Pay off mortgage and start having fun!

Alchemilla

Newgirly I don't want you to feel ganged up on, but I have had the "hair on fire" though about you AND me recently. Xxx

gallygirl

Goldiegirl wrote: »

I hope you don't mind me saying all this, but I really would like to see you get on top of the situation, and I would hate for there to be a real crisis 7 years down the line, when the mortgage term ends.

Another one here who can see a real crisis looming. In seven years time isn't there a real risk you could lose everything? Or possibly sooner if you can't turn the business around? Harsh words I'm afraid, but it's going to take more than juggling money from one budget to another to resolve. If you look on MMM you'll see they don't agree with having a budget when you're in financial crisis - which to be honest I think you're on the verge of. Basically you should be spending the minimum you need to, not constantly robbing Peter's budget to pay for Paul's meals out etc.

If you've managed to survive without driving the mini for the last few weeks it's not needed and the capital tied up is needed elsewhere. That would be a start?

AlexLK

I think I've probably missed something but so far as I can tell newgirly is doing alright. Personally, I didn't think her budget was unreasonable or entitled and do not see the problem with her having a cheap classic or the odd meal out? It doesn't strike me as if she's spending an awful lot of money on things that are frivolous.

GoldieGirl had some good points about presents and "doing up" the house. I do think your budget for presents was a little high too and paying off the mortgage rather than "doing up" the house depending on what needs doing would likely be a better idea.

Another thing I have missed is why newgirly needs to have her mortgage cleared in 7 years?

Alchemilla

Because its interest only and ends then I think.

newgirly

Eek, I might just slink back to bed I think ! not sure if I'm ready to answer so many questions first thing after a great night out watching DDS followed by too much wine - paid for by grandad

First of all, the mortagage has six yrs 10months to run, its IO as I switched to that a few years ago , so I could borrow money (a loan as we could not add to the mortgage) to get the loft converted. At the time I could easily switch to repayment or extend the term.

Fast forward and we had an expensive legal fight with one of the owners of the business re selling the old factory. We ended up buying out their shares in the business (business paid). And then selling old factory to developers , with our share of the money we bought our new rented unit with an 80k loan on top.

As dh is now classed as self employed and the business shows no profit we can't remortgage, or therefore extend term, or even switch to repayment. Hence the hurry.:(

The business I have no say in, we have cut costs and have a few very large clients about to send lots of new work in too, hopefully things will pick up, we need to downsize a couple of staff ,but are unable to , two were made redundant about four years ago. But with the new changes in law and many much older staff , it means they can continue to work as long as they like , our office manager is in her seventies and has already made it clear she will not retire for many years. I just do my job on the shop floor, and have no say in the accounts, or running of the business. Its all dhs decision,which I find hard sometimes , as I often dont agree with how he does things, hence the stress at work! My marriage is more important than the business though, so I do try and keep my nose out!

I am waffling on about the business as I have to see that and our home finances are two separate issues, I have no control over it , so need to focus on home. The wages were cut this year by 5% which did not help at all.

I may start another post as this is going to be a bit war and peace !

newgirly

Eating out -

Last few weeks we have gone out more than usual, its normal for us to go out maybe once a month to the local wetherspoons, we just go on our own and it costs about £15.

The kids get a mc Donalds probably twice a month,it costs £7.14 each time for three of them.

Coffees out with friends, once a week, £5 every time its my turn , ditto if we have lunch it would be about £12 for two. So either £2.50 a week with the odd £6 week.

Christmas D birthdays

This needs a cull! I can cut one and maybe two of the list this year, Ive not saved for it for a few years, I normally do very well buying in sales through the year, this year all the women have silver jewellery at 80% off from h Samuels in the January sales.I have cut family to £10 each and the kids will have about £150 each, however this includes clothes, tolitries etc. I would buy anyway. I can't cut the list much more , but will start the surveys again to help pay for it.

" keeping up with the Jones's "-

Yes, to a certain extent not because I want to look equal, I just want to pay my own way , my best friend is very well off and does not know quite how dire our situation is, I don't want anyone offering to pay for my cup of tea when I go out. I have in the past with family withdrawn from buying coffee in turns each week and just got my own, it led to lots of grillings about how bad things are. When we used to have family curry nights , my parents and aunt would have a takeaway while I cooked ours to save money. (They didn't want my cooking , I did offer!) It made them feel awkward and they wanted to just pay for us. We don't tend to do them now.
Its a very emotive subject and I do have a thick skin, but I am also quite private and don't want everyone knowing our situation (except the whole world on mse :rotfl:)

Debt emergency-

I've already read that mmm article ed, I shall re read it though. I guess until now that has not felt like it applies to me. The other points you made are valid, I'm just being honest - probably too much. when I say I won't compromise that's maybe over the top as the mortgage will get paid and the holidays will not happen unless we have the money. I guess I do still feel a bit entitled though , or maybe just too optimistc!

