Debt Advice needed - the lesser of two evils

Edwardo72

lisawood78 wrote: »

Hmmm, if you can get your phone number taken off companies records who you owe, then surely your mail is private and your parents will not know what they contain?
I hope you make the right decision for you

That's all true BUT it only takes a rogue company to send a letter Addressed to Mr Jones and not Mr E Jones and the cats out the bag!

I do have a plan to go forward, but I am still very much exploring all options.

katsu

Edwardo,

I suspect they could find out, but what is important is that you are dealing with your debts and do not allow it to affect your health. Your parents will surely get over being cross (if they are cross to start with) and accept you are facing your responsibilities here by repaying what you borrowed.

Edwardo72

Katsu, that is true.

I have actually tried to broach the subject today, in a roundabout way but it was soon met with short shrift, so to speak.

nanna58

Hi edward :A

i have a grown up family and would go the the end of the earth for them

Thats wot a parent does. And being out of work is going to cause probs as i know only too well. So i am sure they would not be too surprised.
good luck :)

Edwardo72

tedsd wrote: »

Hi Edwardo, maybe it would soften the blow if you didn't tell them exactly how much you owe? Creditors aren't allowed to discuss it with anyone else so I can't see any way of them finding out...

Well I didn't know that about the creditors... they (the parents) will think it's the end of the world and while for the past two weeks, that is how I have felt, it is not, is it?

I have barely spent anything in the past two weeks and I hope not to spend anything (bar my essentials, of course) for as long as I can.

donny-gal

Well Edwardo, as a Mum of a 25 year old, I can tell you I would be far angrier finding out by accident than by my DS being honest with me.
DG

heatherks

hi ..if your worried about the phonecalls charges to the ccccs
have you been to the CAB ..they have money and debt advisor as well who do the same work as the cccs / debtline .

my dad was also quite upset .(to say the least) when i mentioned i needed help sorting out my finances and couldnt make ends meet / the minimum payments

...like yourself i was using savings and card sto go from month to month making sure all my minimum payents were met
.
.i did this for 3 yrs before i saught help from the CAB had a couple of kids as well
..my troubles began my ex and i had split up and most of the debt was in my name ...to save money i eventually moved back in with my dad ..
.
...my dad went mad at the beginning as he thought his address would be blacklisted ,house taken off him etc but once you get your debts sorted out and make payment you can affoard they usually leave you alone ..still get letters and phonecalls from the odd creditors ...but i can now sleep at night

good luck whatever you decide

Edwardo72

donny-gal wrote: »

Well Edwardo, as a Mum of a 25 year old, I can tell you I would be far angrier finding out by accident than by my DS being honest with me.
DG

Well I appreciate that... in an ideal world, I would be able to go to them and say, I'm in the schtum, this is what I am doing to sort it out. But they just ain't like that at all. They'll be panicing, arguing, drama, tears... it's a humdinger even thinking about it.

katsu

Good point about the house - your parents house is not affected. As long as you don't have any financial connection with them like a joint bank account or being a named person on the mortgage, then nothing can happen to their house and their credit rating is unaffected.

Your parents posessions cannot be taken to pay your debts by bailiffs.

Just some more info to bear in mind.

Good luck. It will work out OK in the end.

katsu

Edwardo72 wrote: »

They'll be panicing, arguing, drama, tears... it's a humdinger even thinking about it.

Did you ever do something bad as a kid - I don't know, break a precious ornament, get in trouble at school? Did that cause arguments, drama, panic and tears? Was it terrible at the time?

I bet you that as a kid you had some problem and your parents were mad and behaved like this. I bet that they haven't thought of it for years, and you haven't either.

There might be drama at first but they will get used to the reality and eventually get over it.

Unless that is they are still mad at you for what you did when you were 4