Upgrading a guest from evening to day?

floss2

We have a dilemma - some relatives can't make the wedding due to other committments so we are in a position to bump up 2 couples from the evening do only to the whole day. How do we do that now we have sent out evening invites without upsetting people?

Dizzie77

Do the people you plan to invite know that the day invites have already gone out??
If not, no problem....

If they do, or if they assume that they went out at the same time as the evening invites, then just be honest with them and say that the daytime has limited numbers due to budgets, and you felt that you had to invite relatives first.

Or - just send them a daytime invite and hope they don't question it...!!

aimee21j

I'd be delighted to be bumped up! Go for it.

Lexxi

What about a phonecall first? These people can't be that close and even if they don't think that they're an afterthought someone's bound to say it. Just call them and say, did you get your invite, are you coming, do you fancy coming to the day too. We got the capacity wrong and have extra seats!!!
That's a great way of putting it! they don;t have to think that they're an afterthought then, almost half one and I'm can think of that lol. Good luck with it

joolesw1972

We did this for a couple and a friend of a friend and they were delighted even though they knew it was because others dropped out! One was a couple from my partners work who had asked if they could pop in for the ceremony then go and come back for the evening do as they live close, so when someone gave back word she asked them if they wanted to come for the whole day they were delighted and offered to video the ceremony for us! The other was a friend of a uni friend of my partner, and we'd been asked if she could come on the hen weekend which we were fine with but clear that she only had an evening invite, I only met her at the hen weekend but really liked her, again when someone dropped out we asked her if she wanted to come to the whole thing and she was delighted!
I think it's best to be honest, most people know how expensive it is and appreciate that however much you'd like to you can't invite everyone.

Kittendreich

We did this for a couple of people and used the line that relatives we had to invite had declined so we were able to invite people we really wanted there!

Anyone who is offended that you would like them to share more of your day is just weird and doesn't deserve it!

kr15snw

Never seen anyone be offended by this. As someone else said just say 'one of the relatives my mum made me invite can't come so we get to invite more friends!'

My friends who are on the bump up list actually know they are and are hoping some of my many relatives pull out, lol.

grastgirl

kr15snw wrote: »

Never seen anyone be offended by this. As someone else said just say 'one of the relatives my mum made me invite can't come so we get to invite more friends!'

My friends who are on the bump up list actually know they are and are hoping some of my many relatives pull out, lol.

LOL at this, maybe we should have a bump up list, I wouldn't be surprised if there won't be a couple of my cousins that decide not to come.

kr15snw

We just have about 10 people who we wanted to invite but couldn't fit (venue holds 60 max for day). So they are on our 'bump up' list which is in our head, lol.

It's not an actual list!!

floss2

Lexxi wrote: »

..... These people can't be that close ....

Actually, it is friends whom we see more often than some who are invited for the whole day, but we have had to limit and be fair to each other about our friends due to the number of rellies and the limits of our budget.

Kittendreich wrote: »

We did this for a couple of people and used the line that relatives we had to invite had declined so we were able to invite people we really wanted there!!

Thanks Kitten, I think thats how we will put it.

zfrl

Sorry I thought this was normal practice. You have an A list & when some can't make it you promote some from the B list. As long as you are clear no one should get upset.
We were also thrilled when some relatives could not come so we A listed friends instead!