Obliged to continue working so hard???

Darnit_2

Can anyone answer a question for me?
I am bancrupt, and am expecting an IPA.
This sounds terrible, but I am seriously considering reducing my hours at work. Fact is, I have worn myself into the ground over the last few years trying to keep everything going, and I failed. I was part time, but I upped my hours a few years ago and went for promotions etc. The intention then was to earn more per year, so I could resume part time working and get the same money. Now I am not where I want to be. I feel so stressed, at work as well as home, I am on the verge of going off sick. But if I went back to part time working, like I did before, I feel that I would be able to maintain work better without ending up long term sick. I have a lot of responibilities at home, and I feel like I am missing out on so much of my kids lives. Would I end up in trouble if I did it now?

Can the OR make me stay in work?

So_Sad_Angel

Hi Darnit.

The OR cannot make you continue when it is making you ill.

I can only say that, as someone who has nearly killed herself through working so hard just to pay the bills, your health always ALWAYS comes first.

Get yourself to your GP asap. get checked out.....don`t wait until you are staring over the edge as I was....I would often be on the motorway wondering what would happen if I just swerved into the next bridge....such was the stress I was under.

Stress is a very serious condition...your GP may well agree you need time off to get your head straight & then you can look at your options with fresh eyes.

I hope this makes ssense to you....if you want to pm me then please do.

Angiexx

MicheH

Your life is what you want to do with it, if you go part time so what. It's like saying to me (i'm a stay at home mam now with 2 children) you can earn to pay towards an IPA so get a job found misses.

If you want to go part time then go part time. That's my view and don't know of IPA rules but I would think nobody in IS can make somebody work a certain amount of hours.

Hope you get the answers you're looking for and I hope you can get the home/work balance right

Darnit_2

Thanks folks. I am not at the end of my tether at the moment, I am better when I have been at home for a few days with my family, but as soon as I think about work I fill up like an idiot. I think I am just worried about the interview and how our spending looks to the OR. Trying to remember all the things we paid for out of what money, and our situation isn't straight forward. So, if I have a hard time convincing the OR that I haven't been reckless, how does it look if I then reduce my income - deliberately. Could that in itself lead to a BRO or whatever it is called.

tigerfeet2006

No it couldn't. People quite often use BR as a way as starting a fresh, new life and starting again. We have even had people on here give up work to go back to uni. and the OR has not batted an eyelid. They know that on the run up to BR people work all the hours god sends just to pay to live and service the debts, they know it is not sustainable indefinatly.

So don't panic and do what you have to do for you and your family.

Darnit_2

Thanks a bunch tigerfeet et al.

I spoiled my weekend worrying about work, and today just decided that I am going part time, and re-build my life and my health and fitness. Life is too short. I have so enjoyed thinking about all the things I want to do (that don't cost the earth). I have worked out that before the OR has time to impose an IPA, I just have time to catch up with a few things,squirrel some away and pay for a frugal christmas ready for a drop in income.

I am almost a little excited now, I am going to get fit, learn a language, claw money back for little extras doing car boot sales with stuff I used to give away, and grow some veg and make jam and chutney .

How odd am I?

confused76

hey Darnit
sounds like you have come up with a good plan!
defo agree that your health has to come first....
i took the decision recently to go part time, i suffer from chronic migraine and daily headache, drag myself round 5 days of the week and spend the other 2 recovering, and never actually do anything! have felt like life is passing me by. so....going part time in two weeks! i want to get fit and try to reduce the migraines, this is my main aim. sadly as a consequence i have to go br, i can't keep up with the min repayments on p/t wages. i am lucky that my partner and family have seen what i have been going through and thoroughly support my decision. big decision with implications but couldn't carry on like that.
sounds like you are excited about going part time too! very best of luck!!!!! x

Darnit_2

Thanks confused, I think deciding is the hardest part when you are stressed out. I am usually a good decision maker, but I can't seem to decide what to have for breakfast at the moment. Today is the first day I haven't had a real cry for ages (just a bit of welling up and lump in throat) , so that tells me it is the right decision. Fact is I am in my forties, overweight, don't sleep, don't exercise, tired all the time, constant indigestion, stresssed out and unhappy. That HAS to change, or it was all for nothing. There I said it!

philnicandamy

Good for you darnit!....the main thing is you & your health THATS the priority..know your limits I certainly did thats for sure I became ill after a nasty car accident & my job was pretty fast paced worked god knows how many hours a day with everything until one day my OH said something's eventually going to give & she's scared it would be me..I dropped some hours while bankrupt & the difference it madeimproved things a little..eventually though I sadly had to finish work as my health problems were causing problems (but thats another story!!)

confused76

Darnit wrote: »

Thanks confused, I think deciding is the hardest part when you are stressed out. I am usually a good decision maker, but I can't seem to decide what to have for breakfast at the moment. Today is the first day I haven't had a real cry for ages (just a bit of welling up and lump in throat) , so that tells me it is the right decision. Fact is I am in my forties, overweight, don't sleep, don't exercise, tired all the time, constant indigestion, stresssed out and unhappy. That HAS to change, or it was all for nothing. There I said it!

i agree, my decision making is non-existent at the moment!
sounds like your situation is very very similar to my own....it has probably taken me two years to make the decision but i feel relieved that i've admitted to myself that i am not coping physically mentally emotionally or financially. i am terrified because i am setting down a different route to what i am used to, but it is time! and it sounds like you're at the same point too!

do you have to get your bosses to approve your part time hours?

i hope you are having a better day today and have been making plans of what you want to do on your days off. don't be scared of the decision, go for it!!! x

alastairq

I've discovered...as have so very many of my colleagues....that it is really far better to do a job of work one really enjoys doing..but for fewer hours and/or a lot less pay, than one COULD earn, doing a harder job with longer hours.

What folk sadly neglect is ''quality of life''.....................

often,high remuneration goes hand-in-glove with long hours, and no home life.

in the end, it all depends whether one wishes to 'live for work'....or one wishes to 'work to live'?


so, what do I get for my low pay, but job I like?

well....30 days leave a year, plus bank hols, plus a fortnight at Xmas..or nearly so....I've had paternity leave...and can take up to 5 years sabbatical....get paid when I'm sick..and , in addition to the leave/hols....am allowed up to 14 days sick in any rolling 12 month period, self-certified.....so thats around 60 days , all paid!

then my working day is a straight 8 hours, with an hour's breaks in total.....and it doesn't really MATTER if I turn up a few minutes late...for sure, the admonissions come, but are easily fended off......


and the job itself I can do standing on my head...but don't cos it hurts.....yet, it is a skilled job.....


The next best job is trolley collecting at Tesco's.....warm winter clothes, fresh air, and nobody constantly on yer case?