Will be worse off shortly, unless I ignore medical advice! Please help.

Amistoso_2

Just a quick question OP, are you supervised 24/7 at the moment?
perhaps doing a few volantary hours a week would be your best start and you could build up from that? it won't effect your benefits and will probably boost your confidence/self esteem

jennilb

Hi Amistoso

Not by someone standing over me. My boyfriend (who lives 45mins away) and my best friend (who lives round the corner) phone me / email me every day and do this a lot when I become more depressed. They also come and do my house work for me / cook for me, when these things are impossible for me to do. I control my urge to throw myself under traffic etc by not leaving the house on those days. Luckily I have enough phobias to rule out most other suicide methods!

I see your point that, just because I need the care doesn't mean I get it, whether I'm working or not. However, it seems to me that in order to be fit to commit to working regularly (and coping with the ups and downs of work, customers etc), I need to be well enough that the incidents where I am only safe by hiding in my flat are so infrequent as to bar me from getting DLA from them? I'm not sure if I'm explaining this very well!

The pathways to work lady says I have to declare to the DWP if I volunteer now. I am concerned this would undermine my upcoming ESA tribunal. I got 0 points in my medical and so I don't want to do anything that might harm my chances (which I believe are slim as it is). I am trying to build up my 'stamina' by doing adult ed courses instead, which are all paid for now so aren't impacting on my current finances.

I'm sorry if I'm not explaining this very well. When things rush round your head they can become a bit mangled in the process

Amistoso_2

maybe best just to leave things as they are until such a time as your strong enough to deal with everything that goes with work, be it volantary or not. You're really lucky to have such a supportive boyfriend and friends you can count on to be there for you. Hopefully things will improve for you in the near future and you can make some progress towards getting out/working x