I need help so badly

beanielou

Just wanted to say hi & welcome & to say that Martin who founded this site says that theres no debt problem that cant be solved.
Keep posting

LeeSouthEast

Hi Welcome to MSE!

Disclaimer: I'm a bit blunt. Don't take any of this the wrong way. I want to help and wrapping things up in fluffy stuff isn't my style and doesn't really help anyway.

Any mortgage arrears? Deal as a priority.
Any council tax arrears beyond existing payment? Deal as a priority.
Is the car secured on unsecured? If secured, on what? You need to find out.

Now, the rest...

Christmas: Stop worrying about it. It's cancelled and over-rated anyway. Your children will just have to deal with it and perhaps learn some valuable lessons along the way. When I get to the food section, you can make them some nice nosh instead. If you have the time and resources, make them presents. Bottom line is you can't afford christmas this year. You have considerably more going out each month than coming in.

Mortgage: Is this repayment or interest only? If repayment, talk to your lender about switching to interest only. Is it fixed or SVR/tracker? Find out and tell us.

FOOD BILL! £500 is waaay too expensive. You can budget about £100 per adult, and £50 per child at the absolute most and still live well. Check out the 'Old Style Moneysaving' board for advice on recipes, home cooking and so on. That will instantly give you £150 extra, if not closer to £250 by the time you get into the swing of things.

Mobile! You can afford it. Cancel it.

Council tax: Are you paying over 10 months or 12? If 10, ask to pay over 12.

Gas/Electricity: Options limited with arrears, but almost £200 a month is excessive. Do an energy audit. Unplug stuff. Use the line rather than the washer/dryer. Wash clothes by hands. Turn lights off. Turn down your thermostat for heating AND hot water. USE LESS.

Internet: £15 is quite expensive in the grand scheme of broadband offerings these days. Switch provider or lower your package.

Clothing: £30 is £360/year and is excessive, even with 3 children. You adults will have to make do with what you have I'm afraid. The kids will get no new clothes until theirs falls apart or needs replacing due to growth. Even then, consider charity shops first.

Car: You say in an earlier post you would prefer (I think you used that word) not to lose the car. Do I take it then that is is not essential? If so, GET RID OF IT. It is costing you an absolute fortune and if you can make do with other transport methods, then do so.

Emergency Fund: Good!

Your debt is large. Can your partner get a second job? Can you work from home (I appreciate child-care issues if you go out to work)? Are you getting all the benefits you are entitled to?

I am sorry if this a) upsets you. It is not my intention. It's just reality. and b) if it upsets anyone else. I refer back to my disclaimer above.

LittleMiss, are in the BEST place for help and support - even from grumpy sods like me. MSE rules. Get slashing that budget, and find out what you can shave off then come back and we'll go to round 2

LittleMissSkint

LeeSouthEast wrote: »

Hi Welcome to MSE!

Disclaimer: I'm a bit blunt. Don't take any of this the wrong way. I want to help and wrapping things up in fluffy stuff isn't my style and doesn't really help anyway.

Any mortgage arrears? Deal as a priority.
Any council tax arrears beyond existing payment? Deal as a priority.
Is the car secured on unsecured? If secured, on what? You need to find out.

Now, the rest...

Christmas: Stop worrying about it. It's cancelled and over-rated anyway. Your children will just have to deal with it and perhaps learn some valuable lessons along the way. When I get to the food section, you can make them some nice nosh instead. If you have the time and resources, make them presents. Bottom line is you can't afford christmas this year. You have considerably more going out each month than coming in.

Mortgage: Is this repayment or interest only? If repayment, talk to your lender about switching to interest only. Is it fixed or SVR/tracker? Find out and tell us.

FOOD BILL! £500 is waaay too expensive. You can budget about £100 per adult, and £50 per child at the absolute most and still live well. Check out the 'Old Style Moneysaving' board for advice on recipes, home cooking and so on. That will instantly give you £150 extra, if not closer to £250 by the time you get into the swing of things.

Mobile! You can afford it. Cancel it.

Council tax: Are you paying over 10 months or 12? If 10, ask to pay over 12.

Gas/Electricity: Options limited with arrears, but almost £200 a month is excessive. Do an energy audit. Unplug stuff. Use the line rather than the washer/dryer. Wash clothes by hands. Turn lights off. Turn down your thermostat for heating AND hot water. USE LESS.