Eric-

Noooo, I don't want to sell Eric I think I might have to, but I am a very sentimental person though, and would have to track him down and buy him back in the future , another mini would just not do! Plan with Eric is to see how we go over the next few weeks and then possibly put him up for sale.

Doing up the house-

Everything is shabby except the loft room and ensuite , seven years feels like a long time living like that, hence the makeover. Probably money that shouldn't be spent, we have spent half so far.

I'm going to continue with the plan to save for Xmas, holidays etc. If we can afford to save great , if we need to use it to live that's what we will do. The mortgage gets paid on pay day,so we will have to manage afterwards.

I'm going to go through the DDS just in case I've missed something, my phone contract is up in august but its only £6.40 pm with phone , doubt I can get cheaper than that.

edinburgher

Personally, I didn't think her budget was unreasonable or entitled and do not see the problem with her having a cheap classic or the odd meal out?

Not if she can afford it, it sounds like she can't!

I just want to pay my own way , my best friend is very well off and does not know quite how dire our situation is, I don't want anyone offering to pay for my cup of tea when I go out. I have in the past with family withdrawn from buying coffee in turns each week and just got my own, it led to lots of grillings about how bad things are.

If you can't afford it, you can't afford it, family will understand, as will any friends worth keeping. I suspect if you were a bit more honest with some of your friends that other people might 'fess up to a few money worries of their own. I'm not saying get up on the cross and beg forgiveness for your financial 'shortcomings', just point out that you're finding it hard work to balance the books...

The other points you made are valid, I'm just being honest - probably too much.

If hiding problems is the alternative to being honest, then you're not being too honest, you're being the right amount of honest

Be honest with yourself as well. I know you say 'I understand things are bad' from time to time, but it feels a little bit like you are due a lightbulb moment (as they call them over on DFW).

Everything is shabby except the loft room and ensuite , seven years feels like a long time living like that, hence the makeover. Probably money that shouldn't be spent, we have spent half so far.

And? My parents had a shabby home for my entire childhood, they didn't bother renovating until we had all moved out and wouldn't mess up the new decor! :rotfl:

Putting up with this sort of thing is pretty normal, I suspect those Joneses are being considered again... Some of the richest people I know (multiple homes, generous pensions etc.) have always lived in rather plain houses, The Millionaire Next Door writ large.

NG, can I ask a question that you might already have answered? Will you own your home in 7 years, or will you just have paid off the current IO mortgage?

newgirly

Hi ed, we will own it outright in 7 years.

Just had a chat with dh in bed , - needed a lie down after all the questions. He has basically said I do the finances , just do it! I got told off for ordering dd the birthday cake, so there is an mse'er hiding in him somewhere

Ed, I'm buying dd new blinds (Argos jobbies) as hers are very water stained, then I am over paying the rest of the do up the house budget.:T

I am still thinking about the car- Alex if you are reading this would you like to buy Eric and then sell him back in seven years ? :rotfl:

Another dilemma that's cropped up in the most broke of times we've had, do I sell some rings.

Jewellery , I have an engagement ring that was my grandmothers , just under a carat, but no inclusions, could never afford to have it valued , probably £4k in shops maybe 1k second hand? Dh bought it for me off my Dad for £100 way back when we were youngsters, it all he could afford, dad wanted to give it to him,but he wanted to pay

Ring 2 , a triple stone eternity , perfect diamonds , new I don't know £8k ? Large diamonds ,platinum, left to me by dads sister after she died at 50. Value £2k+ at least I think.

I wear the triple one with my wedding ring as they are both platinum , but am more attached to the engagement ring. I don't actually mind about expensive rings, can do without both if I have to.

Dad would be upset if I sold either, dh would be upset if I sold the engagement ring. Mum may possibly buy the triple ring as she has expressed and interest in the past, dad would probably be OK with that.

I should add, both have been in the family on dads side for a VERY LONG time.

Opinions ?

edinburgher

Personally? Would sell both and fund an emergency fund, don't think you have one of those?

newgirly

Think I might ask mum if she still wants to buy triple one, just spoke to dh and he says don't sell any. Don't think I will be popular selling my engagement ring.

No emergency fund ed, every time I've had one it gets spent , im using the fact we are io as a kind of emergency fund short term. Not ideal I know.