I Feel I've Lost My Way

LookingAhead

Hi gang.

Haven't been on the forum much recently,not even to read from afar.

I feel like a sham. I've not exactly gone mad and gone sprinting off track but I do feel a little lost....and a bit depressed as well.

The car had yet another problem last week which gave us an unexpected £120 bill. I guess the plus side is, my OH is going halves and his parents (who are lovely) are saying that if anything else goes wrong then we have to call them as they want to help out. That's good but I can't face the thought of anything else going wrong. I wish we could do without the damn thing but OH needs it for work & evenings. Public tranpsort here is r-u-b-b-i-s-h.

I am sick of my hair which is naturally curly and always looks a frizzzy mess to me, so I have ordered online a book about managing curly hair which is supposed to be a Godsend. It's via Quidco and only £7 but it's £7 I begrudge having to pay.

I have also ordered about £30 worth of 'Curlfriends' conditioner/styling gel & an intensive weekly conditioner as well. £30!!! I used to think nothing of that but now I am feeling so ashamed, but am sick of looking like a fuzzball so I hope these things help. I can't get it all cut off short as I look even worse, before anyone suggests it.....if I could I would believe me.

Also, I have ordered two sets of concert tickets to see Razorlight & Keane later on in the year too with boyfriend. We've been together 4 years in August and have only been to one gig together. I love these two bands so thought "S*d it" - even though my DFW angel was poking me in the stomach saying "Are you sure?"

I guess at least, none of this is going on a credit card balance to hang around....it's all going to be paid off next month as soon as the bill comes in.
But it means less in the bank account and I'll teeter on the overdraft limit again at some point I am sure. I will need to be really good with weekly meal planning and do it really cheaply to avoid going OD. I desperately hope nothing else unexpected comes up.

Got a few things on Amazon (DVDs & CDs) that I desperately hope will sell. Wish me luck.

Cannot get motivated about exercise in the slightest yet feel utterly awful when I look in the mirror...if I can't get motivated when faced with the sight of dreadful thighs and a bottom the size of Brazil, when will I? I can see myself ballooning out of shape rapidly as the years go by like my Mum & Sister have done. I know I have total control of this yet I just feel like a bystander watching a car crash. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME!?

I was doing really well for a time (it's good that I did I know or else I would be even worse now) but I feel that I have hit a brick wall and can't reverse and go around it. I feel crap to be honest.

Well, I don't know what I expect really, but felt the need to 'unload' (how self indulgent). OH and self are going out for a walk shortly which I hope will buck me up a bit...and at least it is some exercise!

Hope I feel better later.....

Have a great Sunday everyone...sorry if I have brought you down with my post. :sad:

MinnieSpender

Hi mate.

I noticed you'd been missing lately but I'm glad to see you back :j .

You're on a bit of a low, aren't you? It gets to us all and at least you're back for some support. Better than running off and giving up. We all know you're not a quitter.

Don't beat yourself up about spending a bit. If it's any consolation, I've gone mad the past few days myself - new clothes, shoes, haircut, make-up, perfume... result? lentil soup for the next month! I've let the exercise slide too, but I'm hoping that tomorrow is another day (not doing anything today!) and my flat's a tip on top of all of it (which is what I will be doing today).

Cut yourself some slack, LA. Remember the line in Some Like It Hot - "nobody's perfect".

Welcome back!

PS - olive oil is great on curly hair. Warm some slightly (don't let it go hot) and massage it into your hair. Cover with cling film and leave for an hour or two. Shampoo out throughly. Should give it an awesome sheen.

spud30

Hi LA,

Nice to see you back.

£30 on conditioner :eek:

What's done is done. Put it behind you and make a fresh start from today. The walk will clear your head and make you feel better.

I think it's a tough time for a lot of people at the moment, me included.

Started my new, very part time job on Monday, doing LOADS of walking, plucked up the courage to check the scales yesterday and have put on half a stone

I think we need to keep each other going.

Enjoy your walk

x

PeachPickle

Don't feel bad about losing your way, just try and accept that it happened and start again. I think we all lose our way occasionally, but the fact that we're all here means that we find it again (or are trying to!)

Have you tried frizz-ease for the hair? One of my old housemates had curly hair and she lived on the stuff!

(oh, and I'm v. jealous about the Razorlight tickets )

jessicamb

Hi LA

Jump back on the bandwagon

I've got the dreaded curls too - not even nice springy ones, just a birds nest of a mess. I've taken to straightening it now because I cant stand the mess. Frizz Ease is great but expensive - or deep conditioning helps but your new book will probably have loads of hints and tips and you might as well enjoy your new things.

