I Wannabe Debt-free but where do I find the willpower to stop spending?

daviesalie_2

Hi everyone

This is my first post so please be gentle Sorry for the long post, but wanted you to get the full picture.

I've stupidly let my spending get way out of control over the last 18 months and being on maternity pay for the last nine months hasn't helped the situation. I've just been through all of my credit card statements and they have totted up to almost £9,000. I'm gutted!! When I look back I haven't really got anything to show for it, apart from a load of almost new baby stuff sitting in the attic, which was used for 6 months at the most. If I'm honest with myself I knew how much debt I was in but was burying my head in the sand.

My problem is I've got absolutely no willpower when it comes to being in the shops. A little voice in my head turns on and tells me "it'll be ok to buy this you can use 'this card', its only £20" or "you can just cut back on the food shop this week to cover it"...I never do. Why doesn't another little voice pop up and tell me those £20's have built up to £9000??

When I'm sitting on the sofa looking at the figures in black and white it makes me shudder, but I know I can go shopping tomorrow and forget it all and tell myself its ok...when clearly its far from it! I've just taken the first and probably most important step and cut up all of my credit cards, so they're not an option anymore.

I've just done my Statement of Affairs Calculator. I was paying the minimum payments on my cards (one of which is the delightful 35% APR MBNA card), which amounted to £328.63p. The calculator tells me I have another £271.37p that I can use to pay off my cards, which I was probably previously spending on more stuff to fill the attic with. I've done what they suggested and allocated the £600 proportionately to each of the cards according to the % owed.

I've also come up with a few solutions which I'm going to try, which are:-

1. Arrange a standing order to put the £600 for the card payments into one of my 3 current accounts; cut up the debit card so I can't get at it, and arrange for the card payments to come out by direct debit. I should be able to leave that account run itself thereby avoiding temptation!

2. Keep the account that my wages are paid into for all my other direct debits/bills.

3. By standing order, put my spending money i.e. for food, petrol, etc, into my 3rd current account. I'm going to try just using cash for this account, taking out on a Sunday what I'll need for the week...and NO MORE!

Does anyone have any other tips/ideas? Has anyone tried the above and do you think they are feasable?

Thanks for reading...I know it was a long one :cool:

poorandindenial

Hi there

I am a reformed spendaholic. there were two things (apart from this forum) that helped me:

1) spending diary - as much a deterrant as a record of my stupidity
2) snowball calculator (https://www.whatsthecost.com/snowball.aspx) which showed me how much difference finding extra pennies would make

For the payment allocation the snowball calc will help you. As you were meeting minimums you should really throw the extra at the highest APR debt rather than pro-rataing (which you need to do if you can't meet minimums by organising a DMP)

I found that the cash for the week thing helped me, but I did it on a Thursday so that I could enjoy weekends and be skint at the boring start of the week.

Good luck getting sorted - as an ex-spender I can say that the moment I realised that I COULD sort it all out was an absolute revelation. It wasn't immediate, but the saving started to give me the high that the spending had.

poorandindenial

BTW - I say I am an ex spender, i still have my moments

But when I do it is a one off and I get back on the best behaviour again.

Kaz2904

I like www.whatsthecost.com to give me a debt free date. Use the snowball calculator to work out your date. Use your council tax free months to overpay and your rates free months too.
Any savings you manage to make by using coupons or woopsies can go straight to overpaying your debt.

Most importantly, make sure you have enough money for some frilly bits or you'll go off the rails.
Good luck!

daviesalie_2

Thanks both for you advice and THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for the snowball links!! There's finally light at the end of the tunnel :j

I've decided to reduce the monthly amount I'm going to use to pay off the cards from £600 to £550. I'm going to give the £50 to my mum to look after as a back-up with strict instructions only to give to me if she thinks the purchase is warranted. If I don't spend it then I'll pay it off a card.

The main burden was the £4k on my mbna card at approx 35% APR. I thought it would take me years to pay it off, but having used the snow ball site I've just found out that by putting £550 into my paying off my cards I can clear my mbna card in 11 months :rotfl::j:beer: and best of all I can be debt free in 18 months :T

(As opposed to only making the minimum repayments, which I've been doing for the last year, it would have have taken me 54 years to pay it off and £17k interest for the privilege...COME ON GOVERNMENT SURELY YOU CAN DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT?!?! 35% APR IS A JOKE :mad:

Its really given me the incentive to stick to this now. The thought of having £600 spare cash in 18 months time seemed like only a dream 2 hours ago, now its a definite. I can finally start thinking about saving for a deposit for a house.

