Cost of weddings - think of what else could be done with the money!

isofa

sarah_elton wrote: »

It entirely depends on your personal circumstances; income, wealth, etc.

I can't imagine spending £30k; it's such a lot of money to me. But, we're spending about £11k and there's a lot of people to whom that's a ridiculous amount. On the other hand, people much wealthier than us probably spend well over £30k without a second thought.

Everyone's going to have a different amount that seems reasonable to them, depending on their financial circumstances and view of money.

I think the most important thing is simply doing it without running up debts you'll struggle to repay, or you'll end up resenting the day for months/years afterwards.

Exactly!

When we drew up our first budget list it came to the "average" wedding amount according to the magazines which litter our house! This has gone over by a few thousand since the original estimate. It's a large Saturday wedding, 90ish daytime guests, with a further 150 in the evening. We have saved the money for years, so won't be in debt, we both have professional careers and are careful with money.

Our families are also chipping in about 20% too, and we are asking for holiday vouchers to assist with our honeymoon so that'll reduce the overall cost by a bit more depending on people's generosity! We are also making all our own stationery and plenty of personal touches which is probably "saving" a thousand or so.

We have gone through a lot of family tragedy over the past few years, key people will be missing from the day, which will be difficult. Sure it's a lot of money, but we are only doing it once, and to us it's worth it.

Each to their own, and to their own budgets. As long as you can afford it and are comfortable with it, go for it. We booked most key items over 12 months before the big day and negotiated hard on most our suppliers and probably have saved a thousand or so by this negotiation too!

I know people who have spent 75K on a wedding, and others 10K. It's all relative to what you can afford and want to spend.

Pitlanepiglet

We spent £3.5k 3 years ago. Cream tea and hot buffet for 120 people, pretty well unlimited wine (well there was lots left over so I guess everyone had enough!), cava etc. Maggie Sottero dress (ebay £199!) and the whole works. Oh and a pre-wedding week at Centreparcs in lieu of a honeymoon (note - don't fall off your bike at Centreparcs a week before your wedding and get scabby knees - it's not attractive to your future husband!)

We worked hard at DIY'ing as much as we could and bought what we could on ebay.

It was very important to us to have all our friends and family with us, it wasn't just about us, it was about ALL of us and we all had a fantastic time and more importantly we're not still paying for it and I don't feel bad about the amount we spent on one day.

Mme.Hibou

Pitlanepiglet wrote: »

It was very important to us to have all our friends and family with us, it wasn't just about us, it was about ALL of us and we all had a fantastic time and more importantly we're not still paying for it and I don't feel bad about the amount we spent on one day.

Our wedding day was about us and also our guests too, I spent rather a lot on my wedding dress and lots on other things too, it certainly wasn't the "budget" wedding we discussed in the beginning. There is no way on this earth that I feel bad about the amount we spent.

I'm sure lots of people do spend years after the wedding paying it off, but who cares when they've (hopefully) got a lifetime to pay it?

You may be proud that you managed to buy and then sell stuff on eBay, I suppose i'm sort of proud we didn't. I also won't be selling my dress to anyone!

Pitlanepiglet

I think the problem with planning to pay for your wedding over your lifetime is that life has a habit of getting in the way. A couple that marries in their mid 20's and plan to spend the next 5, 7 or 10 years paying for their wedding will find that their need for a mortgage or children or similar kicks in before the wedding is paid for. If redundancy or illness strikes they will have similar problems.

What I object to strongly, is the wedding industry spiel that you have to spend a fortune to have a good day and a happy life. It just aint the case.

I didn't want to end up with my wedding dress stuck in a cupboard, I have no urge for children to pass it on to and short of pulling it out now and again to look at it I didn't really see the point in keeping it. I gave mine to one of the secretaries at work who was getting married a year later, they didn't have two beans to rub together and had the ultimate budget wedding which was lovely. She looked fantastic in the dress and I got a warm fluffy feeling from helping out. Two years later on she is blissfully happy and about to have their first child and they aren't still paying for their wedding.

I'll repeat what a friend of mine said when I was bothered about buying things second hand "if the future of your marriage depends on a dress, then you are in trouble".

It is very much each to their own and our £3.5k budget may be peanuts to some and a fortune to others. Let's not pedal the "you have to spend a fortune to have a good wedding" propaganda though.

Taadaa

It is to everyone's taste. We have got a budget of £8k excluding the honeymoon, and we are doing a fair bit ourselves - invites, cup cakes, flowers, favours. Not bothering with cars are ceremony and reception are the same place. I really want a Kate Sherford dress so am looking out for one on e bay and Pre Loved. I have ordered my shoes, but not cream wedding-ey ones, so I can wear them again. So a bit of MSE going on.

But I do get annoyed when people criticise others for spending alot of money. It's no one else's business really. Yes, it is silly to get into debt for a wedding, when a bit of thought and negotiation can easily bring the cost down; but if someone wants to do that, it's no skin off anyone else's nose.