Internet: £15 is quite expensive in the grand scheme of broadband offerings these days. Switch provider or lower your package.

Clothing: £30 is £360/year and is excessive, even with 3 children. You adults will have to make do with what you have I'm afraid. The kids will get no new clothes until theirs falls apart or needs replacing due to growth. Even then, consider charity shops first.

Car: You say in an earlier post you would prefer (I think you used that word) not to lose the car. Do I take it then that is is not essential? If so, GET RID OF IT. It is costing you an absolute fortune and if you can make do with other transport methods, then do so.

Emergency Fund: Good!

Your debt is large. Can your partner get a second job? Can you work from home (I appreciate child-care issues if you go out to work)? Are you getting all the benefits you are entitled to?

I am sorry if this a) upsets you. It is not my intention. It's just reality. and b) if it upsets anyone else. I refer back to my disclaimer above.

LittleMiss, are in the BEST place for help and support - even from grumpy sods like me. MSE rules. Get slashing that budget, and find out what you can shave off then come back and we'll go to round 2

It doesn't upset me, I know I'm a muppet for running up the debt - someone else sticking the boot in can't punish me more than I punish myself.

Your points: Christmas - as a mother I want to give my kids a good xmas - I just want them to be happy. I'm one of those people who feels guilty for the whole worlds problems so this causes me a lot of guilt. I know I can't afford it - but it doesn't stop it from breaking my heart.

Mortgage is fixed, repayment.

Thanks for the advice on the food, I'll check out that board and see what we can do there. That's not just food I include nappies etc in there too! I will do my damn best to knock it down though.

Mobile: noted. I rarely top it up anyway, but thought I'd best include it.

Council Tax: Paid over 12 months.

Gas/Leccy: I already do my flippin best to keep this way down I seriously have no clue why it is so high. Just got a new bill e-mailed to me right now, don't even understand it.

Clothing: I do keep it as minimal as I can I haven't bought us adults new clothes for donkeys, kids I only get when totally necessary. I probably don't spend £30 a month on it - I was just trying to make sure I wasn't unrealistic in what I put.

Car: Doesn't really matter to me I don't drive. Hubby would have to get buses to work though and it's ages away and would cost heaps in fares. I'm not sure where we stand on it, but looking into life without it.

He isn't allowed a second job because of the nature of the work he does already. I can't think of anything I can do from home thhat would actually make money that didn't require outlay. Yes we get what we are entitled to. He gets 47K a year you don't get many benefits on that.

Thanks for your time and your help.

Oh, just noticed I missed the top bit. Yes we have mortgage arrears - the £574 we pay now is only for 6 months, then it will go back to the £499 it used to be pre-arrears. Council Tax Arrears are up to speed paid by arrangment. The car is a mystery to me. I'm not even sure if it is HP or a loan. I can't find the paperwork. It isn't secured on anything that I know of. We've had it 2 years and there are 2 years to go in paying for it. If we sell it we won't make enough to pay off the finance. =|

LeeSouthEast

I wasn't trying to stick the boot in I promise. I just come across that way half the time.

I don't have children, so I can only imagine what you're going through in this regard. But consider this: If your children grow up expecting lavish gifts, it ruins not only what Christmas is supposed to be about in the first place but also teaches them some very bad money habits. If they see you tightening your belt when the chips are down, they will know to do the same or better, not get into such circumstances to begin with.

Mortgage: Thanks. Can this be changed at all? Will the penalty negate any benefit?

Feel free to scan your bills. We can help decipher them for you (blank off your name/account no/address etc.)

Clothing
Mobile

Car makes sense to keep, if you know the bus works out more expensive. An annual ticket in the town I work is £350. The average cost of annual motoring is £3,500 after taxes, insurance, fuel, servicing etc. Find out if the bus would be cheaper and maybe save a packet.

The big problem is the maintenance payment to his ex. Do speak to one of the debt charities and see if a DMP might be an option for you?

WASHER

You must get child benefit and child tax credits? Are these in your SOA?

WASHER.x.

RAS

LittleMissSkint wrote: »

Your points: Christmas - as a mother I want to give my kids a good xmas - I just want them to be happy. I'm one of those people who feels guilty for the whole worlds problems so this causes me a lot of guilt. I know I can't afford it - but it doesn't stop it from breaking my heart.

Have a read of this and follow the links http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=1981821

There are some great ideas.

