CSA Can't Find Ex.

mum.s

:TWould prefer an essay, it really helps. Will get as much detail as I can tonight from the CSA and note the details down and will probably go to the CAB at the weekend.

Have a similar experience to you, DS has never seen his dad, he is not interested in him, or interested in paying for him, (he said that when he left, as he was now my problem) and CSA have also said that he had asked for a blood test when they first got in touch, which he then back tracked as he is named on the birth certificate.

Good Luck with the Court Case I hope they get the rat. Will let you know how I get on with the CAB.

:A Thank you

bdt1

Something similar happened to me, youngest ds now 18, hubs at the time, told me whrn I informed him I was pregnant 'get rid of it or I'm off', by time Igot in from work that night he had in fact bu**ered off. Now he's practically a millionaire, yet has only seen his sons once in 18 years, I keep telling CSA staff this is not a 1 night stand I had this is a man I was married to - I'm not trying to fleece a man I met once, got pregs and have tried to destroy ever since.

My ex hubs now on last assessment earns in excess of 16k each month, has 22k arrears, yet is alleging all kinds of things to try and get out of paing the arrears, and I cannot believe it, but Falkirk seem to be believeing him - that's why I ended up pregnant to him in 1st place maybe????? Silver tongue could sell sand to Arabs me thinks!!! By the way he also asked for DNA at 1 point, but he had signed birth certificate, had declared child as his at divorce etc etc, so then when he found out he would have to pay for DNA finally admitted ds was his - pi** take, and totally disrespectful as I divorced him on adultery grounds???????????

So, CSA tell me, NRP tells them my ds'S (we have 2) are both working full-time?? I did tell CSA last time he saw youngest was exactly 18 years ago, so how on Earth with no contact (his choice, not mine!!) how could he know this as both are studying!!!!!!!!!It takes the biscuit, that even a wealthy comfortable excuse for a father, is still not prepared to sacrifice less than 2 month salary in arrears, which could set his sons up with deposits ona 1st property, he's scum, but the silver tongue seems to work with CSA STAFF

kelloggs36

mum.s wrote: »

What I don't understand is if they have an address for him, even though the letters are being sent back, why don't they go to the property and check to see if it is him still who is still living there as we could all send back letters that we don't want to open? or even check with Electrol Roll, Council Tax, DVLA (as if there are cars on the drive they maybe registered in his name?)

They do check with council tax, they also check with equifax to see if any credit is being obtained under his name at the address. If he isn't registered and is working on the black market, there really isn't much you can do - but do some investigation work yourself which is of course a pain in the neck!! Other than that, wait for a few months and ask them to check again with the inland revenue and equifax ect to see if he has resurfaced.

mum.s

Seems to me that Falkirk really are not interested in helping anyone, except, as you say, "silver tongued rats". When I spoke to them last week they really weren't interested in anything I had to say, they just seemed to want me to get off the phone as I was now becoming a problem and as my ex wasn't compling I should just accept it. I Just want my ds to have the things that most kids take for granted in life. His dad was never a person to hand over money (scrooge) comes to mind, to anyone, he always use to say that his money is his and no one elses, that includes his own ds obviously.

mum.s

Thank you Kelloggs36, that helps a lot. Im sure he is still working just hiding under the radar, he has always worked, all his life, he doesnt do JS or cash in hand, it doesnt pay enough.

PlayingHardball

Hi guys, reading all of the above posts makes me so angry, isn't it sad how some nrp put more value in their money then they do their kids!

I'm fighting what I am starting to believe will end up being a loosing battle, just to get the ex to pay his share. I wonder how I landed myself with such a looser in the first place!!

Thank goodness for this forum where you can get things off your chest and learn and share with each other.

bdt1

Well, my ex hubs has always on each assessment had a different 'lady' as named as living with him, although he has never s far as know involved any other children, so I think he will never find love, and tht in itself says a lot about him, he will always be seeking that something better!!!!!!!!!!!! And it of course nevern exists, so for goodness sake the day he grows up realises his legitimate sons aged 19 and 18 are financially and socially good people who could have benfitted from some input from him, my be n awakening, but no doubt his grave will come before that day - I'm not bitter just have been bewildered for all of these years at his continuous lies/deceit/convicing stories in order to deceive his boys of money, that as a self-confessed millionaire he can well afford

mum.s

Update

Thought I would just update this post...

Did a lot of detective work after this post, but nothing came to light, AT ALL. Emailed my M.P. in February with all my concerns and including as posted on this site asking for NRP driving licence and passport to be taken off him if he didnt pay.. Within 3 weeks of the CSA receiving M.P.'s letter I
received a phone call from the CSA to say that NRP had now been in touch with them and I would hear from them soon, 2 weeks ago I received a letter setting out payment dates and amounts, I was so thrilled. (though I do have to wait to see if I actually start receiving the payments now)??????

I would just like to thank you all as I wouldnt of normally wrote to my M.P. and felt stronger and able to do so after sharing and reading on the forum..... Thanks guys..

DUTR

Thanks for keeping us updated, so many episodes start but we never hear the outcome

kelloggs36

Fantastic news - I would also now be putting in a formal complaint to ask why it took an MP's intervention to get anything sorted out.