Warning about wooden toilet seats

st999

Here is a warning about wooden toilet seats that have the grain running from front to back.

Inspect them very carefullly to make sure that they have not started to split half way down the thickness of the seat.

It is very painfull when the skin of your leg gets trapped in this split:eek:.

Stan

wallbash

I take it you have had small :rotfl: incident, that you wish to share?

trisontana

I bet that bought colour to your cheeks!

GemJar_2

ouch that made me feel a bit sick thinking about it!

Becles

Ours cracked and my ex said we didn't need to buy a new toilet seat and he would superglue the old one back together. I said I'd rather get a new one, but he was insistant that superglue would be fine.

The superglue didn't work and he got jammed in the same way, but couldn't manage to release the trapped skin, so he had to shout for me to help him. Serves him right for being a cheapskate :rotfl:

st999

The superglue didn't work and he got jammed in the same way

I was going to glue it but I think I won't bother now and just get a new one.

And it was a cheap one from Asda but I can't find the receipt to take it back.

I will get a new one from B&Q but I will have to wait until Wed, most annoying only being able to shop in B&Q on a Wed they should make it every day for the over 60's discount.

Stan

Nick_C

... and when you are working overtime in the office at the weekends, remember to make sure that the cleaner rinsed the loo seat after bleaching it BEFORE you sit down!

dampdaveski

My Brother In Law is somewhat rotund(20 Stone+)
His plastic toilet seat had cracked at the front, apparently if you used the toilet and shifted your weight onto your right cheek the crack remained tightly closed. However if you sat on it (as he did) full on as can't be helped when having a good strain, the tightly closed crack becomes an open fissure, now as I've already stated he's a bit of a chunkster, his large, full and fat @rse poured itself into the open fissure, and after he had carried out his business he went to stand up, thus taking the weight off the toilet seat and therefore encouraging the vast open fissure (with a substantial portion of his @rse inside it) to close up exceptionally quickly. he apparently screamed like a girl and vicously head butted the bathroom sink as he was involuntarily catapaulted across the bathroom.
funny thing was he ended up in A&E with a mild concussion and a ripped @rse that needed stitches. But imagine how he explained having tore himself a new @rsehole to the nurse???
This happened about 4 years ago and I still can't look at him without chuckling.
Of course I told he was very lucky and that he got away with it by the seat of his pants, but he never seems to appreciate that...

wallbash

I think ... in fact I know , that posting gave us FAR too much information :rotfl:

marleyboy

I'm not sure I would want to be caught closely examining a toilet seat, worse I'm not sure what I might find in doing so, especially inspecting something as detailed as the grain, makes me worry what might be within the grain

meetdave

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:
love it, thanks for the chuckle