence, internet, food (excl treats eg him getting meals out with work etc). Costs that all 3 of you use. Split this by 3 and pay 2/3.

You may find that you should be putting less for 'bills' into the joint account that would be spent on him, by excluding mobile phone, extra for sky if it is for footie for eg, clothes etc, he may realise that he is not able to cover the little luxuries that he uses joint money for without realising.

Also make sure that any child credits etc you keep/ use towards your daughers bills.

In my opinion, he should be accepting your daugher as part of the family and happy to split things more equally - if he is intending to stick around for any length of time it seems self-defeating for you as a family because he will end up with savings and you will always be scrimping for the spare penny...?

Anyway, def a hard one - all the best

sueeve

Do you get any financial support from your daughter's father? If she is in school surely there should be something. I agree with the fact that your new partner should be thinking about you both as his new family, but on the other hand should he be paying over the odds for things for which her father should be paying?

getmore4less

£700 £700 £500 seems a bit skewed since a big chunk will be house purchase costs.

whats the breakdown of the 1900 total?

I would do it this way seperate the house purchase from the living costs.

House equity is 50:50 between you

So all costs related to that should be 50:50. so primeraly the mortgage but there are other costs any thing that adds value or is a capital purchase.

The house share.
Think of this as a 3 way on bills food etc. or perhaps a perhaps a 2.5 or something

Or another way is the DD is considered a bit like a lodger bills included(you pay her rent)

Whats the going rate for a lodger round your way that might be a fair assesment.

CAPTDAVO

I think you and your fella need to have a sit down and a coffee, your both earning similar wages so should split bills 50/50, your daughter is part of your world and he want's to be part of it, so he should share the cost's

CAPTDAVO

P.s interesting name haha