I've got the biggest grin on my face...THANK YOU!

josephine82

Hi daviesalie!

Sounds like you have a great plan in place. Why not start a diary on the Debt Free diaries board? I use mine as a spending diary to track everything I spend and it is a great way of keeping a hold on what you are buying.
Also do you have small amounts of money in your budget for clothes, treats, etc? It really helped me having £20 put aside for clothes & pretty things each month even if I didn't spend it- kind of reduced the tempation to buy something for £50 and just whack it on a card. Ok you get used to buying things in Asda and Tesco but I find it really helps.

Good luck!

daviesalie_2

Thanks Jo!

I've just applied for another current account for my clothes and hair spends (got the idea from your diary).

I'm flying by the seat of my pants at the moment because I haven't had much time to sit down and spend budgeting, but I'm off Thursday and Friday so going to knuckle down with my internet banking and get things in order.

Good luck with your deposit, it sounds like your very determined. Hope I can do as well as you have!

niccatw

Hi Davies

I completely agree spending diary, snowball calculator and my DFW diary all help keep me focused. The diary especially keeps me sane - I can rant freely there And I also confess - and I'd rather confess "good" things than bad things!

Another way I terrified myself into stopping shopping was just to have the total amount of debt written down on a credit card sized piece of paper in my wallet with my bank card!!! That sure works!!!! (see my sig!)

It's taken a while, but I think I have learned to ask, "do I need it?, can I get it cheaper? Do I really need it? Why don't I wait a week and see if I really need it? Can I get it cheaper? Can I get it for nothing?

Good luck - here's hope the next 18 months fly by for you!

yellowduck_2

Hi there, what are your particular temptations. Mine were toiletries and books. Am living\existing on benefits at the moment and have had to stop spending as I will starve otherwise. But it has made me think of the things I used to waste money on to cheer myself after a tough day at work. So it meant looking at what triggers the spending, stress and upset in my case and what I spent\wasted the money on in an attempt to make myself feel better. Trouble is it is a temporary lift with a corresponding low when I realised the cash I had wasted on something that actually did not make me feel better. So I started to look at better ways of making myself feel better (if that makes sense) and it was all the cliches like spend time with friends, have a hot bubbly bath, or actually start to address the cause of the stress that triggered my spending.

daviesalie_2

Hi and thanks for the posts.

My plan didn't exactly go to plan! I gave into temptation about 3 days after the last post

It sounds easy on paper but when I'm out there in the big bad world with all those goodies lined up in front of me I'm back to my old habits. But I know I can't continue like this so this time I'm going in with my eyes wide open and only taking the cash I need. Everything is going to be planned, i.e. shopping trips, and if I don't take my purse with me everyday I can't spend what I haven't got.

I've started a diary on the debt free diaries thread so hopefully that'll keep me on the straight and narrow.

I was kidding myself with the amount I owed too and after looking into everything I owe over £15k so I'm gonna take your advice and write that on a card to keep in my purse. I've given myself a realistic budget thats more than doable and I'm putting a bit aside each month for any unexpecteds, so hopefully this time I'll stick to it!

BringtheStoneshome

Hi daviesalie

I am not in any way shape or form a spendaholic but I have had to reform my wife who is not so good with money.

My first piece of advice is to not take credit cards out with you when you go shopping. That way you can't spend on them. Secondly, I would get all that baby stuff out of the loft and sell it at a boot fair. Get something back for it.

After that I would do the diaries etc. Most important of all, have a budget, make it harsh and try and stick to it. If it is harsh then a little slip will not be disasterous but it will still make you feel guilty enough and disappointed in yourself enough to make sure that you don't do anything really silly. Get those debts cleared and then start enjoying your money without the cards (make sure you cut them up when you cancel them). Have one card with a really small limit so you can use in emergencies.

Good luck and stick it in the eye of the financial institutions

BTSH