Budgeting/Spending Diaries/Dieting - No WILLPOWER !

stokelady

Hi

Each month I get paid I write down what needs paying and what should be left and I write daily spending diaries....this is great for the first week....then something happens where I will have a blow out (shopping trip, meal out etc etc) then I think............oh well...............will start again next month and so on and so on......if Im honest I'm the same with dieting.........need to lose some weight.....start off great on a Monday and by Wednesday I have given in and think.......oh well will start again Monday !!! From writing this I can see straight away I lack willpower !!!

I have debts to clear so I need to stay focused and I need to lose weight for a family weddding later in the year so I have incentives !!! I am desperate for any help or tips in staying focused !

Thanks :A

immoral_angeluk

You need to set yourself realistic targets. Start small, something like, if I control my spending during the week, I can treat myself to x on the weekend. Once you're used to being back in control then you can build your targets and make them more focused at what you want to achieve in the grand scheme of things.
Think of giving up unneccesary spending it like giving up smoking. If you cold turkey it's just going to end badly, whereas with support and small steps you'll get there eventually.

Tixy

Hi
I agree with IA, I think you are probably being too strict with yourself and setting unrealistic goals. Start with just aim to cut back a little but budget for some treats within the month (although do try and make them MSE treats - such as using a voucher from this site when you go for a meal).

Perhaps the weekly spend challenge would help you? http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=2321975

eatandspendaholic

stokelady wrote: »

Hi

Each month I get paid I write down what needs paying and what should be left and I write daily spending diaries....this is great for the first week....then something happens where I will have a blow out (shopping trip, meal out etc etc) then I think............oh well...............will start again next month and so on and so on......if Im honest I'm the same with dieting.........need to lose some weight.....start off great on a Monday and by Wednesday I have given in and think.......oh well will start again Monday !!! From writing this I can see straight away I lack willpower !!!

I have debts to clear so I need to stay focused and I need to lose weight for a family weddding later in the year so I have incentives !!! I am desperate for any help or tips in staying focused !

This is sooooooooo me, I can relate to every word you have siad, i'll kep an eye on your thread

thankyou

debtdesperado

Hi Stokelady...my tip is to pick ONE thing, decide a small target, and then do it. If you mess up, don't panic, go berserk, beat yourself up and then set another more extreme target... just have another go. Don't make bargains with yourself (eg I can eat this now if I go to the gym later, or if I don't spend now, I can splurge at the weekend).

So instead of deciding, right I'm going to start that spending diary on 1st month and then I will continue keeping a spending diary every single day for the rest of my life and if I don't I will have failed....think, I'll start it right now. And do it - write down what you have spent today. If you can remember what you spent yesterday, write that down too. Then just keep going. If you forget a day, or don't have time (not because you are shopping!) don't worry, just start again the next day.

The same with food - don't start a diet every monday, start now, and just think about making good/better choices at this meal. Then at the next meal, do it again. If you eat too much at a meal, think about why you did it, accept that you had good reason at the time, and then start again.

With everything instead of thinking you have to start perfect and continue perfect, imagine it as trying to join up the times when you get things right - so if you keep a spending diary for two days, then forget for a day, start again the next day and then try and keep it going for 3 days before you might forget.

Gradually the times you do things right will become more than the times you don't, and that is enough for a significant change. Hope that makes sense?!

eatandspendaholic

With everything instead of thinking you have to start perfect and continue perfect.

Thankyou for that, yes it did make sense. The above is so me. What ever I start one mistake or one slip up and as far as im concerned, ive blown it. Pack it in and start again, tomorrow, next week etc. I am also like that with Diaries, once I have wrote in it I want to rip it out and start again. I only like to write on the first page ???????? crazy or what. Definatley a life issue.

Thankyou

stokelady

Thank you for your comments, every bit of advice makes sense !

La_escocesa

Come on over to the 'what small DFW things have you done today' thread. There's a new one every day. It's great for keeping you focussed on the small steps that are helping you along the way.

I agree with debtdesperado - don't overdo it with a massive list - it'll overwhelm you. I put together a 'realistic' list on a Monday (with everything from 'call mum' to 'don't drink any fizzy drinks') and then every day I pick out the MITs (most important tasks!:o) for that day and concentrate on them. By the end of the week I've usually done most of the tasks on the weekly list - if not, I put them on next week's list or score them off if I decide I don't need to do them anyway. I got most of this off Leo Babauta's blog that I found googling one day.

HTH.

x