Paying Maintenance Whilst Child at University

DaveLy

Let the CSA take over?

Personally I'd sit the son, a young adult down, and explain the full situation to him, simply asking him if it's fair. No bias, simply cold hard facts.

Perhaps he can 'technically' move in with you, since his mother is so unreasonable. Given he'll be at Uni most of the time anyway. That way you'll be responsible for 100% of his upkeep?

Ultimately, ask him who he wants support from, right now, and later on in life, a woman with the ambition to work 2 and a half days a week whom 70%+ of their income comes from a failed marriage 10 years ago, or 2 people that love and care for him greatly, work full time, with obviously good careers.

Explain to him you want to live your lives, you both work hard and would love to afford more holidays, a better home, more savings for retirement etc. and ultimately paying out £800 a month is a joke.

Sensemaya

I would contact Stephen Lawson.

http://www.fdrlaw.co.uk/StephenLawson.asp

She is a very greedy woman.

Oldernotwiser

I've only skim read this so sorry if I'm missing something.

As the problem seems to be that you don't want to pay the maintenance and the university costs, why don't you pay the maintenance and NOT the university costs.?
I can see you could have problems stopping the maintenance but whether your husband chooses to pay the university costs is his own concern. The son's student finance will be assessed on his mother's income anyway as he lives with her and the question of whether she chooses to give him the £800 per month is surely between the son and his mother.

Agin, apologies if I've missed something; it won't be the first time!

cavkc

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

I've only skim read this so sorry if I'm missing something.

As the problem seems to be that you don't want to pay the maintenance and the university costs, why don't you pay the maintenance and NOT the university costs.?
I can see you could have problems stopping the maintenance but whether your husband chooses to pay the university costs is his own concern. The son's student finance will be assessed on his mother's income anyway as he lives with her and the question of whether she chooses to give him the £800 per month is surely between the son and his mother.

Agin, apologies if I've missed something; it won't be the first time!

Thanks for your comment, our 'moral' issue is that we want to support him financially at university, but cannot afford to do both. She has made it quite clear that she will not contribute from the £800 per month towards his fees etc.

How can anyone be expected to pay child maintenace when that child is no longer living at home!!

Would student finance not look at our income at all? They have joint custody, and he spends 50% of the time living with us. Also, his 'home address' is ours according to his school records.

Rikki

cavkc wrote: »

Thanks for your comment, our 'moral' issue is that we want to support him financially at university, but cannot afford to do both. She has made it quite clear that she will not contribute from the £800 per month towards his fees etc.

How can anyone be expected to pay child maintenace when that child is no longer living at home!!

Would student finance not look at our income at all? They have joint custody, and he spends 50% of the time living with us. Also, his 'home address' is ours according to his school records.

With him living with you 50% of the time and your home address be his point of contact for the school, there is no reason why you could not claim his child benefit. Then she wouldn't be entitled to any maintenance or only half the amount you are now paying.

You really need legal advice.

MissMoneypenny

cavkc wrote: »

We pay my husbands ex-wife £800 per month in child maintenance. This is under a Court Order from approx 10 years ago. The Order states that we pay the maintenance as long as he is in full time education, or to first degree.

AFAIK, a Court Order can only be altered in court, so you would have to return to court. So even if the childs mother had agreed that you pay the child direct now that he is at uni, you would still owe the mother the money as that is what the court order states. If you want the amount you pay lowered, then you go to court, although the judge could rule that you pay more than you are now.

I had a court order against my ex and he had to continue to pay maintenace until our children had finished university. My daughter did a PG straight after her first degree and her father had to keep paying until she finished. I assume the judge put in "first degree" to give your OH a cutoff point which seems a bit unfair on a child. Still, its a lot better than the children on CSA as their NRP can stop when they leave school! I know a decent NRP will continue to financially support their child through university, but there are too many that don't.

You could ask the court staff for the appropiate booket and form, to apply in court to alter the child payments from the mother to the child. The staff are not allowed to give you legal advice, but they know a lot and can point you in direction of the correct booklet. They helped me when I took over my case from my solicitor (he was useless) when my ex refused to pay the court order and it only cost me one court fee. I didn't have to go back to court as I presented all the evidence when I submitted the application. Without a solicitor slowing it up, within a couple of weeks my application had been through two courts and they had retreived all the late payments and ensured he was never late paying again.

kelloggs36

speedster wrote: »

just stop bloody paying her.

the court wont enforce it and will tell her to go to the csa.

and as the child will not be residing with her, she'll get naff all.

off to primark for the fricking gold digger!! :rolleyes:

Bad advice - this court order stands until it has been revoked and by simply stopping paying, all that will happen is that she will seek to get it enforced and the courts will have no other option but to do so - certainly up until such point that a change is sought.

I feel that you would need to seek a variation in this order on the grounds that your circumstances have changed, ie you earn less money now and then bring up what you wish to do - and leave it to the courts.

pd001

Sensemaya wrote: »

I would contact Stephen Lawson.

http://www.fdrlaw.co.uk/StephenLawson.asp

She is a very greedy woman.

For specialist help re the csa the there are also other options.
Here are a few for you to consider....its a copy and paste from a previous posting of mine

I have heard of NACSA, google them. I believe that for general information they are very good. It’s cheap to join as well!
When you join they can be a mine of information.
However, when you ring them you have to leave a message and then they call you back. They tend not to answer the phone when you ring them.

Others on here mention a solicitor called Stephen Lawson who is supposed to be very good when it comes to all matters CSA. I have no personal knowledge of him at all.Don't know what he charges but I have read on these forums that he will give you an estimate of his charges at the beginning.
Probably not cheap

There is another firm called Durham Legal Services and I have only heard mixed reviews about them. I have no personal knowledge of them at all.
No idea about their charges, probably not cheap

There is another firm called Child Support Solutions who are in Birmingham.
They specialise in all matters CSA related and charge a monthly fee.
In some cases they take over all contact with the CSA and basically fight your corner for you.
I do have personal knowledge of this company. I am not affiliated to this company.
Not cheap, but very effective in my case!

The above are the main people/companies/solicitors who specialise in dealing with the CSA. Google them all and see what you think

HTH

speedster

kelloggs36 wrote: »

Bad advice - this court order stands until it has been revoked and by simply stopping paying, all that will happen is that she will seek to get it enforced and the courts will have no other option but to do so - certainly up until such point that a change is sought.

I feel that you would need to seek a variation in this order on the grounds that your circumstances have changed, ie you earn less money now and then bring up what you wish to do - and leave it to the courts.

not quite. this course of action will force the court to act if she kicks off, otherwise, would the court hear the nrp properly???? my way gets it into the arena to be dealt with.

your way is another option but could take yonks. forcing her to act may well be a better option.

it's called tactics, as i have stated to you previously, not everything is as black and white as you would like it to be.

while there are grey areas, different approach doesn't mean bad advice.

we are all entitled to an opinion. if you don't like others opinions, that doesn't make them wrong.

MissMoneypenny

speedster wrote: »

not quite. this course of action will force the court to act if she kicks off, otherwise, would the court hear the nrp properly????

When my ex fell behind with his court order payments, the first thing he heard (got) from the courts, was a warrant! They sent me a copy too so that I could see he had been served.

Once the court is alerted to the fact their order is not being complied with, they act.