Just Found out OH has BIG debts

domesticgoddess

Must be something in the air, my OH and I finally had the money talk last night and he says he is going to face up to his debts, told him all about this site and the various free agencies there are to help. We may have to sell the house and rent but are facing it together.

My advice is, have the money talk sooner rather than later, I had to force his lb moment, but he said he was glad I did.

Hope all goes well with you both

dinkylou

Its not good news that you now have this debt as a family but it is great how supportive you are being with your OH.

She is a lucky lady.

Now that you are working as a team and you have us behind you to support, just think how quick the debt will go and how much better at managing your money you both will be.

A few years of suffering will then lead to a lifetime together being good at managing your money.

Also all the fruality and scrimping will help you save much more when you are finally debt free.

Every cloud and all that.

lady_fuschia

Just wanted to offer my support- I was in a similar situation myself not too long ago. I think you just have to accept that there's nothing your OH can do about it now, and help to work out a fair and workable plan for repaying the debts. It is a big downer I know, I vividly remember feeling cheerful because we seemed to be finally getting on top of our financial situation, then being hit by a sledgehammer with the news that we actually had a lot further to go than I thought. Tough, but after a few hours of cursing and pillow punching (to myself, no use in yelling at OH about past behaviour!) decided the best we could do was stick together and tackle it.
I know this probably isn't very helpful, but I just felt the need to offer some sympathy cos I know its tough!
All the best

sanfrancisco

Prosaic wrote:

quick question - she now has 3 searches shown this month where we tried to reduce the interest - would 3 months be a good time to leave it before trying again? The next card I've cancelled so she now has 3 grand less available debt

I would suggest 6 months. Could you utilize your good credit rating?

See here...

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/cgi-bin/viewnews.cgi?newsid1101485056,23650,

This is useful...

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/cgi-bin/viewnews.cgi?newsid1103204730,72152,

domestic_goddess

I've got no advice to add I just wanted to thank you for posting this as over the last few months when i have been on here I have seen many people who are scared to tell their oh's. Your wife is lucky to have you.

DrEvil_2

Hi Prosaic

Someone mentioned putting the debts onto the mortgage. I would try to avoid that as you're likely to pay a lot of interest for the following reasons:
* If you're borrowing less than £25,001, you'll probably pay their standard rate (e.g. 6.5%)
* It's tempting to borrow too much, and make smaller repayments.

The first thing I would work on is to cut down on the interest you're paying. I understand that you've already worked on this, but here are a couple of suggestions.

Pool your financial resources a little more.
* Are you able to apply for 0% credit cards in your name.
* Can you transfer some of her debt onto your existing cards etc if interest rate is lower?

Keep an eye on the minimum repayments and make sure they're managable.

This is will only work if you're able to ensure the repayments are always made on time, because you certainly don't want both of you to have a bad creit rating.
At the same time though, she does need to take responsibility. If you think that she'll miss repayments, then I wouldn't do it.

Try to clear the debt as fast as possible, and pay as little interest as possible I know this is easy to say, but not so easy in practice. Have you been to http://www.whatsthecost.com/snowball.aspx . This is excellent and will show you how much you're paying a month.

Hope this help