Hope you are feeling better soon.

Littlemiss-lotsofdebt

Hi LA :hello:

Sorry to hear you're feeling down, if its any consolation, I know exactly how you feel as I've had a lousy June, but am looking forward to starting July with a clear positive attitude.

I also have dreaded curls but straighten them to within an inch of their life!

xx

OberonSH

Hey lady, I think we've all had a dire month. We all seem to be over the intial rush of DFW, cutting down gonna be debt free oh yes oh yes. Now we all seem to have settled in for the hard slog, and it's getting us all down, not being able to buy the stuff we used to do, and havng to think about everything we spend.

The trick is to carry on, can't remember exactly but I think it's 4 months for something to become habit, and so hopefully oon we won;t hav to think about moneysaving, it'll come naturally.

Don't forget, you've knocked off £1299.15 from your debt, that's great going, Yes you spent on 'non essentials' but it didn;t put you into the overdraft, and it's not going to add to your debt.

In_Search_Of_Me

Just wanted to send a hug! Know exactly what you mean about the hair as mine is curly & people just dont get it! If its any help Kerastase do a good range fo shampoo & conditioners which should avoid the need for expensive products as hair is moisturised & curl goes lovely! Hair it would seem is a bit of a mare DFW - I have curly fine hair with grey so have cut down; go cheaper hairdresser, cheap shampoo & color it myself! Have concluded (about 10 mins ago when saw new disasterous color!) that some things just not worth skrimping on...my hair looks bl@@dy awful...dry, frizzy & v. patchy color. Color will have to wait but will get my shapooo again this week - cheap stuff just doesnt work for me.
As for the money in general you may have spent more than you should but if you reread your post you've not let go compleatly & are going to try & be good to save for the frivellous things so dont be too tough on yourself. Can you budget for things like the car so it doesent get you down so much when it happens? Just keep on plugging girl...its gonna take time, gonna be tough at times but we're all here with you!! How about setting yourself a few goals for this week on here? I findit a real help! Also it does sound as if you may be feeling a bit depressed - have you tried StJohn Wort? Takes a while to kick in but can really help...excercise can also help (she types being a complete hypocryte!!) with lifting mood and may help you loose some ibs but I know how hard this is as I have about 5 stone to loose & while know the theory putting it into practice isnt that easy is it!! Big hugaroos!

Moneymaker

Firstly, I'm very jealous of your hair. I used to have hair until I developed alopecia.

Secondly, I congratulate you on your ability to write English with perfect spelling and grammar; most people can't. That's a skill that could definitely earn you some extra money.

If you haven't read this previously, you should take a look. It was written by a guy who got himself into £28,000+ debt and got himself out again:

http://www.marketingtips.uk.com/quick_money.html

summerday

Oh hun please stop beating yourself up, you're one of my fave most inspiring posters usually so positive so its sad to see you feeling down. We really are our own worst enemies and critics. A good friend of mine has naturally very curly hair and I think its beautiful even if she puts hardly any products but she gets so fed up with it and hates it at times, especially first thing in the morning. I bet half your friends would love your hair too, it's the old grass is greener story!

So you've been spending a bit of money on hair stuff and concerts... so you've already paid up and you may as well just look forward to them rather than feeling cross with yourself. As long as you stop the spending now and keep it in check, its no major harm done. I've spent a bit too much lately, I went for a long weekend break last weekend and bought a few clothes I didn't really need but I just think never mind, I've bought them now and no point feeling guilty, hence I'm wearing one of the tops today, put on jewellery to complement it and feeling pretty cute in it Makes more sense than not wearing them out of guilt as the money is spent anyway.

With the exercise- you're so not alone in this one, I find 101 excuses not to exercise even though I really need to. Try playing your music loudly when you're at home alone and dancing wildly around to burn off a few cals! Or if you have a discman go for a walk in the local area, you'll actually enjoy it too.

You're not being self- indulgent, you're just getting the support of friends and that's a wise thing to do.

I know you will be able to move on to being more productive again, you will find your way. Keep letting us know how you're getting on, we do care

Sarah x

Jessiepig

Hi i hope you feel better after your walk.
At least you know you have gone off the rails a bit and are ready to jump back on.
Trouble is if you feel or look bad then everything seems worst.
Hoepfully your hair products and book will give you a boost to carry on on the right road
Good luck.