help please, don't know what to do

morwenna

Okay. Mum's partner of twenty years died on Easter Saturday. We had the funeral last Tuesday. I rang her tonight and she was in floods of tears (and talking like she should "pull herself together") Which is typical of her, but she hasn't had such a close bereavement before... I would really like her to be at the wedding, but she now has no partner to come with and frankly, it's probably far too soon. I don't know what to do, can anyone give me any advice?

lindaatno9

I'm not sure what to suggest really but just wanted to say how sorry I am. Hope you are ok. xx

Great_Hairdresser

I am sorry for your loss. Does your Mum have a sister or good pal who could come with her and "hold her hand " so to speak.

You say she is still upset (understandable) but seems to be speaking positivly, so a wedding could be just the event to give her "something else to foucus on" (I am not being insensitive)

Good Luck

frannyann

Great_Hairdresser wrote: »

I am sorry for your loss. Does your Mum have a sister or good pal who could come with her and "hold her hand " so to speak.

You say she is still upset (understandable) but seems to be speaking positivly, so a wedding could be just the event to give her "something else to foucus on" (I am not being insensitive)

Good Luck

I think GH has got it spot on, having a close friend or relative to support her during the wedding is a very good idea.
Very sorry for her loss x

bubbles0169

ah sorry for your loss x
i wouldnt say anything to your mum yet but maybe ask another family member to go with her on the day and then maybe towards the end of next week broach it with your mum x

morwenna

lindaatno9 wrote: »

I'm not sure what to suggest really but just wanted to say how sorry I am. Hope you are ok. xx

Thank you - I am not really all that together, I just want her to feel included yet not under any pressure IYKWIM. It's a sad time and yet I want to be joyful if that makes any sense?

bubbles0169

of course we know what you mean, its an awful thing to happen at any time never mind now xx

frannyann

morwenna wrote: »

Thank you - I am not really all that together, I just want her to feel included yet not under any pressure IYKWIM. It's a sad time and yet I want to be joyful if that makes any sense?

Oh hun, have a (very dodgy) hug from me :grouphug:

McKneff

She's your mum, of course she'll be at your wedding.
I would have thought, being a mum myself, nothing but nothing would keep me from my daughters wedding, she's probably not even given a second thought about not coming. I think she will probably presume you know she is coming.
Communication is the word.
And Im sorry for your mums loss, and of course, yours. It must be very hard seeing your mum in so much pain.

mshelsbels

Didn't want to read and run........sending big hugs to you and your mum xxx

Violetta_2

Oh Morwenna I'm so sorry , such sad news. Yes it is still early day's, and she will still be all over the place, as you are of course. I would imagine she might appreciate having something else to do, keeping her busy almost. I know it's not the same but when I lost my mum, after the funeral was over I was totally lost and didn't know what to do. So something positive for her to have to get out of bed may be beneficial.
Has she said she is worried about coming alone/without a partner? Or is that your worry? Either way she will be with her wonderful daughter;) (yeah ok I know you might be a BIT busy) but I'm sure all your friends & family will look after you all & all the love that surrounds a wedding will help heal the loss a tiny bit.