How resentful are you?

Tondella

My OH recently sold his motorbike and was gutted too, being a biker is part of your identity. However, we sold it on the understanding that, in the not so distant future, when our debts are paid off, we will have alot more disposable income, at which point if he wanted to he could buy another bike. Could you console yourself with the thought that sooner or later you will be able to afford to buy a bike, maybe even a really nice one?

Mirtos

There are things that I'd be resentful of losing, but I just don't list them for sale - they are mostly books, and wouldn't fetch much anyway. The odd thing is though, that I'd be very happy to sell my mobile and my ipod (the only things of value i have left, and depreciating every second!), but whenever I go to list them, my OH asks me not to. He doesn't like to see me selling everything and 'going without' - it upsets him more than me I think, even though he doesn't have debt issues. I did sell my Gucci Handbag that I'd wanted for ages, and bought about four years ago. It upset me a bit because I only got £90 for it, when I'd paid close to £400 :eek: but so many people have fakes now, that using it made me feel like a chav! Because of that I rarely used it, so I just had to remind myself of that. I also think that I'm a grown up, I can choose not to sell stuff if I want to, so why should I feel resentful? It's my decision!

sideysid

I think Im more resentful of losing out on time - as thats something you can never get back.

Admittidy my debts are very low now compared to some on here. But I've just moved to a 3 bed house from a flat last week with my partner.

We have literally been hermits for a year or so, saving deposit/fees (7k stamp duty! :eek: damn goverment) etc. Meanwhile as this may be an achievement as I am only mid-twenties, its seems mates etc can go out on nights out, and they have no idea why I can't join them. They moan about money, but I had more desposible income per month when I was in a Saturday job at 16.

It bugs me that nowadays to own a house in the greater London area, it takes two good wages to come near to meeting the repayments, and thats without throwing kids into the mix.
I know I have my house behind me now, but how are young people going to afford to do what I've done in the future?

LookingAhead

Awww I know this probably won't help much teb but try and look forward. You *will* get out of debt and providing you & your partner change your financial ways to prevent the debt accumulating again....you can then work towards getting another. Then you can keep it forever!

Getting debt free is no picnic for any of us and we all have our less than positive emotions at some point. Try not to take it out on anyone though (not saying you do....) as it is just a temporary situation....

Good luck for the future though.

teb_2

Came back here expecting hardly any replies and theres loads. Thanks!

I dont feel so bad now knowing that other people feel the same way about their stuff and their debt sometimes. My head knew it was for the best but my heart kept getting in the way and i was beginning to feel guilty about feeling the way i was which wasnt helping. partner has never said a word about getting shot of the bike, thats why i feel like i shouldnt be feeling like this. shes been so good and i dont want to make her feel upset for me if you get me?

Our debt has had huge chunks knocked off it over the last few weeks and I know i should be grateful we've been able to do that instead of dwelling on the bike. whats left is well manageable and we're in a better situation than many others. After reading some of the replies, i feel like its maybe part of the normal getting debt free process and i will try to deal with it and move on now. i might get a picture of a new one and stick it to the fridge just so everyone remembers getting a new one is on the cards at some point in the future. i hope all of you get through your stuff too, it seems easier knowing theres loads of us in the same boat. cheers for all your replies. :beer:

In_Search_Of_Me

When I sold my diving gear I was absolutely gutted as got about 800 less than I paid for it & it turned into major hassle BUT it was a valuable lesson on impulsive buying & why not to get into the same position again. I can no longer afford expensive holidays and the diving stuff was just sitting there but it represented the "old" way of life (putting the diving course & carribean holiday on my cc!) and while gutting is also quite liberating & helped when I saw the money come into my ebay acc!

lynzpower

Ive never really felt that resentful, as things have never really meant that much to me. Most of my stuff is cheapo and always has been. Sometimes Ive sold things for more than I paid for them which is a result

Personally, Id love to live a life of owning very little, the less I own the happier I seem to be. Although, no one is having the PC ( even though its not mine its OHs, but obviously, kinda MINE mwhahaa )

never_again_2

I cried the day I sold my lovely car for a 1996 ford fiesta - no power steering, no electric windows, no CD player, no air con, no central locking, Diesel engine that sounds like a tank, etc, etc, etc. Sometimes if I'm on the motorway I do actually have the crapest car on the road! If you see a battered old fiesta with no front hub caps -Wave, cos that'll be me!

But I got £1,700 cash + the Fiesta for the Corsa and paid most of my CC off. At the moment I can't afford to own something that depreciates in value at the rate of £3,000 a year. I would never buy a new car again; I don't feel they are worth the expense. Having a new car used to have status attached but not anymore because they are so easily accessible on Finance (mine was on HP too). Anyone that is willing to loose thousands in value by buying a new car is either super rich, or just hasn't had their light bulb moment yet (in my opinion).

lightatendoftunnel?

I wouldnt say i feel resentful as i havent had to sell anything important to me. I am in the process of searching the house for items to sell. Got a good collection going. I would sell my car but i have to have it for my job so i more resentful i have to have the car!!
The two things that really effect me about being in debt is not being able to go round the supermarket and just buy many of the foods we use to enjoy. Now i count every penny going into the trolley.
My main upset is not being able to go and visit my parents when i want. They live abroad, when they first went i was over every 2-3 months. Now I am lucky if i can go once/twice a year. (probably accounts for some of my debt :rolleyes: )
but all this has changed me, for the better, so no i dont feel resentful. Its just really hard some days

Tondella

teb wrote:

i might get a picture of a new one and stick it to the fridge just so everyone remembers getting a new one is on the cards at some point in the future. i hope all of you get through your stuff too, it seems easier knowing theres loads of us in the same boat. cheers for all your replies. :beer:

Absolutely do this, one of the best motivational tools for seeing off the rest of your debt as quick as you can