Need help please

ontheroad_2

I can't add anything to the great advice you've had here so far, just wanted to say, you've taken the first and hardest step, by admitting the scale of the problem, and once you've made that first phone call to one of the debt charity helplines, you'll be surprised how much better you'll feel you can cope with this.

We are all in a similar situation to you - thats why we are here .

mackenzie03

Hi - like others have said you need to phone one of the debt charities, once you tell someone over the phone who doesn't judge and they give you advice as to the best route for you things suddenly become a bit clearer. If ever you need advice please post on here - it helps more than you realise!
Good Luck x

yoyojaykay

Hi Janey,

I've been through exactly what you're going through.

My business failed leaving me with personal guarantees and debts from personal loans and credit cards that i had taken out to prop the business up hoping that i would be able to turn it round. It was a sad end to a business that was approaching 10 years in business with a good reputation but i just couldn't save it. Consequently I found myself with no business and lots of debt. After much research and a final relisation that i couldn't keep paying for something that no longer existed I decided to declare myself bankrupt. I was discharged within 12 months and if you have a very small amount/ no equity in your house you may be able to keep it...please do not take that as granted as i am only speaking from experience.

I was very nervous at the court until I heard the ushers laughing and joking about the amount of people they are currently declaring bankrupt ( i couldn't believe what i was hearing) and then i realised I was just one of very many people who turn up to there local court every single day. From that point on everyone within the insolvensy service I have found to be helpful, non-judge mental and pleasant.

After the time you realise it is all ove,r the feeling of relief is undescribable. You will have a telephone interview which lasts 20 mins and just goes through the whys and wherefores and any creditor who contacts you after the event gets automatically reffered to your receiver.

I looked at cva's, iva's etc etc. I was given very, very bad advice by people who profiited from my misery so be careful where you get your advice. Use a independent debt service not anyone who's looking to "sell" you an agreement.

I know it's not the ideal situation to be in and bankruptcy was probably the last thing on your mind when you started your business, but you've had a go, begged and borrowed in order to try and do the right thing, suffered the sleepless nights for months on end, and probably missed a chunk of your kids lives. I was discharged 3 months ago and the last 15 months have been the most stress free in over 10 years. As i say, not ideal but certainly relieved. Good luck!

p.s if you've got any further questions about overdrafts etc put them on and i'll try and help with what i've been through

mum2one

Just a thought with the bank account if you do go down the bankruptcy route, the thing I would suggest now is for hubby to open a basic account, Co-op cashminder, seems to be a very good one mentioned on the threads, and Barclays do a basic one, even if he puts a £1 to open it, gives you the options.

Don't know if you have had chance to ring any debt free charities, have your questions ready and there help you with all your options.

Good luck, were all here for you.

janey-_2

Hi,

thanks for all your advice. We went through everything last night and our debts are even more than we thought. I seriously can believe I have let things run away with us to the extent I didn't know how much we owed. I must admit I feel disgusted with myself and when we added it all up I just cried for ages. Told my Mum and Dad and they were brilliant and very supportive to thats that out of the way. OH still needs to tell his parents and I think they will be a bit judgemental at first but will come round. Next step is talking to a debt agency and I really don't feel up to it at the moment. OH will do it but is not getting home in time, working all hours at the mo. I am having good days and bad. On a happier note, I told OH that if we get through the stress of this, I will finally get married after being engaged 13 years! xxxxxxxx

Sunnylooloo

Hi Janey

you have been given some brilliant advice already and just to echo, if you need to ask anything just ask away.

I'm glad you told your parents, telling my family was the best thing that I did. Ok i know it way my fault that I was were I was my ex and I thinking we could have it all..... and then you realise er no you now need to pay it back. Sitting down with all the figures really frighttened me too.

Coming on here as helped me no end (still very up in the air about which way to go for me) and also talking to National Debtline just put my mind at rest.

Good luck with everything

Take care
LL
xx

IF

janey- wrote: »

Hi,

thanks for all your advice. We went through everything last night and our debts are even more than we thought. I seriously can believe I have let things run away with us to the extent I didn't know how much we owed. I must admit I feel disgusted with myself and when we added it all up I just cried for ages. Told my Mum and Dad and they were brilliant and very supportive to thats that out of the way. OH still needs to tell his parents and I think they will be a bit judgemental at first but will come round. Next step is talking to a debt agency and I really don't feel up to it at the moment. OH will do it but is not getting home in time, working all hours at the mo. I am having good days and bad. On a happier note, I told OH that if we get through the stress of this, I will finally get married after being engaged 13 years! xxxxxxxx

That's good janey, your sorting things out and talking things through and I'm pleased your mum and dad was supportive too. As looloo has said please take the bull by the horns (sorry about analogy!) and ring one of the Debt charities.....you will feel so much better.

That's brilliant you have something to aim for, you and OH getting married!!

Take care
If...x

janey-_2

well I took your advice and took the ball by the horns. I phoned debtline and spoke to a very nice man,( I did feel a bit rushed though) anyway he said I had to call business debtline which I did, debtline had put over my info to them so I didn't have to go through everything twice. The new advisor I spoke to was absolutely brilliant, i keep breaking down and he was wonderful and patient with me. We spoke through all our options and bankruptcy is the way forward for us. As alot of my partners debts will come to me (joint debts) I will be going bankrupt too. Great advice regarding the business side of things. I shall do all the things in the order he has advised, I really trusted what he said. I asked whether we had the biggest debt he had come across and he laughed and said not by a long way lol. Feel I have moved a tiny bit forward today but I am totally drained, 2 hours on phone in total. thanks again for all your support, I will keep updating this thread as things progress xxxxxxxx

philnicandamy

well done janey sounds like you had a pretty productive time then....good for you!

IF

Hi janey, yay!! I'm so pleased....well done you, we'll soon have this 'bull' sorted!!
Take care and do update us lol x