Mortgage is fixed, repayment.

Can you arrange to you interest only when you are on target again?

Thanks for the advice on the food, I'll check out that board and see what we can do there. That's not just food I include nappies etc in there too! I will do my damn best to knock it down though.

Lee is being generous. MSE does budgetting and stripping to the bone. A month or two on the bone might enable you clear one or two of the mst difficult debts

Mobile: noted. I rarely top it up anyway, but thought I'd best include it.

Council Tax: Paid over 12 months.

Gas/Leccy: I already do my flippin best to keep this way down I seriously have no clue why it is so high. Just got a new bill e-mailed to me right now, don't even understand it.

Get OH to go and read both meters and then check that the reading is right.

Go round the house and turn everythiong off, except the fridge and freezer and check that they are not eating leccy. There was a TV prog which showed a guy that his old fridge was eatign £30 per month and he could be a new A++ one for just over £100.

Then switch on one thing at a time and check the meter each time.

Do you use energy efficient lamps.

Clothing: I do keep it as minimal as I can I haven't bought us adults new clothes for donkeys, kids I only get when totally necessary. I probably don't spend £30 a month on it - I was just trying to make sure I wasn't unrealistic in what I put.

Join www.freecycle.com or the equivalent and get kid's clothes for free (and presents and household stuff).

Car: Doesn't really matter to me I don't drive. Hubby would have to get buses to work though and it's ages away and would cost heaps in fares. I'm not sure where we stand on it, but looking into life without it.

Check out local weekly and monthly offers. They vary enormously.

He isn't allowed a second job because of the nature of the work he does already. I can't think of anything I can do from home thhat would actually make money that didn't require outlay. Yes we get what we are entitled to. He gets 47K a year you don't get many benefits on that.

Oh, just noticed I missed the top bit. Yes we have mortgage arrears - the £574 we pay now is only for 6 months, then it will go back to the £499 it used to be pre-arrears.

Good

Council Tax Arrears are up to speed paid by arrangment.


The car is a mystery to me. I'm not even sure if it is HP or a loan. I can't find the paperwork. It isn't secured on anything that I know of. We've had it 2 years and there are 2 years to go in paying for it. If we sell it we won't make enough to pay off the finance.

Check your credit records and then come back.

At the chance of sounding rude, what have you spent this money one? Anything you can sell?

LittleMissSkint

Can what be changed about the mortgage? We had to agree to pay them extra every month or they were all for taking us to court over the arrears. I'm not sure about changing to interest only, I really dont know much about how mortgages work. It is with the Coventry BS - If this helps at all.

I will try scan my leccy bill. It baffles me, it seems to be basing an awful lot on a huge estimate for a seven month period.

Doing some work on the costs of car/no car - will update when we know!

The maintenance is a killer. It won't go down until his odlest turns 16 (3 years woop woop) or leaves full time education (maybe not 3 years....booo) then it will be halved. Then when his youngest is 16 (5 years) there will be none :beer: It will surely be a happy day. I'll see what we can do about a DMP, I didn't think we had anywhere near enough.

WASHER

Are the debt figure accurate? I notice they are all rounded up, are these from the actual statements?

Do you have an overdraft as well?

According to your SOA you have approx £339 before debt repayment, if you enter into a DMP with that, its going to take at least 23 years to repay your debt. I would personally consider bankruptcy, its nothing to be scared of. Have a read of the bankruptcy board. This may be not what you wanted to read, but I believe in being honest with you.

WASHER.x.

LittleMissSkint

RAS wrote: »

At the chance of sounding rude, what have you spent this money one? Anything you can sell?

I seriously have no idea what we even spent it on, we have nothing to show for it. I think that in itself is the problem - we were living off credit - just using it for day to day stuff. In the 7 years we've been together (since I was 17) we've never once had a holiday or bought anything lavish - with the possible exception of the car. Which isn't even fancy it's just a Fiat. We don't have big flat screen tellys and all the latest gadgets.

LittleMissSkint

WASHER wrote: »

Are the debt figure accurate? I notice they are all rounded up, are these from the actual statements?

Do you have an overdraft as well?

WASHER.x.

They're just rough off the top of my head, they are near as dammit though. I was in a hurry to get it done and when the kids are about my feet I don't wanna be bringing out all the paperwork and getting in a state. It's not fair on them. We don't have an overdraft - Nationwide withdrew it.