Sorry for neglecting you!

Lewby

Hi everyone. Just a note to say sorry for neglecting the board for the last few weeks. I have had a pretty turbulent time .... let me explain.

Last year I made a very serious complaint at work against one of the partners (who is also the Director of the company). 3 other women also came forward (so you may be able to guess what the complaint was about) and it was independently investigated. The complaints were all upheld and after 5 long months of serious stress it was agreed that he would become a silent partner and I would get my life back to normal and carry on at work. I had already lodged the complaint with the Employment Tribunal (had to do it within 3 months) and that is due to happen in October 2006.

Unfortunately the company is really poor at dealing with complaints and the partner dealing with the complaint refused to appoint a solicitor - which has made life really difficult. He said he would make the other guy a silent partner and I must take his word for it but 3 weeks ago concluded the complaints process with an outcome that said he would be coming back to work!!! This is what has caused me to be off work and absent from here as the stess has been incredible.

I decided that the only thing to do was to resign from my job ... not an easy decision to make as I've been there 14 years, earn £35k, have a car and fuel allowance and a company phone. I contacted benefits etc and looked at writing to all my creditors to tell them I'd resigned and couldn't pay them anymore. I wrote to my employer to say that I wanted to appeal otherwise would have to resign and claim constructive dismissal but he wrote back saying no appeal process available as the partner is not an employee and therefore not subject to the diciplinary procedure anyway!

I spoke to my solicitor who said I had no choice but to resign, that was last Thursday, and finally got my head around it all .... cried a lot but knew there was nothing else I could do. On Thursday afternoon my employer phoned me to say that he wanted it all sorted out, didn't want to go to Tribunal (as they are totally in the wrong and it will cost them a fortune) and he wants me back at work. He said he would do whatever I wanted to get me back (within reason) and wanted to meet with me. I was soooooo confused!!

Anyway, I met with him and stuck to my guns about him getting a solicitor to draw up a compromise agreement with my solicitor as I would only agree to go back to work if a legally binding document is drawn up because I don't trust him anymore. He reluctantly agreed because he needs me back at work (seems I'm more important than I thought!). So it looks like I will not be unemployed now and will not have to face financial ruin (although my debts are huge at least I can still pay them off).

I will still get compensation which I will use to pay off my debts and at least I still have my job, which I love! My solicitor is going to insisit that the offender is made to be a sleeping partner only and have no managerial responsibility for me or anyone else (there are also legal bodies looking at it as the job we do is highly regulated).

I am totally exhausted and unfortunately the stress has meant that I haven't been able to focus on anything else .... not even this site which I truly love beng part of! But I'm back .... feeling much more positive and looking forward (finally) to my life getting back to normal, carrying on my DFW mission and chatting to 'my friends' about day-to-day saving!

Sorry for the long post but I wanted to share it with you so you know where I've been. It's not that I didn't love you all anymore .... just needed some space .... but here's to getting on with life! :T

Lewby xx

lynzpower

hells bells its all been going on for you hasnt it?

missed you around here!

Wizwoo

OMG Lewby - well done for sticking to your guns. I can't (OK I can) believe that people get away with such things.

It can't be easy now though - you love the job but must have lost all respect for the company / people you work for.
So brave of you to make that complaint especially since nobody else at that point had done so.

Glad to see you're back on your feet again though :grouphug:

Ali-OK

Hey Lewby, it's great to see you back!! :wave:

What a terrible time you've been having, but well done for sticking with it and hopefully, an outcome you can live with.

Spirited_2

Sounds like you've been through a lot and are getting out the other side of it. I'm new, but just thought I'd say welcome back

clairey_em

Blimey Lewby, sounds like you've really been through it these last few weeks, but well done for being strong, it takes considerable courage and strength to get through tough situations like this - you've done so well and I'm sure everyone here is very proud of you!

glad you're back

x x

tesuhoha

i'm so glad its worked out the way it has. It would have been totally unreasonable if you had had to resign your job because of some perv. Lovely to see you back.

skintchick

THis sort of thing disgusts me - why should anyone have to put up with being harrassed at work? And why do some men think it's perfectly OK?

I am so angry for you!

I do hope it all works out for you hon, but remember that if it doesn;t, and you have to leave, then we are here for you and it will be OK in the end.

When I lost my job earlier this year I was so scared, but now i am earning more than I ever have in my life! If you're a good person then I think life and God look out for you.

Big hugs xxx

domestic_goddess

Hi there, I'm quite new but I wanted to say you should be very proud of yourself for what you have done. Because you have taken a stand he won't be able to do it to anyone else. You sound like you have been to hell and back again but at least you know you have stopped anyone else going through the same hell in the future.

Be proud

duncans-mum_2

Very Well done for standing up for yourself, and sticking to your guns when the going looked tough. Hope the final outcome is one that you are able to work with, and that you can put all the stress behind you.

Broken_hearted

Hugs I hope you feel better now, bullies are bad enough in the playground but adults should know better. I'm so proud you stood up for yourself, if you hadn't and just left he would have moved onto the next victim.