Is a working dad entitled to anything?

FTD

As a working dad who pays £245 a month to my daughters mother in CSA payments, would I be entitled to any benefits whatsoever?

I have my daughter at least 2, and on average 3 nights a week! the CSA payments are based on me having her 2 nights a week.

I pay into a pension and have a mortgage, again both of which were taken into account when I was CSA'd.
I live alone, not a student and have no disabilities, other then being strapped for cash!

I suppose it's the mother that gets everything???

Cheers

FTD

black-saturn

Sorry but the child is officially living with the mother as she is there the majority of the week. Do you pay for any clothes, shoes, school uniform, school trips?

nekde01

Bad news I am afraid!! You are in a similar situation to me. My daughter stays 3 nights a week and I still have to pay £300 a month with no benefits what so ever. I used to get the married mans tax allowance but this was stopped a few years ago.

viktory

FTD wrote:

I suppose it's the mother that gets everything??? FTD

Well it's certainly the mother that gets to care for the child the majority of the time! If you care for your daughter 3 nights a week, she is caring for her 4 nights a week and parenthood is mighty hard when you are going it alone!

As BS asked, do you pay for any of the extras that come with parenthood?

I know it seems tough and utmost respect to you for taking care of your child three nights a week, being part of her life and supporting her. :T Unfortunately though, the responsibility of having a child is an expensive one. Even if you were still living with the child's mother I suspect you would be no better off.

I would be interested to know if the child's mother is in another relationship, working or on benefits - all this might make a difference to my answer!

If Mum is on benefits and single then she has it hard enough already without you complaining. Also I suspect that if she is on benefits she won't actually get IS and the money you pay her - although I could be wrong on this. Please feel free to correct me.

FTD

viktory wrote:

I would be interested to know if the child's mother is in another relationship, working or on benefits - all this might make a difference to my answer!

She is working (I'm sure it's full time) and living with her partner. They 'seem' to have good money coming into the house (rented), as they've just bought a new car!

I was interested in anything, not just government benefits e.g. vouchers for the public baths or trips out!

FTD

viktory wrote:

If Mum is on benefits and single then she has it hard enough already without you complaining. Also I suspect that if she is on benefits she won't actually get IS and the money you pay her - although I could be wrong on this. Please feel free to correct me.

Also...
Please don't insinuate I was complaining, i'm JUST asking if i'm entitled to anything, I have NEVER once given the impression that I begrudge paying the CSA money, I may not agree with the way it is administered, but I would pay treble what I pay now (if I could) to have my daughter more, it just suits her mother this way, as I suspect it suits most... Just as I suspect it's the mother who has all the benefits geared towards her!!!

looby75

FTD wrote:

I was interested in anything, not just government benefits e.g. vouchers for the public baths or trips out!

It depends where you live. I live in the north east and my local council does very little for the kids in the holidays, and what is on offer usually costs a fair bit. My family live in the north west and they have LOADS of freebies for the kids right now.

The best place to ask is your local council run leisure centre (if you have one) They have the details of any school holiday (and beyond) offers that are running at the moment.

BTW I wish my ex was even half as interested in his kids as you obviously are in yours. :T

viktory

FTD wrote:

Also...
Please don't insinuate I was complaining, i'm JUST asking if i'm entitled to anything, I have NEVER once given the impression that I begrudge paying the CSA money, I may not agree with the way it is administered, but I would pay treble what I pay now (if I could) to have my daughter more, it just suits her mother this way, as I suspect it suits most... Just as I suspect it's the mother who has all the benefits geared towards her!!!

I appreciate you care for your daughter, that comes across most clearly. I apologise if I offended you as this was not my intention.

lancsman_2

<< e.g. vouchers for the public baths or trips out! >>

Not quite sure what you are looking for really. Any vouchers for days out, swimming etc would be available for any parent unless the vouchers came from a single parent organisation, in which case they are available to bothe gender of parent.

thefamousnomo

hello people

i have a little boy who lives with his mum, he will be 4 in dec. since my ex-partner got engaged to her new partner my contact with my son had dwindled to 4 hours a week. phone calls were also stopped. i consulted my lawyer (i really did want to keep the situation amicable) but this is a very long story... the point is i am desperate to be a bigger part of my sons life.

i and am now in the process of trying to get increased access, perhaps even getting the wee man overnight.

i have had to pay a large contribution to my legal aid fees, i pay £140 per month to my ex-partner to contribute to his upkeep. i gave her money whenever she took him away on holiday (last 6 months this stopped as has any communication between her and myself, since i contacted the lawyer in fact), i have clothes for him at my house, loads of toys for him, and we like to go out for the day to the zoo, soft play, etc. i spend loads at bithdays and xmas which i dont even get to see him open. every week 15-20% of my shopping goes on him for his weekly visit.

besides the awkward situation, the above all costs money. i dont and never will gudge paying anything my son ever needs, but i know my ex works min hours (on paper) and rakes in all benefits available. when i last picked him up she was getting a new fitted kitchen installed!

is there nothing for the part-time dad at all? absolutely, regardless of situation?

krisskross

thefamousnomo wrote:

hello people

i have a little boy who lives with his mum, he will be 4 in dec. since my ex-partner got engaged to her new partner my contact with my son had dwindled to 4 hours a week. phone calls were also stopped. i consulted my lawyer (i really did want to keep the situation amicable) but this is a very long story... the point is i am desperate to be a bigger part of my sons life.

i and am now in the process of trying to get increased access, perhaps even getting the wee man overnight.

i have had to pay a large contribution to my legal aid fees, i pay £140 per month to my ex-partner to contribute to his upkeep. i gave her money whenever she took him away on holiday (last 6 months this stopped as has any communication between her and myself, since i contacted the lawyer in fact), i have clothes for him at my house, loads of toys for him, and we like to go out for the day to the zoo, soft play, etc. i spend loads at bithdays and xmas which i dont even get to see him open. every week 15-20% of my shopping goes on him for his weekly visit.

besides the awkward situation, the above all costs money. i dont and never will gudge paying anything my son ever needs, but i know my ex works min hours (on paper) and rakes in all benefits available. when i last picked him up she was getting a new fitted kitchen installed!

is there nothing for the part-time dad at all? absolutely, regardless of situation?

How I feel for you. We hear lots about lone mothers struggling to bring up children on their own but seldom from the Dads.

The only thing I can say is to keep fighting for your son, he knows how much you love him which is what matters.

Good Luck.